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March 28, 2024, 09:21:54 PM

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LEGEND GARY PART TWO

Started by Fambo Number Mive, August 28, 2019, 08:17:01 AM

Previous topic - Next topic

Glebe

Gary 'accuses' Daz of being transgender, "You've always had small hands mate!"

Glebe

"Sorry mate what did you just say?"

"I said you're in for it now mate. Nobody spills Aggressive Duncan's pi-OOOOOF!! Me fucking nose, you psycho!"

"Not so aggressive now, are we Dunc? You need anger management mate. I'll call an ambulance."

shoulders

Legend Gary locks Gabrielle in a shed 'but only until my battery charges up, apologies'.

Paul Calf

"You getting a leccy car, Gary?"

Gary's expression darkens:

"They kill birds, Daz."

Glebe

Gary has a set of gold clubs he never uses. "I hate golf Daz, but they're stolen so yay me."

Beagle 2

Legend Gary obtains a government subsidy to open up Legend Gary's Legendary Legend Dairy. "It's about accelerating climate change. In my own small way I want to troll planet earth any way I can".

Glebe

Quote from: Beagle 2 on April 08, 2022, 10:55:39 AMLegend Gary obtains a government subsidy to open up Legend Gary's Legendary Legend Dairy. "It's about accelerating climate change. In my own small way I want to troll planet earth any way I can".

He subsequently falls out with the herd.


shoulders

Legend Gary confuses going to Albania with somehow fiction and time travel.

Bum Flaps

Gary's been watching those scammer series on Netflix, and now he's got big plans.

For now he's just tippexed a big LG on the back of his phone, but tomorrow he's deffo going down natwest to get some funding for his big 'foundation'.

Blue Jam

Quote from: Beagle 2 on April 08, 2022, 10:55:39 AMLegend Gary obtains a government subsidy to open up Legend Gary's Legendary Legend Dairy. "It's about accelerating climate change. In my own small way I want to troll planet earth any way I can".

Legend Gary applies for series 2 of Gordon Ramsay's Future Food Stars. He gets disqualified after he is caught puncturing Gordo's lifejacket.

Glebe

Gary makes his own Squid Game by locking Daz in the shed with Jenga blocks.

jenna appleseed

Silly Garry's forgotten to collect the squids off of Squid Dave, again, hasn't he?

Fambo Number Mive

Steak Terry tells Gary and Daz how the sales lads' holiday was delayed when his suitcase full of steaks was not allowed on the plane, and he had to leave some with his wife.

Fambo Number Mive

Gary books four tickets for Davidson's new show but wants it in writing that there will be no snowflakes within 100 yards. "Run out of snowflake repellent, Daz".

Glebe

Quote from: Fambo Number Mive on April 11, 2022, 12:04:28 PMGary books four tickets for Davidson's new show but wants it in writing that there will be no snowflakes within 100 yards. "Run out of snowflake repellent, Daz".

"What about the wokes Gary?"

Gary snaps his fingers. "Good one Daz, you think of everything! I'll just have to bring a broom to keep them at bay. Nick-nick!"

wosl

Legend Gary makes a reusable covid mask out of the packaging from a Gillette Fusion5 ProGlide.

shoulders

Legend Gary says going to the arcades is gay. Then he goes to the arcades and wins money and he confirms going to the arcades is not gay.

shoulders

Legend Gary dresses as an elderly Moldovan lady and travels first class from Southport to Warwick to beg for coins, sniggering every inch of the way.

Fambo Number Mive

Gary becomes an "auditor" and barges into local jobcentres and libraries demanding to be able to film.

king_tubby

Legend Gary goes on the Man Utd Glazer protest.



'And the best thing, Daz, I haven't even fucking supported them since 2013'

Blue Jam

Quote from: shoulders on April 16, 2022, 11:44:04 AMLegend Gary dresses as an elderly Moldovan lady and travels first class from Southport to Warwick to beg for coins, sniggering every inch of the way.

Legend Gary beats the Moldovans at tennis.

Glebe

Gary buys MySpace for £2.

Pink Gregory

Quote from: Glebe on April 17, 2022, 12:45:29 AMGary buys MySpace for £2.
"Two pound more than it was worth, Daz mate, I feel a right mug."

"Maybe so, Gary, maybe so."

Gary resolves to deliver Daz's obligatory knuckle sandwich later.

Fambo Number Mive

Gary and Daz are now offering their own NFTs. So far, only the photo of them standing on the tables in the Spoons at Edinburgh had had any bids.

Paul Calf

Soft Baz makes $500,000 on the ICO of his coin, titled  RimCoin, illustrated with a .png of Gary and Daz in the photo that was anonymously submitted to Viz's Up-The-Arse Corner.

"This will not fucking stand, Daz," Gary thunders, "It will not fucking stand at all."

shoulders

Legend Gary asks why so many people call him 'the self-styled master of disaster'.

Glebe

Gary sells MySpace to Larval Trauma Flashbacks for 50p. "I'm counting myself lucky Daz."

shoulders

'Happy to get shot of it, not least to that melm'

Glebe

Gary describes Daz's head as being "roughly the circumference of a medium-sized otter."

shoulders

Legend Gary has abs in his arse due to what he describes as 'a regime'