Computer Dating

[Lord Spong]

Anybody got any experiences,stories or opinions?  
Has anybody found true love this way?  
Did you end up on a date with a psycho?
Did the 'petite blonde' turn out to have extraordinarily large hands, and a strange obsession with 'The Crying Game'?

I've always thought this kind of thing was a bit sad, but It's recently aroused my curiosity.  Perhaps I'm getting old.  I have a friend who met his girlfriend over the internet, and now they're living together.  I don't think I'd want to go that far, but I'm curious what sort of response I might get, and I'd be interested to hear other people's stories and opinions.

[smoker]

a guy i work with, maybe early forties, just hit his mid-life crisis last year. he spends most of his income now on flash cars, fancy clothes and trips to places like cambodia and switzerland. he started internet dating nearly two years ago, and always goes for women in their mid to late thirities, women who've had their families and careers and now just want a bit of fun. he's seeing someone at the moment but for a period of about a year he was meeting a different woman every week, sometimes more than one, taking them out to dinner and almost invariably taking them to bed after.

how do i know all this? because he used to come into the office every monday morning and relate every single detail of his weekend to us.

[Frinky]

Then it was all an elaborate lie.

[Manford Thirty-Sixborough]

I tried dating a computer. I had a lot of fun with it, but the sex was... quite shocking.

[chand's girlfriend]

are you talking about dating sites or just meeting people through internet in general?


cos, this forum is soon having a big meetup. what if two people fall in love on it? will they be a pathetic internet couple?


what annoys me about most debates of this kind is that they often fail to make a distinction between going to a dating site and paying for a date, and just accidentally hooking up with someone while discussing politics on a random internet forum.

[El Unicornio, mang]

I tried dating a computer. I had a lot of fun with it, but the sex was... quite shocking.

Damn you, I was going to make that joke! I would have used words like 'hard-drive' and 'floppy' and 'preferences' though, cos I'm best.

[Mister Six]

Unicorn cleverly avoiding having to point out that he married someone that he met on the internet.

[untitled_london]

Damn you, I was going to make that joke! I would have used words like 'hard-drive' and 'floppy' and 'preferences' though, cos I'm best.

i would have gone into details about screening for virii, and slave & master stuff too cos i'm better

:P

[Rats]

His joystick was too small, it was a 3.5 inch floppy with no hard drive and his USB ports were the old ones and weren't fast enough to keep up with my external dvd writer.

I'm bestest it seems

[@ssmaster]

Damn you, I was going to make that joke! I would have used words like 'hard-drive' and 'floppy' and 'preferences' though, cos I'm best.

i would have gone into details about screening for virii, and slave & master stuff too cos i'm better

:P

I was going to mention Windows like having a window into relationships and memory like memorising telephone numbers...I'm not very good at this am I?

[El Unicornio, mang]

Unicorn cleverly avoiding having to point out that he married someone that he met on the internet.

Um....
okay, well it worked out for me, but to be honest, if I'd known it would take so much hassle to get visa's (over 18 months and I'm still waiting for a work permit) I'd have tried to find someone closer to home. So my advice is, go for it, but try to avoid trans-atlantic ones.

[Manford Thirty-Sixborough]

His joystick was too small, it was a 3.5 inch floppy with no hard drive and his USB ports were the old ones and weren't fast enough to keep up with my external dvd writer.

I'm bestest it seems

I inserted my genitals into a piece of mains-powered electrical equipment, and, in retrospect, greatly wish that I had not.

[chand's girlfriend]

I've always thought this kind of thing was a bit sad, but It's recently aroused my curiosity.  .(...).

i also wanted to say, if your friend has found true love and is happy, you can not give yourself the right to judge it as sad just because you cant imagine yourself beeing in his shoes.

what is actually sad is when you are in a happy helathy relationship, but your friends do not respect it and they look down on you and talk behind your back, because it doesnt fit THEIR idea of how a relationship should begin.

a little tollerance and respect, and minding-your-own-business as well could do us all good sometimes.

[Lt Plonker]

I'm trying. I've got the rating of 'Honey' from 1 user on Faceparty.

I've messaged a girl who stated her 'Perfect Partner' would be an older Harry Potter. :D

[Rats]

great minds and all that, pitty his hairs not grey

[untitled_london]

#1060 +(161)- [X]

<tokage> ha ha 'geek' weddings - "Do you, GandalfGreyhame, take cyndrekit to be your lawfully wedded wife in uptime and down, for low processing power and high, till someone unplugs the power cord

<Idle_Timmy> "What kind of 'bandwidth' do you get, if you know what i mean"
<Demonhunter> hehe
<Idle_Timmy> "Depends on your 'hardware', sugar" ;o
<Idle_Timmy> "So where can i 'plug it in'?"
<Idle_Timmy> "oooohh, you bring the 'modem', big boy, and i'll give you an 'outlet'"
<Idle_Timmy> "oh yeah, baby, I got your modem RIGHT HERE"
<Idle_Timmy> *pulls a laptop out of his trenchcoat*
<Demonhunter> lmao...
<Idle_Timmy> "now let's see if my 'router' is compatible with your 'hub' and we can get some 'peer to peer' action going"

gotta love QDB

[23 Daves]

I've said this before but I'll say it again... I once used a dating site for a bit during a particularly dry patch in my love-life (and following the advice of a friend of mine who met her boyfriend that way and is presently pregnant by him).  I found it really didn't work for me, and I met my present partner through us both working in the same office.  Nice and traditional and boring, that.

I am very cynical about how people present themselves online and the 'reality' of their personality.  If you've been mailing someone or chatting to them online for years then it's a lot safer as guards tend to drop, but just for a few weeks or a couple of months - it's very unreliable.  Anyone can rattle off an e-mail making them sound gregarious, generous, compassionate and lovable because e-mails are easy to edit.  Your real personality isn't.  

Also, the other thing I noticed is that a lot of women on the sites are very into the 'hard sell', which I'm most definitely not - they expect the men to advertise themselves to the hilt on their profiles (where I'd preferred just to give an honest summary of who I am and what I'm looking for, which a few people liked as it seemed 'refreshing') and they also seriously over-emphasise their own attributes.  You just wouldn't do that if you met someone normally - you wouldn't walk around like some giant slogan unless you were a complete pranny, the kind of person who always leaves his BMW keys on the table just so the woman 'knows'.  I would say absolutely nobody I met lived up to the image they'd sold themselves on, with the exception of one woman who just plain wasn't interested in me.  That's not to say they were bad people on the whole, they just had very peculiar ideas about who they were (which may have been how they'd come to end up on a dating site).

Then again, I didn't stick it out for very long, and it has given at least one of my friends happiness so I suppose I'm not the expert on this topic.   It's worth doing for the experience and it definitely gives you an exciting build-up to a few nights out, but that's as far as it went for me.  

Oh, and you'll probably read more profiles of women who want the moon-on-a-stick on these sites than anywhere, a la:  "Hello, I'm Jan!  I suppose my problem is I really want to meet a man who is strong and hard-nosed, but at the same time sensitive, and I'd like him to go clothes shopping with me but he should be rugged and butch and not too showy and dressy himself, I want a man not a woman, and I really want to meet someone who is confident and uncompromising but is ready to always give way to me, and they should have a good job which leaves them some time for me, be at least 6ft tall, and have a good body.  He should also be a musician, because I just LOVE guitars!  Does anyone out there fit this bill, because I'm starting to wonder?!".  So yes, sometimes people are online for a reason... ahem.  I suppose the advantage of profiles like this is that you know what you're dealing with and what the person wants straight away, so no time is wasted.

[untitled_london]

yup - i'll second 23 dvaes on most of that w/o a problem - i spend waaay too much time online - and i'v looked around those places too.

tbh, i'd never treat them as anymore than a place to get an easy ride or a place to experiment sexually (3 somes, dogging, S&M etc). its vaue in that sense is the anonimity and the guarentee that yuo are dealing with someone on the same wavlength.

otherwise - yeah - i say if you haven't been chatting to someone for a great deal of time - your in the same boat as you would have been IRL (then again my lines between IRL & online are somewhat less distinct than others.)

i have met up with a few ppl i met online - and hell, i might even attend our london meet, after i know they call it a computer but really its just a big phone right???

anyways - i cant resist popping this classic up (read: old as the hills):

DICTIONARY FOR WOMEN'S PERSONAL ADS:

>>40-ish.............................................49
>>Adventurous.................Slept with all your mates
>>Athletic......................................No tits
>>Average looking...............Has a face like an arse
>>Beautiful...........................Pathological liar
>>Contagious Smile..................Does a lot of pills
>>Educated....................Was f*cked to bits at Uni
>>Emotionally Secure......................On medication
>>Feminist..................Bad hair and no dress sense
>>Free spirit....................................Junkie
>>Friendship first..........................Former sl*t
>>Fun..........................................Annoying
>>Gentle...........................................Dull
>>Good Listener................................Autistic
>>New-Age............................Body hair problems
>>Old-fashioned..........................No BJs or anal
>>Open-minded.................................Desperate
>>Outgoing........................Loud and Embarrassing
>>Passionate...............................Sloppy drunk
>>Poet.......................................Depressive
>>Professional....................................Bitch
>>Romantic.......................................Frigid
>>Social.....................Fanny like a clowns pocket
>>Cuddly............................................Fat
>> Voluptuous...................................Very Fat
>>Large lady.................................Hugely Fat
>>Wants Soul mate...............................Stalker
>>Widow........................................Murderer

[Jaffa The Cake]

If I don't get to use "Fanny like a clowns pocket" during conversation today I'm gonna be pissed off.

[Lord Spong]

I've always thought this kind of thing was a bit sad, but It's recently aroused my curiosity.  .(...).

i also wanted to say, if your friend has found true love and is happy, you can not give yourself the right to judge it as sad just because you cant imagine yourself beeing in his shoes.

Heh heh.  You wouldn't say that if you'd met him!!

[Lord Spong]

If I don't get to use "Fanny like a clowns pocket" during conversation today I'm gonna be pissed off.

I've always preferred the saying 'fanny like a wizard's sleeve' myself.

[Cheese Arse H Christ]

Friends Reunited used to have a personals section in which I posted this:

Pantgasm
Caucasian Male, 34, Single

FU010382
Errr.. Liverpool, Liverpool, England





--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
General
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I am a little unconventional according to some of my friends.

By this I mean that I am frequently occasioned with disgust, , disgust at the way the modern world is falling apart due to a lack of self discipline and moral fibre. I harken back to the days of the British Empire and Queen Victoria, a time when being dour was something to be proud of and openly display.

I am fiercely strict with myself and expect no less in others.
I have a rigid moral framework from within which I can judge the disciplinary needs of others almost instantly.  
Gender:
Male

Age:
34 (10-Oct-1968)

Race:
Caucasian

Marital Status:
Single

Religion:
None

Drinking:
Light/social drinker

Smoking:
Light/Social Smoker

Food:
Non Vegetarian

Occupation:
Education & Science


Education:
Bachelors Degree

 
Languages:
English (Fluent)
French (Some)
German (Some)
Spanish (Minimal)

Interests
Computers / Internet
Movies / Cinema




--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Appearance
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I have the appearance of a well-to-do Victorian era megalomaniac mill owner. I am dark and satanic and have a large collection of top hats, monacles and canes with which to thrash the staff (below stairs of course, in front of the guests would be unthinkable)  
Eye Colour:
Hazel

Hair Colour:
Light brown

Body Type:
Ample

Height:
6'0" (183cm) or above



--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Looking For
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Someone who understands how important it is to discipline oneself and others. I also I have a rather prudish view of 'matters of the bedchamber' and so for me it is unthinkable to expect any future spouse to be anything but a vestal virgin most pure  
Gender:
Female

Age from:
18

Age to:
40

 Relationship:
Activity Partner
Friendship
Relationship
Romance
Casual




--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Last Visited: 18-Jan-03

and got a reply.

[Jemble Fred]

My brother gets married in July, all down to computer dating. Half of his friends have become affianced the same way. It's almost the fucking only way to find love in the 21st century. No one I know goes to pubs or clubs, (especially me, I'd rather pull my eyes out) and most peoiple don't even talk to each other any more, let alone flirt and date.

Except in episodes of 'Friends', perhaps.

[fanny splendid]

When's the divorce?

[MojoJojo]

A friend of mine bemoaned the lack of a dating cuture in this country. And he's right, you can't really go up to someone and ask for a date in the same way. I don't think either of you would know what to do.

Most people I know meet through friends and get drunk together a few times, then fall into bed drunly. The next day they emerge from the cocoon of the bedroom, blinking into the harsh light, reborn a couple.

[fanny splendid]

Hi Emma, do you fancy going to the cinema on Wednesday night?

Hmm, yes, okay.

fanny, aged thirteen.

[Lord Spong]

My brother gets married in July, all down to computer dating. Half of his friends have become affianced the same way. It's almost the fucking only way to find love in the 21st century. No one I know goes to pubs or clubs, (especially me, I'd rather pull my eyes out) and most peoiple don't even talk to each other any more, let alone flirt and date.

That's it.  It occured to me the other day that I wasn't getting any younger, and I never meet any new people.  All the women that I know are ones I've known for years, and I can see myself in exactly the same position ten years from now.  Action needs to be taken.

Of course, I imagine I'll go off the idea after a couple of days, just like most of the other fads I tend to go for.

[smoker]

Hi Emma, do you fancy going to the cinema on Wednesday night?

Hmm, yes, okay.

fanny, aged thirteen.

did you get your end away?

no

you did it wrong.

now back to your pc confidence boy

[12 years, 11 months old]

Hi Emma, do you fancy going to the cinema on Wednesday night?

Hmm, yes, okay..

So what did Emma say?

[fanny splendid]

Hi Emma, do you fancy going to the cinema on Wednesday night?
Hmm, yes, okay.
fanny, aged thirteen.

did you get your end away?
no
you did it wrong.
now back to your pc confidence boy

Ooooh, get you!


No, I didn't 'get my end away', but I did get a 'date', which was the whole point of the exercise, and this thread?.

If I had wanted to 'get my end away', I would have had a quiet word with one of my mother's, drug addled friends.