Football Thread 2021/22: pre-seasons in the abyss

[badaids]

That's only the three cuts to my arm then. Progress, I guess.

Don't do that, those clueless oafs aren't worth it.

[Kankurette]

Hence the edit. I'm just so fucking sick and tired of it. How do you stop caring about football? I've tried and tried and I don't even know how.

[JamesTC]

The bad times hopefully make the good times all the better. After a bad result, just look ahead for the good times that will hopefully come.

[Kankurette]

Thanks for not being a cunt and laughing at me. I genuinely do appreciate that.

The depressing thing is, I thought I was past self-harming when Everton lose since I didn't do it last weekend, and then tonight happened.

[JamesTC]

The depressing thing is, I thought I was past self-harming when Everton lose since I didn't do it last weekend, and then tonight happened.

It is the Kinder Egg Cup. You've still started the season well and only had one bad result in the league which was down to injuries. Keep your head up.

[badaids]

Thanks for not being a cunt and laughing at me. I genuinely do appreciate that.

The depressing thing is, I thought I was past self-harming when Everton lose since I didn't do it last weekend, and then tonight happened.

Like Has been said. The start to the season has been okay, relatively and who gives a toss about the Carabao. Getting in a state over these players who in the main are dinnae gie a shite cowards is not worth it. Draw a picture of Tosuns face on orange and then stamp on it instead.

[bgmnts]

Once you realise you are just watching 22 grossly overpaid twats run around, fall on the floor playacting they were hurt and sometimes kicking a ball, it becomes very easy to detach yourself from caring about football.

For me anyway, thankfully.

[chveik]

please don't harm yourself for fucking football. just find a team that's doing worse and revel in their misery

[jamiefairlie]

Once you realise you are just watching 22 grossly overpaid twats run around, fall on the floor playacting they were hurt and sometimes kicking a ball, it becomes very easy to detach yourself from caring about football.

For me anyway, thankfully.

Yeah, it comes with age, you realise they're all cunts and seasons come and go faster and faster and even world cups seem to be every year. They used to be a real events but now I can barely remember the 21st century ones.

[Shoulders?-Stomach!]

please don't harm yourself for fucking football.

Seconded, thirded, a millionthed. If you pick Everton for this dynamic you're going to end up in hospital.

[Bernice]

Yeah, please don't hurt yourself Kank. Everton will have the same season they always have: good performances bringing the joy and optimism, inexplicable shite making you question why you bother. Spoilers: we finish between 7th and 11th, dropping out of domestic competitions sometime before the semis. It was ever this, it will be ever thus.

"Are Everton any good?" and "Are Everton total shit, then?" are two parts of a zen koan, a study in duality and oneness. Individual results are meaningless to the whole.

[king_tubby]

https://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/football/58649432

Derby docked 12 points. Dammit.

[Head Gardener]

coming to the Premier League soon no doubt : https://twitter.com/i/status/1437103615634726916

[Shoulders?-Stomach!]

Morris told me exclusively on Sunday that there is a failure of profit and sustainability rules in the recalculated documents following the amortisation saga, which in turn could lead to more points being taken off.

Yikes.

If there aren't any more points reductions and they find a buyer (surely they will) I still fancy Derby to stay up. They're hardly miles behind the 5 teams above them even with the points knocked off and have a whole season to claw it back.

[JamesTC]

That panther looks shit. Palace have an actual fucking Eagle. West Brom have an actual boiler walking around. Partick Thistle have the actual sun pulled down from the heavens to support the team on the sidelines.

[Inspector Norse]

Mixed-reality you what mate

Looks about as groundbreaking as Atmosfear

[Echo Valley 2-6809]

Yikes.

If there aren't any more points reductions and they find a buyer (surely they will) I still fancy Derby to stay up. They're hardly miles behind the 5 teams above them even with the points knocked off and have a whole season to claw it back.

You hate to see the lads' heads drop when they go 1-0 down.

[Head Gardener]

my teen just showed me that you can make anything appear on your phone in about 5 seconds then he showed me penguins in my front room, so I'm not so impressed with a prancing panther now. However I'm quite looking forward to the West Brom mascot doing it's erm, thing

[DrGreggles]

Yikes.

If there aren't any more points reductions and they find a buyer (surely they will) I still fancy Derby to stay up. They're hardly miles behind the 5 teams above them even with the points knocked off and have a whole season to claw it back.

There'll be at least another 9 points deducted.

[WhoMe]

Currently smashing Wolves second string. Spurs are BACK.

[Captain Z]

Really fancy some Milka chocolate...

[JamesTC]

my teen just showed me that you can make anything appear on your phone in about 5 seconds then he showed me penguins in my front room, so I'm not so impressed with a prancing panther now. However I'm quite looking forward to the West Brom mascot doing it's erm, thing

The way energy prices are rising, AR boilers are probably a more realistic proposition for our future homes than real ones.

[Kankurette]

The article about Koeman on the BBC is giving me schadenfreude. Also Rodriguez has gone to Qatar. So much for him following Ancelotti.

That panther looks shit. Palace have an actual fucking Eagle. West Brom have an actual boiler walking around. Partick Thistle have the actual sun pulled down from the heavens to support the team on the sidelines.

Cambridge have a skip. No offence to Marvin the Moose, but the skip is the real mascot. It just needs a pair of googly eyes stuck to it.

That hammer thing that West Ham have is surprisingly cute, as is Mighty Red even though I keep thinking he's a lobster.

[Mobius]

Currently smashing Wolves second string. Spurs are BACK.

Mate it's 2-2

[JamesTC]

Mate it's 2-2

Spurs are BACK!

[Kankurette]

Mate it's 2-2

Spurs'd.

[Mobius]

Hope it goes to pelanties.

The Arsenal game isn't on telly, anywhere in the world. Watching a live stream on twitter, just some bloke in the stands with his phone.

[TrenterPercenter]

Chelsea have had to bring Lukkaku on against Villa's second team.  Lols.

[WhoMe]

Spurs are BACK!

They never left, the cunts

[TrenterPercenter]

Ha! Well that's throughly pissed off Chelsea - making them play ET with there star striker on and a pram game in 3 days.

EDIT: Ignore me I'm an idiot didn't realise it was straight to pens