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Desolation: The Malignant Seven

Started by Ferris, February 21, 2022, 03:00:48 PM

Previous topic - Next topic

madhair60

Your daughter falls in with a bad crowd and adopts the identity "Cyberslut"

Ferris


Fishfinger

Saturday and, oof, I don't know, sometimes you just can't resurrect a rodent, or suck off a monkey, without a BBC camera crew ruining the moment in hi-def.

shoulders

Your stint as a Jesuit scribe births the maxim 'turn that frown upside down'.

Chicory

Accidentally getting cast in a production entitled 'The Midwich Cuckold'.

Chicory

Deliberately getting cast in a production entitled 'The Midwich Cuckold'.

Ferris

A non-zero amount of your brain is taken up by Steve Penk.

shoulders

The direction of the wind displeases you greatly today, and so you set fire to the seneschal's knees.

pancreas

Yet another top-notch placenta ends up in the bin, despite its having definitely been pledged to you during a scat & heroin debauch.

Glebe

I've never been to Berkshire and it could be a really nice place for all I know but just to inform you that it is currently the place to be I'd you want your balls crushed by an irate dragon.

Glebe

Last bus breaks down 20 miles from your stop in the swampy confines if what can only be described as 'arseville'.

shoulders

Your pug's cataracted eye juice contaminates your cauldron of food bank slop.

Ferris

Forced to attend one of Eddie Marsan's dinner parties.


touchingcloth

You begin a fully physical relationship with your latest shart.

Glebe

Monday, 4AM, translating The Silmarillion into Klingon.

Fishfinger

#466
Adorned with the chin of an ancestor.

Smelly old people want to touch it.

Fishfinger

A stand-up routine to stave off starvation begins with a bit about missing socks.

Fishfinger

Quote from: Glebe on July 03, 2022, 04:59:30 PMMonday, 4AM, translating The Silmarillion into Klingon.
Unaware of this unannounced event, the many adherents of the 4AM club are forced to sit around wanking, or widdling I think it's called, and/or generating Dungeons & Dragons characters.

Ferris

I have read the Silmarillion at 4am during those early days of parenting where you go slightly mad. Not my favourite read-through it I'm honest.

Glebe


bgmnts

I'm reading it now. I've read far more desolate books.


Ferris

It's good! Lots of clever allegories and parallels to British and welsh mythology. You have to be somewhat into the legendarium but it's a book for proper nerds so it's a bit self-selecting.

Glebe

I've attempted to read it twice and failed.

Ferris

Some nerd you are!

I voluntarily read mythology pages on wikipedia and the Hobbit/LotR trilogy were some of the first "proper" books I read so it's right up my alley.

Ferris

Quote from: Ferris on July 04, 2022, 12:48:05 AMI voluntarily read mythology pages on wikipedia and the Hobbit/LotR trilogy were some of the first "proper" books I read so it's right up my alley.

desolation (of Smaug)

bgmnts

I bought the Iliad once thinking it would make me cleverer and lasted 3 pages. I use it as a stand to put my xbox on.

Deso.

Ferris

Also bought it, never read it. Mrs Ferris said it's not easy going and she's mad into books so that's her way of saying it's shite.

I don't reckon we're missing out and it's however many thousand fucking pages. Who has the time (apart from my wife I suppose).

bgmnts

I am going to try and self perform it whilst reading it, how Homer would have wanted it consumed.

Alone. To myself. In my room.

Fishfinger

"Unfinished Tales" is (are?) great. The title is unappetising but, deceptively, it does contain finished tales. The story of Turin Turambar is worth it alone, in my reckoning. If you care about this stuff.