Cunt of Death Day Jubilation Spectacular

[Ferris]

Got to wear a top hat at a pals wedding and I must confess I quite enjoyed it.

Get 'im, fellers!

[Sebastian Cobb]

Get 'im, fellers!

Wasn't even best man, just turned up.

[Ray Travez]

Holographic gangbang

Got to wear a top hat

Man you bin a naughty boy, you let your face grow long

[The Dog]

QUEN MEET PADINTORN:

https://twitter.com/mrmikecowan/status/1533164454057332736

Just seen this now, it is one of the worst things I have ever seen.  I am 95% certain the bear is sedated.

[Video Game Fan 2000]

its not a bear its a malnourished child that's been pelted with damp merkins

[Zero Gravitas]

Platinum Jubilee: Queen 'humbled and touched' by celebrations

HUMBLED!

HUMBLED!

Humbled by an entire nation dropping everything and dedicating a 4 day bank holiday weekend with horse shows and a Diana Ross concert to you!?

Are we taking bets on how long she'll last? If today is J+1 I'm betting on or around J+25.

[TheMonk]

Perhaps the reason for the Diana Ross miming is that it's probably illegal to sing obscenities to the Royal Family at Jubilee events :

You make me tremble when your hand moves lower
You taste a little then you swallow slower
Nature has a way of yielding treasure
Pleasure made for you, oh

[Kankurette]

I know Louis is only 4 and acting like any other 4 year old boy would but if Meghan's kid acted like that, nobody would go 'awww, kyoot'.

Paddington 2 is a cracking film tbf

This is true. I love Hugh Grant in it. Paddington > quern.

[Glebe]

Only just watch the Paddington clip now. That's what's-his-name off This Time as the butler!

[Paul Calf]

That's not a hologram. That's a ghost.

Haha. Fucking hell, imagine travelling hundreds of miles to bow and scrape your stupid fucking rubber head on the filthy streets of London in front of HER FACKIN MAJESTY HERSELF only to experience the bait-and-switch that old London town is famous for in the form of a steampunk 3DTV.

You'd be livid, but you'd have to keep smiling and waving your flag or the whole thing would just crumble.

[Glebe]

Bungle absolutely livid that he was passed over in favour of Paddington.

[Paul Calf]

I saw that the other day. This isn't the first time Solomon has come out with stuff that's either progressive or at least challenges the tabloid ITV group think.

Yeah, there's more to her than meets the eye.

[Paul Calf]

Have to say I'm no monarchist. Quite the opposite, really. But you do have to say, fair play, the Queen does do a bloody brilliant job.

I mean I'm no fan of the royal family or anything like that. I'd probably have all their heads on spikes if it was up to me! I mean in 2022, it's ridiculous really. But you do have to say, end of the day don't you, no word of a lie, that old Lizzie does us proud up there, she really does.

Don't get me wrong! I think the royal family are all lizard paedophiles from space that are noncing up our babies before devouring their flesh in order to remain young. But you do have to say don't you, fair's fair, that our Liz has been gobbling up them little human kids for 70 years now and not a word of complaint. Fair fucking play to her. We don't deserve her really. Not sure how much she's getting paid for all this noncing and gobbling but I bet you it ain't half as much as she's worth. God bless the old girl.

Is it just me who hears this read in the voice of Abigail from Philosophy Tube?

[idunnosomename]

If she reigns another 10 years, what's the 2032 jubilee called?

Atomic Jubilee
Infinity Jubilee
Chaos Emerald Jubilee
Unobtanium Jubilee
Dragonball Jubilee
I am become Death, Destroyer of Worlds Jubilee

[gilbertharding]

If she reigns another 10 years, what's the 2032 jubilee called?

Atomic Jubilee
Infinity Jubilee
Chaos Emerald Jubilee
Unobtanium Jubilee
Dragonball Jubilee
I am become Death, Destroyer of Worlds Jubilee

80 is 'Oak', boringly apparently. Could happen.

[idunnosomename]

Wasnt sure if wedding materials are the same as jubilee ones. Bit odd the oak one. Maybe she could turn into a tree like David the Gnome.

[Blue Jam]

For her Oak Jubilee maybe Phil will give her a nice gift of wood.

[Neomod]

That's not a hologram. That's a ghost.

This just reminds me of that Spirit of London ride they used to have at Madame T's

There's no way Tussauds haven't been consulted on the future animatronic Liz T200

[Kankurette]

If she reigns another 10 years, what's the 2032 jubilee called?

Atomic Jubilee
Infinity Jubilee
Chaos Emerald Jubilee
Unobtanium Jubilee
Dragonball Jubilee
I am become Death, Destroyer of Worlds Jubilee

Over 9000 Jubilee

For her Oak Jubilee maybe Phil will give her a nice gift of wood.

Charles will give her a coffin. "Hurry up and die you old hag WHOOPS I meant 'Mummy'."

[Bad Ambassador]

Mentioned to my mum that it seemed a odd for the headline act at the Queen's works do to be called Diana.

[JesusAndYourBush]

^^
And Duran Duran played and they were Diana's favourite group.

It's the Queen's "official birthday" on Saturday.  Trooping of the Colour etc.  They only trooped it a few days ago, now they're gonna have to do it all over again.

[Norton Canes]

I don't want to start any blasphemous rumours
But I think the Queen's got a great sense of humour
And when I die, I expect to find her laughing

[Glebe]

Actually feel traumatised by this Jubilee. And I'm not even British!

[touchingcloth]

Actually feel traumatised by this Jubilee. And I'm not even British!

Get back to the outback, Yanky boy. Sick of you Hispanics coming over here from the subcontinent, taking our jobs like a typical Slav.

[Glebe]

Get back to the outback, Yanky boy. Sick of you Hispanics coming over here from the subcontinent, taking our jobs like a typical Slav.

Ironically I'm from darkest Peru - where I earn a pittance mining oranges for British Marmalade!

[touchingcloth]

Ironically I'm from darkest Peru - where I earn a pittance mining oranges for British Marmalade!

This bear found this one weird tip to make pittance. The city of Seville hates him.

[Huxleys Babkins]

^^
And Duran Duran played and they were Diana's favourite group.

It's the Queen's "official birthday" on Saturday.  Trooping of the Colour etc.  They only trooped it a few days ago, now they're gonna have to do it all over again.

Maybe they could troop a different colour this time, to mix things up a bit.

[Glebe]

They should troop for people of colour!

[Ferris]

Just had a sandwich from a shop off the highway in the absolute middle of nowhere, run by a batty British couple. Covered in bunting and flags.

I burned it to the ground, naturally.

[poo]

Missed the whole thing I was high on a boat