Frank Turner

[iamcoop]

This is unquestionably one of the least good things to ever take place

Wonder if he still does this one live?

[sevendaughters]

The stuff about one of his parents being trans probably led to the ill-fated Record For Women I Found on Wikipedia, which is at least interesting.

[jobotic]

This thread has made me hate music.

I'm enjoying the Starmer thread more.

[The Mollusk]

Love the comments on that Laura Marling song arguing the age borders of paedophilia and one guy "technically it's ephebophilia and perfectly natural", ignoring the notion that it might be just the slightest bit fucking weird and creepy to be a 26 year old bloke writing a song about fancying a schoolgirl.

[king_tubby]

"technically it's ephebophilia and perfectly natural"

People who say things like that can also rattle off the age of consent in every S.E. Asian country.

[iamcoop]

That's the first time I've ever heard Beans on Toast and I'm glad my instincts were proven right - he regularly plays the Cluny in Newcastle and every time I've seen one of his shows advertised I've immediately thought "Anyone that calls themselves Beans on Toast must be a massive cunt that makes absolute bin-tier music for complete fucking dickheads" and wow was I spot on.

[Eggy Mess]

There was a time when I couldn't log into Facebook without having a Beans On Toast sponsored 'wacky' ad pushed in my face. Never clicked on them, for similar reasons to those outlined by iamcoop above.

I got the impression he was trying to push himself as a Jeffrey Lewis type character, while clearly not even worthy of sharpening ol' Jeff's pencil.

That Laura Marling song is just astonishingly awful. What the fuck

[iamcoop]

He's usually on those provincial "family friendly" festival line ups that have similarly horrendously named acts on the bill like "Colonel Mustard & the Dijon Five", and they're nearly always headlined by Shed Seven or Craig Charles and his funk and soul revue.

[PaulTMA]

I think we need to make it xmas number 1 to teach him a lesson

[iamcoop]

Imagine hearing that song for the first time and discovering that your favourite artist, Beans on Toast, is an actual paedophile that has definitely had sex with underage people and almost certainly possesses a huge cache of sexually explicit images of minors.

[Dr M1nx PhD]

Presumably it's "outlaw" English folk because being a massive nonce is illegal.

[PaulTMA]

um (warning: slurz)
https://www.reddit.com/r/FolkPunk/comments/47pqbg/hes_not_one_to_mince_his_words_beans_on_toast/

Presumably ironic in some way but fuck's sake

[Kankurette]

There was a time when I couldn't log into Facebook without having a Beans On Toast sponsored 'wacky' ad pushed in my face. Never clicked on them, for similar reasons to those outlined by iamcoop above.

I got the impression he was trying to push himself as a Jeffrey Lewis type character, while clearly not even worthy of sharpening ol' Jeff's pencil.

That Laura Marling song is just astonishingly awful. What the fuck

I made it through a few seconds and had to stop. Awful.

[mrpupkin]

Accidentally seen Beans on Toast TWICE at festivals, can confirm worst shit ever. Imagine Super Hans with one of those little Ed Sheeran guitars but it's not a joke and people are whooping and saying that it's good. I'm sure there was a song saying hey guys why don't Israel and Palestine just have a big spliff together for once.

[The Mollusk]

There's very few enjoyable examples of blokes with acoustic guitars thinking they're funny but this is one of them.

He also did The Reefer Song though, so... Yeah.

[Dr M1nx PhD]

um (warning: slurz)
https://www.reddit.com/r/FolkPunk/comments/47pqbg/hes_not_one_to_mince_his_words_beans_on_toast/

Presumably ironic in some way but fuck's sake

That and his nonce song were both on his debut album, produced by a member of Mumford & Sons, Ben Lovett. The album also features guest vocals by Francisk Turner.

[Indomitable Spirit]

um (warning: slurz)
https://www.reddit.com/r/FolkPunk/comments/47pqbg/hes_not_one_to_mince_his_words_beans_on_toast/

Presumably ironic in some way but fuck's sake

This is incredible. Just imagining him singing this in the Smugglers Tent at Kelburn Garden Party with a big grin on my face

[king_tubby]

There's very few enjoyable examples of blokes with acoustic guitars thinking they're funny but this is one of them.

He also did The Reefer Song though, so... Yeah.

God damn, I've not heard that for about 30 yrs.

[king_tubby]

10 week's rent for 150 quid.

[Steve Faeces]

Accidentally seen Beans on Toast TWICE at festivals, can confirm worst shit ever. Imagine Super Hans with one of those little Ed Sheeran guitars but it's not a joke and people are whooping and saying that it's good. I'm sure there was a song saying hey guys why don't Israel and Palestine just have a big spliff together for once.

It's The War on War. Someone I know through CND recommended it to me as a song they thought summed up the problems in the world and what could be done. You can judge below,

Take the boom-box out of boom town and put it in the Gaza Strip and get my mate Mike to DJ it and drop some heavy shit
And maybe, just maybe, everyone will come and dance, pass a couple of pills around and they might even forget about the past
Well if that sounds like a fucking stupid ignorant idea, if anybody out there's got a better one, baby I'm all ears

Risible nonsense. He would have been in his mid 30s when he wrote this.

[king_tubby]

jfc

[PaulTMA]

He was also in Stewart Lee's top 8 friends on Myspace

[Indomitable Spirit]

Take the boom-box out of boom town and put it in the Gaza Strip and get my mate Mike to DJ it and drop some heavy shit
And maybe, just maybe, everyone will come and dance, pass a couple of pills around and they might even forget about the past
Well if that sounds like a fucking stupid ignorant idea, if anybody out there's got a better one, baby I'm all ears

Labour amendment to SNP ceasefire motion causes uproar

[jobotic]

McAllister started performing as Beans On Toast in London in 2005, primarily at the Holloway Road pub Nambucca, where he lived and worked at the time.

Beans On Toast has performed at the Glastonbury Festival every year since 2007. He supported Kate Nash at London's Hammersmith Apollo in 2008, before releasing his debut 50-track double album Standing On A Chair in 2009.[3] Produced by Ben Lovett of Mumford & Sons, it featured guest vocals by Emmy The Great, Frank Turner and members of The Holloways, amongst others.

Mmmm that's a scene I wish I'd been part of.

[Kankurette]

Totally Mexico, yeah?

[SteveDave]

50 tracks? Wowwww

[Dr M1nx PhD]

50 tracks? Wowwww

You think that's bad? Wait until you see what the tracks are called:

The Price Of Rice   
Don't Believe The Bullshit   
M.D.M.Amazing   
Whatever Happened To The Rubicks Cube?   
The Peaches Of Wandsworth   
The Pub In Holloway   
Why Did The Chicken Cross The Road?   
This Side Of The Fence   
An Afternoon With Henry Rollins   
The Seaside In Springtime   
Dirty p**i   
Wave Goodbye To EMI   
Fancy Dress Frisbee   
Health And Safety   
No Fit Girls In NYC   
Coke   
Media Circus   
Fuck The Smoking Ban   
The Search For Fats Domino   
Binge Drinker   
Myspace Picture   
London At War   
Hippy Crack   
I Ain't That Old Sunshine   
Lake District   
Convenience Killed The Kids   
Girlfriend In The Jungle   
I Shot Tupac Shakur And All I Got Was This Lousy T-Shirt   
The Great Big Fucking Hole   
New Computer   
My Names Jay And I Am An Alcoholic   
Junkfood Sex   
Kate Moss Birthday Party   
Bird Flu Blues   
How Great Was Emmy?   
Eggs Benadict   
You Fat Bastard   
Thanks For Fucking Up The World For Us   
Flower In A Council Estate   
The Big Goodbye   
Saddam   
Can't Buy Me Love   
The History Of Art   
Valentine   
The Day That Dance Music Died   
I Fancy Laura Marling   
Money Money Money   
Alice McAllister   
Braintree   
I'm Wearing The Clothes I Found On Your Throne

[SteveDave]

I just exhaled myself inside out

[Pink Gregory]

not quite Anal Cunt is it

[Kankurette]

He can't even punctuate.