LEGEND GARY PART TWO

[the Fallen]

Gary is just the latest from a long line of Garys and so is his daughter he hasn't met yet until she's 16 and has mates

[the Fallen]

Gary gets a new highscore on the Test your Strength punching bag with a running jumping roundhouse kick

[the Fallen]

Gary whistles in admiration at an Audi

[the Fallen]

Gary's giving a bird a tour of all the merry little places he's done coke

[the Fallen]

Swaggering drunk and lairy on San Miguel, Legend Gary once again expounds his unified plan for dealing with all the padoes

[the Fallen]

Gary's giving a bird a tour of all the merry little places he's done coke

Behind that fruit machine

Behind that skip

Off her arse

[the Fallen]

Gary's giving his coke dealer a tour of all the places he's had poontang

Behind that fruit machine

Behind that skip

In that police car

[Glebe]

Daz is absolutely fucked on Winalot Prime.

[the Fallen]

Legend Gary wears his best suit for the dog track

[Fambo Number Mive]

Gary puts a load of his poos and a few herbs in a blender and makes Steak Terry some "lovely oxtail soup". That'll show him for trying to out-prank the Ledge!

Gary heads a basketball into an orgy.

[king_tubby]

Gary has Daz play entrance music off his phone when he goes into a room and it's Jackass

Indie Dave tells Gary that the Minutemen were a hard left DIY punk bank and seconds later Daz is once again at the GUI clinic getting a phone removed from his rectum.

[the Fallen]

Gary campaigns to have more betting adverts during football

He has a great love of the beautiful game. Gambling, the sport of Kings

[Glebe]

Gary organises a Full Monty lads' strip for charity. "We can get our cocks out in front of the birds lads and raise money for the BNP at the same time!"

[jenna appleseed]

Daz is at that stage of drunkenness where he starts singing Eiffel 65's 'I'm Blue'.

"I'm blue da ba dee da ba di da ba di..."

"No Daz!"

Gary's limbs start to move and he's away.

"He'll be dancing for hours!" laughs Sociopathic Stew.

Sociopathic Stew gets turned into a stew for daring to laugh at The Gary(tm)

[the Fallen]

Gary is alarmed to hear the tumbling clatter of coinage falling, some reward dispensed at the machine fruit wherein he has put many a money and it has awakened some nasty umbrage within him. Legend Gary notes who has claimed the bounty and watches him intently all night. Thief

[the Fallen]

Legend Gary kicks dog shit down the road til he reaches Daz so he tries to kick it at Daz's face but he misses and Gary keeps on playing, doing dribbles, finally scoring a goal

Edited -BAdmin

[shoulders]

Legend Gary likes Jews because "I respect the fact they have never tried to go near me, nor me them'

[Fambo Number Mive]

Legend Gary mentions at the beginning of each of his podcasts that "nonces are not welcome to listen to this, if you are a nonce turn this off and listen to something else."

Ironically, 1% of Gary's 300 listeners are nonces.

[shoulders]

Legend Gary is conflicted by who his new club is aimed at as he wants it to be a 'guy thing' but he also quite wants it to be 'dripping and indeed crawling from head to toe in escort quality clunge. And I don't just mean Pontefract escorts, I mean Wakefield escorts'

[the Fallen]

Legend Gary has done the guzzling beer running all down his chest celebration thrice in recent memory

Excluding the vasectomy

[the Fallen]

Gary commands the Uber driver to slow down so he can pick up a brass for God's sake

Then starts telling my man how to set the radio station something romantic

[Glebe]

Daz discovers that Gary has an irrational fear of Lucozade and so he starts carrying a bottle with him everywhere as a defence mechanism.

"C'mere Daz, it's time for a a bashing!"

"Look Gary it is a bottle of Lucozade."

Gary stares in terror and starts to emit a horrified, unearthly whine.

[the Fallen]

Legend Gary blooters the fuckin fruity in to all hell and the lovely rumble of coppers comes tumbling clanging out and Don't kick off guv I can tip ya so 2 Stella, what you havin Daz?

[the Fallen]

A senior lightly brushes by Gary who has just popped out of the loo for a snoot of chime

Squares up.  And his grandson

[Glebe]

Gary buys new girlfriend Shontelle three French hens. When I say 'buys' I means 'steals' and when I say 'hens' I mean 'lame pigeons' but it's the festive though that counts!

[king_tubby]

After shorting stock and making 375k, Legend Gary shits himself in Beast, just to feel something.

[Glebe]

"You're such an ugly little twat Daz."

"That's unusually forthright of you, Gary!"

"Don't mention Forthright! I'll wup your ass at that!"

[the Fallen]

Gary gifts his mother Christmas flowers from a nearby accident black spot then realises he got mixed up when he stopped off and left a baggie of sniff nestled within the blooms in case of Feds so asks for it back

[the Fallen]

Gary cuts off a Jag at the lights on foot

[king_tubby]

Legend Gary's mum gets some flight records to Little Saint James redacted.