Only Fools and Horses but it’s post-apocalypse

[Ferris]

The bit in terminator 2 where that one is chasing after the car and hooks onto the back, but it's Mickey Pearce.

[idunnosomename]

Planet of the Apes but instead of apes its lots of Uncle Alberts

[jobotic]

Boycie wears an eye patch.

Trigger wears a spiked eye patch. First time he put it on it was inside out. That's why he wears an eye patch.

[kalowski]

Del Boy: Boycie is a Jaffa. Well, we all are after the radiation posioning.

[Mr Farenheit]

...and Lennard Pearce shook hands with Hitler (though "regretted not killing him").

You mean Mickey Pearce?

[Fambo Number Mive]

Del Boy charges one pint of water or one can of food for access to the only undamaged blow up doll left following the nuclear blast. Rodney has to wipe it clean in between uses and he is running out of sponges. The line stretches down  what was Peckham High Street.

Rodney watches as Alan Parry comes in for his daily shag of the blow up doll. If he can find some more tobacco, maybe he can bribe Albert to wipe up Alan's cum and piss using his beard.

[Ferris]

Planet of the Apes but instead of apes its lots of Uncle Alberts

Get your hands off me you damn dirty merchant navy sailor!

Also they all worship a giant unexploded chandelier.

[Ferris]

You plonkers! You blew it up! Ah, damn you! God damn you all to Zeebrugge Hull!

[phes]

Everybody's dead Dave

Underrated

[Mr Farenheit]

[Glebe]

Nice one F!

[Mr Farenheit]

[kalowski]

Utterly brilliant.

[Ferris]

Planète des singes, Rodders!

[idunnosomename]

Oh my God! I was wrong! It was Peckham! All along!

You've finally made a plonker
Yes you've finally made a plonker
You've finally made a plonker out of me!

[Mr Farenheit]

[Fambo Number Mive]

After a business disagreement, Del fights Boycie in the Plonkerdome.

[Glebe]

Mr F killing it again!

[Huxleys Babkins]

Fish, and plankton. And sea greens, and protein from the sea. It's all here, ready. Fresh as harvest day. Fish and sea greens, and David Bowie LP's
Pool games, gold chains, wosnames and at a push
Some Trevor Francis track-suits, deep grottos whisper my name, Box... Box... Box... Box... Box... Box... Box...
No income tax, no VAT
This is a link to Sanctuary
Black or white, rich or poor
You won't get close to 34
God bless sea protein
Viva sea protein
Long live sea protein
C'est magnifique sea protein
Magnifique sea protein

[Fambo Number Mive]

"I asked for an Emperor burger, he gave me human flesh"

[Fambo Number Mive]

Del and Rodney roam the Wasteland (most of South London including Peckham) in their three wheeled van, wearing the tattered remnants of their Batman and Robin costumes and deal out "judgement".

Meanwhile inside Mega City Four (Lewisham) Judges Slater and Hoskins are dispatched by Chief Judge Boyce in order to hunt down Del Boy and Rodney. They ride out on their push bikes into the Wasteland, trying to avoid mutants, Uncle Albert talking about "during the third world war" and hipsters pretending that Instagram had managed to survive a nuclear war. 

[Ferris]

Del and Rodney roam the Wasteland (most of South London including Peckham) in their three wheeled van, wearing the tattered remnants of their Batman and Robin costumes and deal out "judgement".

And then the apocalypse happened, which just made everything worse.

[Huxleys Babkins]

Alan Parry wolfs down a ton of jellied Daleks.

[Glebe]

DEL: Oh no we've smashed the chandelier!

ROD: Fuck the chandelier we are living in a post-apocalyptic irradiated wasteland.

[Rolf Lundgren]

DEL: I remember Mum on her deathbed saying "You take care of little Rodney" and I always have done. Who looked after you when you fell off your bike near The Contamination Quarter? Who sorted the school bully out when he stole your PeckhamCoin credits? Who overloaded the circuits of the PoliceTron 5000 when you were interrogated for wacky baccy?

[Glebe]

DEL: Harry ap Rodney we gotta get dahn dah markeh foh moah hilarious escapades!

ROD: Except no because we now reside in a dystopian hinterland Derek.

[Ferris]

I've seen things you people wouldn't believe.

Three-wheeled vans on fire off the Peckham market. I watched Batman and Robin glitter in the dark near the Nag's Head. All those moments will be lost in time, like tears in rain.

Time... to fall through the bar.

[Ferris]

Del is flogging hooky Soylent Green he bought from a bloke in a pub.

[frajer]

Rodders spray-paints his face and lashes himself to the bonnet of the Reliant so he can live eternal, cosmic and chrome.

[Rolf Lundgren]

Boycie welds every car on his lot together to form one, massive metal car that takes up four lanes. From every window, a snarling punk spins a mace. They call this vehicle "Hell Bastard".