A serial lawbreaking liar - Alexander Boris de Pfeffel Johnson scandal thread 2

[Bennett Brauer]

Prisoner 34299 Andy Coulson's probably right - 'Stand by for the fastest Prime Ministerial memoir in history'

Boris Johnson knows it's over. He may not have voiced it yet, but he knows. Aside from the relentless accumulation of self-inflicted crises, you cannot lose a chancellor and a health secretary within ten minutes of each other — not to mention a party chairman days earlier — and remain in office.

The greased piglet is now on a one-way journey to the Westminster slaughterhouse. But Johnson is and always has been a journalist (or, less generously, a spinner of yarns) first and a politician second. That gift for persuasive storytelling made him a brilliantly effective campaigner but, it turns out, utterly unsuited to the business of governing.

And true to type he will now be seeing the closing scenes of his performance as PM in headline-shaping, narrative-building terms. In other words: what's the story I'll be telling (and hopefully reading in the papers that matter to me) on the other side, which will set me up for the brightest and most lucrative future?

The answer, he may well have concluded, is to be ousted rather than to resign. There's less drama and money in honour and decency will, I suspect, be his calculation. No, far better to selectively rewrite the history of his time in office and say "the idiots did me in" rather than concede: "I got it wrong." That is what lay behind his brazen PMQs bombast that he had an overwhelming mandate to "keep going".

https://www.thetimes.co.uk/article/stand-by-for-the-fastest-prime-ministerial-memoir-in-history-q5x70ng56

Which is why I think he's probably enjoying most of this and looking forward to all that autobiography bunce and people misremembering him as AGBOL.

[imitationleather]

Perfect punchline.

[Psybro]

Watching Dan Hodges get what he paid for is like watching a baby first witnessing bubble bath in action.

[Mister Six]

Like Priti Patel is the only thing standing in the way of someone nuking us.

I dunno, if she stands head on...

[Alberon]

This is absolutely barking. Government is paralysed.

Johnson has no chance, but fighting on.

Utter madness.

[Mobius]

42 resignations

Hope we get to 69

[Zetetic]

The "it's not if he goes, it's when" stuff is extremely irritating.

[Crenners]

This is good but these self-serving rats should all be (politically) drowned, too. They've known for a long long time what he is and the culture he's enabled but it's only at this final no-choice moment that they pretend to present any principle or integrity whatsoever. Fuck em all forever.

[Urinal Cake]

Does Boris have any friends? Somebody should do a wellness check on him.

[jobotic]

Some member of the public on BBC News just said

"there's no one else who can look after the country the way Boris does"

Just fucking what

[idunnosomename]

someone said will he end up on GB News or Talk TV?

hell no. he needs real money. especially since he'll have to pay off Carrie in their imminent divorce. why the fuck will she care when he's not big boss boris anymore? she might as well go back with Harry Cole

[idunnosomename]

Some member of the public on BBC News just said

"there's no one else who can look after the country the way Boris does"

Just fucking what

that was some old boomer lady in Richmond (Yorks) I recall. it is crazy how "Boris" has just got some people to believe he's brilliant even though he can barely maintain the conservative status quo or tuck his own shirt in

[Cold Meat Platter]

Any good Downfall parodies? Or is that too uld skool?

https://twitter.com/MrJonDePlume/status/1544771621566746627

[JamesTC]

Does Boris have any friends? Somebody should do a wellness check on him.

Gazza has turned up to Downing Street with a fishing rod and chicken.

[ImmaculateClump]

When I was getting my tea one of the doddering speak your brains types goes "You can say what you like, but he got us through the covid" :D
nearly choked on my honey-roast potatoes⟨™⟩

[Wonderful Butternut]

Obviously it'll amount to no real change whether Bojo goes today, tomorrow or never, but there is a certain joy in watching them turn on each other like a pack of Ferengi.

[buttgammon]

Gazza has turned up to Downing Street with a fishing rod and chicken.

"Bozza it's me, Gazza". Unfortunately, lacking an even rudimentary knowledge of football, Johnson doesn't know who he is and closes the curtains.

[Zetetic]

Setting aside the entertainment value, I think many of us might be far better off with an increasingly deranged populist Johnson government than a more presentable Sunak one.

Would be interesting to see what battles the former ended up having with the parliamentary Tory party.

(Or this might just be liberal silliness on my part thinking that the fascists are worth a shot for a bit.)

[idunnosomename]

is this going to go on all night like an election?

[Alberon]

No, this is going to last another week.

[Cold Meat Platter]

Lawrence Jesterton has resigned.

[Butchers Blind]

2am : Boris is seen dragging a large black bag into the No10 garden.

[Beagle 2]

I'd resign at midnight exactly, all cool like. And I'd do it in blood and draw a spider on it.

[Goldentony]

get the gear in, get fucking

[Cold Meat Platter]

Ban Danna has resigned.

[The Late Mike Morris]

Some member of the public on BBC News just said

"there's no one else who can look after the country the way Boris does"

Just fucking what

This fucking country

[greencalx]

Simon Hart-less.

[Wonderful Butternut]

Grand.

[Unfundibulum]

its all too beautiful

[shoulders]

Setting aside the entertainment value, I think many of us might be far better off with an increasingly deranged populist Johnson government than a more presentable Sunak one.

Would be interesting to see what battles the former ended up having with the parliamentary Tory party.

(Or this might just be liberal silliness on my part thinking that the fascists are worth a shot for a bit.)

Oh, I've spent the day wrangling with that.

Competent malice or Incompetent malice that shores up power with social concessions?