Star Trek Picard S2

[Malcy]

Spoiler alert

Also fuck you, Rios, keep your mouth shut and let notData kill himself next time.

[close]

That was a huge fuck up.

[JamesTC]

Must have been to some other dark timeline when the cameras weren't rolling.

Oi, Season 5 of Enterprise would have been wonderful. Jeffrey Combs was going to join the cast full time.

[Lemming]

What the fuck was that? Such a confused mess. We've got three plots going on at once - Seven and Raffi turning into mini CGI versions of themselves to run towards the ship while knifing people, Picard and Romulan going into the tunnels to talk about his miserable childhood, and Rios and the doc saying they love each other in an apartment. No plot develops properly and we switch between all three at random.

The rule for writing these days is that if something isn't on the screen, it no longer exists. The house is beset by green-laser-sight troops, but Picard wants to reflect on his mother's suicide, so they're gone (after the ones in the room are beaten up). Jurati needs to talk to the Borg Queen, so Raffi is knocked to one side and vanishes from existence as soon as she falls out of the frame, until she's needed again to dramatically yell "nooo" when the Queen re-Borgs Seven. Quite a bit of time elapses over the course of the episode, but Rios' plot doesn't move at all unless he's on the screen.

I want to hug Brent Spiner every time he's on screen. I'd always had the impression he was a little bit of a knob and Data's not my favourite character, but poor Brent just seems to be suffering in every scene he's in. He knows it's shit, no doubt about it.

The Jurati and Borg Queen merger is ok conceptually, but as Wonderful Butternut says, far too quick.

Also, lol @ Elnor stabbing loads of people again. Great stuff, love it. He's got the Doctor's mobile emitter too, wonderful. Just a shame he didn't say his fantastic catchphrase - PLEASE MY FRIENDS, CHOOSE TO LIVE.

Two things, in addition to the Icheb-in-Starfleet fuckup that's already been pointed out:
- Why can't they just use the Romulan's puff-of-smoke teleporter to go into the ship? If it was explained, I missed it because I was saying "oh god" out loud a lot. They use it to send Rios away, but why not just use it to beam the rest of the gang into the ship, or right up next to the ship, negating the need to go running around in the tunnels (pointlessly) and for Seven and Raffi to Rambo their way through a shitty cover shooter segment? My friend I was watching it with just kept saying "or, we could use the teleporter" in Kryten's voice for the entire scene.

- How did Picard know about Jurati? As is often the case with this show, characters traverse vast distances in a matter of seconds if they're needed in the current scene, but he goes from being in the greenhouse to suddenly being with the rest, and he says "we've lost a friend, but found... OURSELVES". But did anyone tell him about Jurati's fate? It only happened like a minute ago, and he was nowhere nearby.

[JamesTC]

Completely undermine the Borg, Seven, Starfleet and Picard in a single episode, all the while playing with mental illness and suicide like it is an Alex Kurtzman mystery box. But at least they made sure they didn't contradict a Season 1 TNG episode. Wow, these writers really do care.

[grainger]

Completely undermine the Borg, Seven, Starfleet and Picard in a single episode,

Haven't they already been undermined beyond repair by Picard S1 and other recent Trek?* I mean - is there anything left of what they originally stood for - anything at all?

*Actually, to be fair, the Borg were undermined beyond repair by Descent in TNG; we can't blame everything on new Trek (although I am going to anyway).  And actually, Picard was basically ruined in the TNG movies, so what am I talking about?

[Lemming]

Every episode gets worse the more you think about it. Actually watching it feels like being a cow who's just been shot in the head with a bolt gun, just stunned uncomprehending horror. Then it ends and you think "jesus". Then an hour passes and you sit there thinking "Picard's a robot and Seven and Raffi just had to drive a knife into a man's head because he'd been Borg'd after agreeing to work as a mercenary for Hitler Data, who's working with the Borg Queen to bring about the dark future" and you can't figure out how or why any of this exists, or who it's aimed at, or what the writers and actors must think about the end product.

[grainger]

Seriously - consider not watching it then. Watching it only encourages the fuckers. [says me, who's still reading this thread, so I suppose still hate-watching it by proxy]

[JamesTC]

I only watch Picard because I do a podcast. Not seen any other new Trek since the fourth episode of Discovery.

[Alberon]

I drifted away after the second episode of this season and nothing I've read here or elsewhere has tempted me to try it again.

Strange New Worlds starts next week. If that fails I'll just stick to Prodigy, Lower Decks (which has climbed from unwatchable to reasonable) and The Orville.

[Lemming]

It's not possible to look away from, for me. I dropped Discovery right at the start of season three because it was boring and didn't resemble what I wanted from Star Trek, but Picard is a special case, it's so inexplicable that it inspires a sort of awe.

Discovery felt like watching a beloved pet cat be kicked around (distressing and disappointing), while Picard feels like watching a beloved pet cat be put into a blender, turned into goop, and then Michael Chabon comes in and gathers up the watery gore and slaps it into the shape of a shitty dog and tells you it's your original cat, good as new, and then takes a dump on your kitchen floor. It's such a jaw-dropping thing that you can't look away, even though it physically hurts to look.

[Wonderful Butternut]

Seriously - consider not watching it then. Watching it only encourages the fuckers. [says me, who's still reading this thread, so I suppose still hate-watching it by proxy]

I only watch Picard because I do a podcast. Not seen any other new Trek since the fourth episode of Discovery.

It's not possible to look away from, for me.

Well let's all just remember that when Kurtzman is given another extension to his time in charge and we're wondering who's actually watching it.

For my part I ditched Disco after 3 seasons, which was at least 1 too many, and Lower Decks cos I was starting to fast forward past bits by episode 5.

Also, lol @ Elnor stabbing loads of people again. Great stuff, love it. He's got the Doctor's mobile emitter too, wonderful. Just a shame he didn't say his fantastic catchphrase - PLEASE MY FRIENDS, CHOOSE TO LIVE.

That actually does annoy me now that we're talking about it. Cos you just know here's what's went on in the writers' room:

"Hey guys, what if we had sort of Romulan Jedi? Except edgier? They can't have lightsabres or force powers obviously cos Disney would sue us. But you know what I mean."
"Jedi if they were TOTES AWESOME?"
"Yeah. They could say something cool when they go chopping heads off that puts the decision to commit murder off them, even though in most cases they could just disarm the baddie."
"How about: Please my friends, choose to live?"
"Yeah... oh that's really good... REALLY good."
"Let's have sex."
"Yes."

[grainger]

I think I must have a much more fragile relationship to movies/TV than most. Watching all this drek (modern Star Wars, modern Trek) spoils (to one degree or other) my enjoyment of the classic material that I love. It's funny - it doesn't happen so much with bands. I accept that, say, REM went total dogshit, but that doesn't put me off their earlier stuff. Everyone here seems very happy (and easily able) to separate it out.

[Spoon of Ploff]

Funniest moment for me has to be when

Spoiler alert

they forgot to film Soong Mark I's get away and had to make do with the audio queue of someone scuttling off instead.

[close]

On the whole I've found Picard too ludicrous to spoil TNG which I've also been watching recently.

[Pranet]

Like I've said, it doesn't make me angry like it makes some of you, but it is very silly.

At times it reminds me of one of those cheap science fiction/fantasy shows ITV or Channel 5 would show late at night in the late 90s or early 2000s.

Other times it reminds me of Buffy or Angel- the ditzy one going evil is basically Joss Whedon's one plot, except whatever he may be as a man he was good at making entertaining television- better than the lot running Picard anyway.

On this episode they seemed to picked up the "It is an important moment when time is of the essence, lets stop and talk about shit for hours" thing that happens in Discovery.

[Malcy]

Keep meaning to ask.

Where is Picard's brother in all of this?

[Sherman Krank]

Just occurred to me that they should have called season two Star Trek: Picarder and then season three Star Trek: Picardest.
They missed a trick there.

[Deanjam]

Keep meaning to ask.

Where is Picard's brother in all of this?

There was a line in an earlier episode that he was away at school. Not surprised you don't remember.

[beanheadmcginty]

I'd love it if Picard sacrificed himself to save everyone again at the end of this series and then at the last minute they brought him back to life as a hologram that will somehow age exactly the same as if he was human. And in series 3 almost no mention was made of him being a hologram.

[Mr Trumpet]

- Why can't they just use the Romulan's puff-of-smoke teleporter to go into the ship? If it was explained, I missed it because I was saying "oh god" out loud a lot. They use it to send Rios away, but why not just use it to beam the rest of the gang into the ship, or right up next to the ship, negating the need to go running around in the tunnels (pointlessly) and for Seven and Raffi to Rambo their way through a shitty cover shooter segment? My friend I was watching it with just kept saying "or, we could use the teleporter" in Kryten's voice for the entire scene.

Now I had a fair few problems with this episode myself, and I say that as someone who's broadly a fan of the show. But really "why didn't they just use the transporters" is one of those questions that's really not worth asking of any Trek series. It would solve about half of all episodes at a stroke.

[kalowski]

I'm just glad those two Borg took 30 seconds to aim their green beams at Picard giving Rios enough time to reboot the Romulan transporter so he could appear in exactly the right place and shoot them straight away (even though it happened so quickly he had no idea that they weren't allies.)

[Lemming]

Now I had a fair few problems with this episode myself, and I say that as someone who's broadly a fan of the show. But really "why didn't they just use the transporters" is one of those questions that's really not worth asking of any Trek series. It would solve about half of all episodes at a stroke.

But in this case they use it in the exact same scene. They have to get to their ship, some distance away, surrounded by mercs. They all collectively agree that the best way to do this is to engage in a brutal, ultra-dangerous battle against the mercs, inching their way up towards the ship while under heavy fire. This plan is so dangerous that Seven even mentions that she doesn't think she or Raffi will survive.

As they're about to go, Rios is injured, so first they use their handy teleporter to send him away to the other side of the planet. They then pocket their teleporter and set off for the ship on foot.

[kalowski]

I drifted away after the second episode of this season and nothing I've read here or elsewhere has tempted me to try it again.

I am now only watching it to see if they can keep making each episode worse than the one before. So far they have succeeded every time so I can't wait for the season nadir next week.

[JamesTC]

Will they be explaining whether Worf has two penises in Season 3? If not, then I am NOT interested.

[Lemming]

Please please please let them put Worf in the new, Discovery-style Klingon makeup. Please. The fan outrage would be so intense that it'd be one of the greatest comedy spectacles of the decade. Not to mention the sight of Dorn trying to act while inevitably being visibly fucked off about the whole thing.

[JamesTC]

And let him get his knobs out.

[Zero Gravitas]

It's a scam to get that Star Trek Collectible Card Game reissue cash and I hate it.

[Malcy]

I think we can all agree the second series got off to a good start then dropped off a cliff.

Terry Matalas was responsible for the first few then the rest is Kurtzman. Gives a glimmer of hope for the TNG reunion that is apparently all Matalas.

[grainger]

They'll definitely do a great show next time.

[Mobbd]

I think we can all agree the second series got off to a good start then dropped off a cliff.

Nah, it was dogshit from Minute One.

[elliszeroed]

HAHAHA

Spoiler alert

It's all about love...
And a Wil Wheaton cameo!
And the entire universe almost ending because Borg Queen cannot say "I'm here to help!" before using her tentacles!

[close]

Oh look it's Brave New Worlds... written by Akiva Goldman and Kurtzman! These guys are killing it!