You know you're old when...

[Partridge's Love Child]

...your generation's Blue Peter presenters start dying*.



I was just about to start this when I discovered sproglette's post on this in t'other thread, but seen as that has been thankfully locked, I thought I'd plough on.

I didn't even know she was ill.  Apparently she nearly died as a teenager when the family home burnt down on Christmas Day.  She would've been killed by the backdraft as she opened the door, had she not fortutiously forgotten her keys.  Jesus, why do I know such a pointless story?

My bird took the piss out of me for ages because I fancied the arse off Caron Keating, despite the obvious family resemblence - the missus therefore took to telling everyone I had the hots for Gloria Hunniford.

I notice that Caron's nork-rot wasn't mentioned on Channel 5's light-hearted documentary The Curse of Blue Peter last year.  Cancer obviously a bit too near the nipple for that particular programme, perhaps, rather than laughing at the fact that Janet Ellis gave birth to a cat, and Richard Bacon shoved John Leslie up his nose.

When Janet Ellis dies I'll have to stop masturbating completely.

Anyway, may as well open this thread up a bit - what else makes you feel old, plus further tributes to Caron Keating...

* Probably wouldn't even say she was my generation's presenter.  She was a touch late for me.  More of a Simon Groom/Peter Duncan/Sarah Greene kid, me.

[Speciality meat product]

I'll 2nd that. I didn't even know she was ill. A complete surprise.

She was certainly my generations presenter. Didn't realise how attractive she was until I saw those photos on the BBC website.

Oh, and what makes me feel old? Still having a hangover after Mondays all day session.

[Evil Knevil]

I remember her. Damn.

Still the new batch are relatively fit. Albeit slightly too kiddy presenter.

[Pinball]

I'm a keen runner, and, well, it's getting farking hard to beat the increasing number of scrote runners you see around. And (to quote a classic phrase) they look so young nowadays! B'stards!

Why should you start to deteriorate from your 20s it's ridiculous. I should be able to defeat these upstarts!!!

[smoker]

like i said, i'm gutted. not only was she a honey, but she was always came across really nice and sincere, unlike some others such as turner and leslie.

i feel old when i go to the nightclub i went to every weekend when i was at sixth form, and realise it's full of this year's sixth form and i am by 5 years the oldest person in there. it's depressing. dead easy to pull though, win some lose some

[Marcus Or Relius]

You know you're old when some fuckin' bastard kids run past you, almost knocking you over, and you mutter "Fuckin' bastard kids!"

Also, when you realize it's been a decade since the suicide of the angst-ridden singer you listen to as a teenager.

Oh, and a bad sign is when 15-year-olds hanging outside off-licences come up to you, holding out a tenner freshly stolen from their mam's purse, and ask "Hey mister, can you or your son/daughter buy some White Lightning for us?."

[Rubbish Monkey]

What a depressing thread to read on your (my) birthday.

thanks.

I'll be in the pub if anyone wants me, sobbing gently into my beer and wondering where my life and youthful good looks have gone.

dammit i wasnt going to mention my birthday might as well start a thread ;-) Its Hitlar's birthday today too.

[@ssmaster]

You know when you are getting old when....

instead of recording music off TOTP you spend the whole programme shouting at it.

[Partridge's Love Child]

What a depressing thread to read on your (my) birthday.

You share it with my mate Dave, Sarah Michelle Gellar and Richie Blackmore.

I've recently started playing cricket again after six years out of whites.  It made me feel old to discover that I couldn't recapture former bowling glories on muscle memory, because my muscles have since got some sort of alzheimers disease and don't remember how to do it.  I've spent three seperate nets practices looking like a plonker as I struggle to get my arm over quick enough, get my feet right, my non-bowling arm up as a guide, get my body side-on etc etc.  Plus I ache like no one's business for days afterwards.

[smoker]

happy birthday adolf

so is she / was she mark durrrden-smith's sister then?

[@ssmaster]

happy birthday adolf

so is she / was she mark durrrden-smith's sister then?

She was Gloria Hunniford's daughter, you are thinking of Judith 'orange leather' Chalmers

[Partridge's Love Child]

Yeah, smoker, you thickie.

<Partridge hastily edits post so as not to look like a tit.>

[hencole]

You know you are getting old when you start playing golf on a weekly basis.

You know you are getting old when the people you buy draw off are the people you used to sell to.

[european son]

going to Hundred Reasons and The Libertines gigs make me feel old.

however, seeing the Buzzcocks and Kraftwerk makes me feel like a wee bairn again, so it's ups and downs.

[Neville Chamberlain]

You know you're getting old when your teeth fall out while taking a dump at 3 in the morning.

[MonkeyDrummer]

I felt old when I was telling my 24 year old flatmate about the Stuart Hall documentary posted and he didn't have a clue who I was talking about. Nor did he remember It's a Knockout. I've asked around, and no. No fucker else I know under 25 does either!!! Surely not!

[Miles Away Girl]

Were they false teeth?  If not, that was some cataclysmic dump! What had you been eating - Readymix Concrete?

[Miles Away Girl]

Were they false teeth?  If not, that was some cataclysmic dump! What had you been eating - Readymix Concrete?

[Cheese Arse H Christ]

You know you're getting old when your plums dangle in the water when you poo

[sproggy]

I was just about to start this when I discovered sproglette's post on this in t'other thread, but seen as that has been thankfully locked, I thought I'd plough on.

Glad to see my post had the desired effect.



You know you're old when you go out for your evening jog, and everyone points and laughs and the 'fat baldy nacker' gasping for breath so hard his pants are sucked up his own arse.

instead of recording music off TOTP you spend the whole programme shouting at it.

Shit, I've caught myself doing that to TOTP2!  I like to think It's more down to my pathological hatred of Steve Wright rather than my excessive years.

[El Unicornio, mang]

You know you're old when....

...you start handing out Werther's Original to your grandson in exchange for fellatio

[weekender]

I was corresponding with a certain un-named VW about some obscure 60s tunes that he had which I was after, and he referred to vinyl in his PM back to me.  As it happened, I hadn't referred to vinyl in any of our correspondence thus far, so I sent a message back along with a little PS which read:

PS What's a 45?

Imagine my immense delight when he responded back with a detailed description of what vinyl was, and what a 45 single was defined as.

I bet he felt fucking old then, the daft old git.

[untitled_london]

You know you're old when...

a) you read these threads

b) you sympathise with thesethreads

c) you put these types of  thread up

d) you reply in these threads

:(

[Silver SurferGhost]

You know you're getting old when you start making reference to it in EVERY FUCKING POST YOU MAKE. cough

..un-named VW...vinyl...detailed description of a 45...daft old git

I don't remember my description of what a 45 was being all that detailed......but then, I am old.
I also hadn't realised how unspeakably evil you are then either,
so I'll not be falling for that sort of malarkey again, Moriarty.

Oh. I just have...



This message would have been posted earlier if not for the crippling arthritis in my hands. And I also needed the toilet halfway through.
.

[fanny splendid]

You know you're still young when the whinging posts of twenty year olds mean nothing to you.

Hurrah!

[Ambient Sheep]

More of a Simon Groom/Peter Duncan/Sarah Greene kid, me.

I was a classic Noakes / Purves / Singleton chap me.  None of them are dead yet, thankfully.

I didn't know she was ill either, and until she died I didn't know she was GH's daughter.  Weird.

[TotalNightmare]

you know you are old when you have just celebrated a birthday were they havent been bothered to get you the right amount of birthday candles...

fucking HINT HINT

[Fucknose]

....when you start lying about your age, when your student mates talk about 'screamo' music and you dont know what the fuck they're on about....and when a hangover lasts all fucking week. grrrrrr

[hencole]

Screamo music?

[Partridge's Love Child]

I didn't know what "emo" was until recently, so I asked my friend.  When he told me, I nearly vomited.  As a result, I have no wish to discover what "screamo" is, so please keep it to yourself.