Road House (2024) - remake with Jake Gyllenhaal

[madhair60]

McGregor is Irish, and there is nothing the Irish love more than protecting and enabling rapists.
Both Catholics and Prods.

steady on

[Sebastian Cobb]

Read a popbitch thing recently that suggested that Connor and his pals drag a table and chairs into their local's jacks so they can have their own private room.

[George White]

He owns a pub, he's a real notorious (no pun intended) landlord.
Forced several long-standing businesses out, by upping the rents increasingly.

[phantom_power]

The original is very odd. Dalton is all spiritual and "no-one wins a fight" but then when he gets angry he can't help ripping people's throats out. At the end apparently he is healed because he doesn't rip Gazzara's throat out but then laughs along as the other characters shoot him to bits. The police come in and as everyone says they didn't see anything (and one of them stashed the guns.....somewhere?), they don't seem to care how the town bigwig was murdered with multiple weapons.

He is meant to be this hard-ass second-best bouncer in the area (state? country? world?) and yet he keeps getting his arse handed to him. And we are supposed to believe that loads of people know the top rankings of bouncers as well. Oh and Dalton knows the band at the bar despite never having been in the town before

It is fun but it is a bag of bollocks and the Robocop comparison above is spurious I think because that is a genuinely excellent film whereas this is fun because of how detached from reality and ridiculous it is

[dissolute ocelot]

If Liman is boycotting this, then I think we should do likewise. At least until something bad happens to Macgregor. Gyllenhaal is a great actor but he's just not pretty enough, and should be playing psychotic villains not zen-based doormen. And Liman has made some very entertaining movies (Edge of Tomorrow, Go) but also a fair number of duller films (and some I can't decide about, were Bourne Identity or Mr and Mrs Smith actually good?).

[Famous Mortimer]

@phantom power, he knows the band because they both work the same circuit. And he "loses" a fight to a large group (booze delivery), and takes a bit of a whupping from Marshall Teague, who's obviously a well trained fighter. He's not a superhero.

That people know him is odd, I'll admit. Maybe Tilghman mentioned him multiple times to the staff before he was hired.

I assume with the end, that the cops were happy he wasn't around any more, so no-one really bothered investigating.

The very last scene (picnic, river, swimming) is clearly supposed to be earlier in the film - they're dressed the same and have a picnic basket during the monster truck scene. I'd like to know what the original ending was.

[Jim_MacLaine]

I assume with the end, that the cops were happy he wasn't around any more, so no-one really bothered investigating.

Kind of tenuously echoes the real life case of town bully Ken McElroy.

In 1981, Ken McElroy — the "town bully" of Skidmore, Missouri — was shot and killed in broad daylight. McElroy had terrorised the town for years. He was killed on a busy afternoon in the middle of town — dozens claimed that they hadn't seen a thing. To this day, no one has been charged.

[Famous Mortimer]

Did not know that - maybe that's why they set it in Jasper, Missouri, despite the movie having a boat store in town (no significant body of water within a four hour drive of the real Jasper), and there being mountains in one shot (Missouri is flat as a pancake).

[phantom_power]

@phantom power, he knows the band because they both work the same circuit. And he "loses" a fight to a large group (booze delivery), and takes a bit of a whupping from Marshall Teague, who's obviously a well trained fighter. He's not a superhero.

That people know him is odd, I'll admit. Maybe Tilghman mentioned him multiple times to the staff before he was hired.

I assume with the end, that the cops were happy he wasn't around any more, so no-one really bothered investigating.

The very last scene (picnic, river, swimming) is clearly supposed to be earlier in the film - they're dressed the same and have a picnic basket during the monster truck scene. I'd like to know what the original ending was.

But the band seem to just play that bar every night. And everyone seem to know Dalton's name, even the customers. And they know Sam Elliott's character as well

As for the fights he is supposed to be the baddest MF around (or second-baddest) but he is a pretty crap fighter all told. Certainly not deserving of his legendary status, and never really seems to put into use all the training shit he does. You never see him carrying out his three rules either. None of the fights occur outside for one.

And how do they keep replacing those tables that keep getting broken

I can't work out if it is a film with too many re-writes or not enough. Either way the whole character arc and message of the film (for want of a better word) is very confused. Kelly Lynch is repulsed by Dalton's throat rip, though you could make a good case that it was kill or be killed, and then pretty much forgives him for no reason other than he doesn't rip someone else's throat out. I am not sure that is conclusive proof that he is over his throat-ripping habit

[Famous Mortimer]

But the band seem to just play that bar every night. And everyone seem to know Dalton's name, even the customers. And they know Sam Elliott's character as well

Jeff Healey makes a reference to this being "just like Dayton" at one point, indicating they've both travelled. And the customers don't know his name, because after he breaks up a fight, Healey says "the name is Dalton". When Wade Garrett shows up at the Double Deuce, none of the staff recognise him except Tilghman, and Healey - again - introduces him after the fight.

As for the fights he is supposed to be the baddest MF around (or second-baddest) but he is a pretty crap fighter all told. Certainly not deserving of his legendary status, and never really seems to put into use all the training shit he does. You never see him carrying out his three rules either. None of the fights occur outside for one.

Apart from the one right at the beginning, when he's still working that other bar, and the one where the guy has the knife in his boot. And Jack (the big guy) seems to blossom under Dalton's tutelage.

Again, he's not a superhero, but he kicks a lot of ass. I really feel like you're barking up the wrong tree with that one. He's trying to stop fights from happening, which is a large part of the cooler's job.

And how do they keep replacing those tables that keep getting broken

My theory on how Brad Wesley became rich, is he got in the business of supplying tables to dive bars.

I can't work out if it is a film with too many re-writes or not enough. Either way the whole character arc and message of the film (for want of a better word) is very confused. Kelly Lynch is repulsed by Dalton's throat rip, though you could make a good case that it was kill or be killed, and then pretty much forgives him for no reason other than he doesn't rip someone else's throat out. I am not sure that is conclusive proof that he is over his throat-ripping habit

Or maybe, after the Wesley stuff, she changed her mind on the kill-or-be-killed thing?

I think you're maybe expecting a bit too much logical rigour from the dive bar bouncer movie. I like bar work being seen as a career to the point where staff at a place in Jasper, MO know who the best bouncer is and what he did in Memphis. I wonder why Wesley, if he was so desperate to give Pat McGurn a job, didn't install him in any of the other bars in town (we see a fairly good-sized main street at one point). I like that split-second where you can see the hand of a crew member giving a prop to Red in his store. I want them to release the Keith David cut. I like that their attempt to make wherever in California they filmed this look like Jasper is a Mizzou jacket on one of the bar guys, a Cardinals poster in Tilghman's office and a few licence plates. I feel bad for Emmet, who's obviously lived his whole life in the closet.

I'm sad that you don't like it, as to me it's a classic, one of the most entertaining movies ever. Maybe the new one will be more to your tastes?

[Gulftastic]

Roadhouse is up there with Commando for me for pure brainless fun. Only with more boobs.

[phantom_power]

Jeff Healey makes a reference to this being "just like Dayton" at one point, indicating they've both travelled. And the customers don't know his name, because after he breaks up a fight, Healey says "the name is Dalton". When Wade Garrett shows up at the Double Deuce, none of the staff recognise him except Tilghman, and Healey - again - introduces him after the fight.
Apart from the one right at the beginning, when he's still working that other bar, and the one where the guy has the knife in his boot. And Jack (the big guy) seems to blossom under Dalton's tutelage.

Again, he's not a superhero, but he kicks a lot of ass. I really feel like you're barking up the wrong tree with that one. He's trying to stop fights from happening, which is a large part of the cooler's job.
My theory on how Brad Wesley became rich, is he got in the business of supplying tables to dive bars.
Or maybe, after the Wesley stuff, she changed her mind on the kill-or-be-killed thing?

I think you're maybe expecting a bit too much logical rigour from the dive bar bouncer movie. I like bar work being seen as a career to the point where staff at a place in Jasper, MO know who the best bouncer is and what he did in Memphis. I wonder why Wesley, if he was so desperate to give Pat McGurn a job, didn't install him in any of the other bars in town (we see a fairly good-sized main street at one point). I like that split-second where you can see the hand of a crew member giving a prop to Red in his store. I want them to release the Keith David cut. I like that their attempt to make wherever in California they filmed this look like Jasper is a Mizzou jacket on one of the bar guys, a Cardinals poster in Tilghman's office and a few licence plates. I feel bad for Emmet, who's obviously lived his whole life in the closet.

I'm sad that you don't like it, as to me it's a classic, one of the most entertaining movies ever. Maybe the new one will be more to your tastes?

I liked it. I just thought it was a load of codshit. As I said either too much or too little in the rewrite department, either not far enough into the "mystical peaceful bounder who can actually kick arse when he needs to" area, or should have avoided all that stuff completely. Either have his mentor come and help him, or just leave him as a mystical figure rather than have him turn up, do not much and then get killed. Lots of half ideas that would have been good if explored a bit but maybe better not have half of them in there at all. I wonder if there was any studio interference in the final cut

[madhair60]

Roadhouse is up there with Commando for me for pure brainless fun. Only with more boobs.

whoa, what the heck, they shoulda called it Boob House!

[beanheadmcginty]

How many characters get crushed by taxidermy in this new one?

[monkfromhavana]

How many characters get crushed by taxidermy in this new one?

17.

[shoulders]

Road House is a stupid but riotously fun and enjoyable piece of trash.

CaB: who replaces all the broken tables, the meditation doesn't seem well integrated into the film

[Jim_MacLaine]

[phantom_power]

Road House is a stupid but riotously fun and enjoyable piece of trash.

CaB: who replaces all the broken tables, the meditation doesn't seem well integrated into the film

I may not have been entirely serious in my in-depth critique of this cinematic behemoth

[buzby]

I like that their attempt to make wherever in California they filmed this look like Jasper is a Mizzou jacket on one of the bar guys, a Cardinals poster in Tilghman's office and a few licence plates.

The Double Deuce and Red's Auto Parts were built on an empty lot in Santa Clarita, which isn't too far from the Castaic Lake nad Lake Piru reservoirs, so might explain the boat dealer opposite (which is now a veterinary clinic).

The Bandstand was a real club/bar in Anaheim next to I5 and only a block away from Disneyland, It was demolished in 2015 and there is now a hotel in it's place.

Stroudenmire's Ford dealership is clearly somewhere in southern California too, as at one point when Swayze and the others are stood watching Bigfoot driving through it, you can see a road sign for Bakersfield and LA in the background (the dealership was another set built specially for the film - it has large plate glass windows, but no roof).

[Noodle Lizard]

Oof. Well, then.

If I'm being extremely generous, it might have been an alright, if forgettable, action flick ... if it weren't a remake of Road House. Because unfortunately, with every character and every set piece, you're constantly reminded how much better the original was in every aspect.

Here's the ramble:

Spoiler alert

I don't know if a full comparison is worth anyone's time, but it's missing so much of what made that film as likable whilst transplanting it more or less beat for beat to a new time and place - and even the place is less good. Dalton isn't a bouncer, he's a former UFC fighter, the bar is a generic Florida beach bar, the Jeff Healy band is now a rotating selection of anonymous bands doing funky Sublime covers, and half of the action takes place on boats and their surrounding waters. All of the esotericness (sic) of the original is gone, as is the warmth and understated humour.

There's no Sam Elliott stand-in, however, instead we spend an undue amount of time with Connor McGregor, whose entire character was probably concocted during a particularly madlad session on GTA V.

That brings me to another point. There are precisely two good fighters in the film, and both are just 'roided up monsters. Neither of them look like anything out of real life, whereas Swayze and Elliott and the various goons from the original are all perfectly believable. The way the fights are directed doesn't help, with lots of flashy shakycam POV shots and distracting "hidden cuts" which ultimately just looks messy. You never get the sensation Gyllenhaal is actually a skilled fighter, just that the director's always on his side and will cut around frantically until he wins. The fights are a lot more carefully and clearly choreographed in the original, which makes it somewhat believable that Swayze could hold his own.

Swayze's also just a lot cooler than Gyllenhaal. It doesn't help that his character has none of the depth Swayze's did. In this, he's basically just a good fighter who can sometimes be so good he kills people. I think they tried to compensate for this lack of personality by making Gyllenhaal do Deadpool quips every so often, but that falls painfully flat almost every time.

By having him not be a bouncer, we miss out on all the good bits where Swayze's character actually has an ethos and a philosophy which makes him exceptional. We don't get to see him explaining and demonstrating how to deal with rowdy customers, and the other ways in which he turns the bar's fortunes around. We actually spend remarkably little time in the Road House in this one; Gyllenhaal gives the existing bouncer one tip on how to deal with a knife and job's a good'un while he spends most of his time elsewhere dealing with The Plot.

Don't get me started on Dr. Woman. How a film released in 2024 has somehow made that character so much shallower than her 1989 counterpart is beyond me. It's as if they didn't see that relationship as a valuable aspect to the story of the original, so here she's basically the obligatory shag/damsel in distress for our hero and that's it.

On a more personal note, then: where was the homoeroticism? You have a shirtless Jake Gyllenhaal roughhousing with a shirtless Connor McGregor, and yet it's as unsexy as watching Mrs Doyle and her friend fighting over who pays the bill. The original was full to the brim with manlust, it's part of its charm. Shame to lose that, but again it's something which makes me think Liman and co. didn't really understand what made that film so much better than its premise suggests.

[close]

A two-bagger at best.

[phantom_power]

Is it worth watching for someone who has no real love for the original and thinks Swayze is the antithesis of cool?

[studpuppet]

I'm REALLY surprised this hasn't been posted yet - it's right in the CaB wheelhouse:



https://x.com/HealeyCartoons/status/1770726516990640141

[Noodle Lizard]

Is it worth watching for someone who has no real love for the original and thinks Swayze is the antithesis of cool?

It's a worse version of the original, so probably not. Unless you think Connor McGregor pricking about like a 'roided up Father Fintan Stack is cool, I guess.

(I've been watching a lot of Father Ted lately, sorry for the repeated references)

[Jim_MacLaine]

I see Gyllenhall has bulked up for this but I just can't see him pulling off the role.

Always comes across naturally as twitchy nerd rather than laconic 'cool guy'.

[George White]

It's a worse version of the original, so probably not. Unless you think Connor McGregor pricking about like a 'roided up Father Fintan Stack is cool, I guess.

(I've been watching a lot of Father Ted lately, sorry for the repeated references)

He's like that IRL. I wouldn't be surprised if the people of Walkinstown are kept up by jungle music blaring from the Black Forge.

[Noodle Lizard]

I see Gyllenhall has bulked up for this but I just can't see him pulling off the role.

Always comes across naturally as twitchy nerd rather than laconic 'cool guy'.

Yeah, that's what they've gone for. He always seems a bit wimpy, even though he's able to swat away any opponent other than Connor McGregor without taking a hit, so they seem to have leaned into that by giving him Deadpoolisms.

*breaks guy's arm*
"Umm, so THAT just happened."

[Mister Six]

The original Road House is an absolute joy and a classic slice B-movie fun, so I tried to put it out of mind when I watched this - which wasn't hard, since aside from the protagonist's name and that line about nobody winning a fight, they're not remotely similar.

Sadly, even on its own terms this is quite shit.

I enjoyed the first hour, with a few reservations. Gyllenhaal was quite likeable and believable as a laconic tough guy; the bar characters were all decently sketched, with a couple of great mid-tier "It's them!" faces in there (Jessica Williams and Lukas Gage); the bikers were believably shitty - I liked the bloke from Narcos as the one randomly apologetic sweetie among them; the car park was decently put together; I appreciated the heavily foreshadowed crocodile making his appearance early in the film instead of turning up at the end; it is pretty intentionally funny in several places, with some playful direction here and there.

But most of the rest of it was cack. The film flatlined whenever Doctor Girlfriend was onscreen - just have Gyllenhaal fall in love with Williams; they have more chemistry anyway - and her dad was a nonentity (love how these two long-time Florida residents have Portuguese accents BTW). The little girl was irritating. The big baddie's henchmen were totally unremarkable looking guys with no screen presence. The later fights were boring and very clumsily stitched together with CG transitions. The CGI on the whole was appalling, actually. Having all the big action scenes take place on boats made no sense. The roadhouse itself looked like shit - absolutely no charm or atmosphere.

And then there's Conor McGregor. I already thought he was a cunt, but if he'd turned out to be a brilliant actor I'd have accepted it. But he's not. He's got no charisma, no screen presence, he obviously can't act but he also can't even believably menace, which is surprising for a rapist. He just wanders around grinning like a twat and absolutely murdering every line of dialogue he's given. His character has a bunch of Arnie-esque shit puns at his disposal, which a good actor could have played with a hint of irony, but McGregor just ends up looking like a halfwit who makes crap jokes. The fucker just sinks the film whenever he's on screen.

So yeah, shite, sadly. And my expectations were already low.

I liked it. I just thought it was a load of codshit. As I said either too much or too little in the rewrite department, either not far enough into the "mystical peaceful bounder who can actually kick arse when he needs to" area, or should have avoided all that stuff completely. Either have his mentor come and help him, or just leave him as a mystical figure rather than have him turn up, do not much and then get killed. Lots of half ideas that would have been good if explored a bit but maybe better not have half of them in there at all. I wonder if there was any studio interference in the final cut

I think you're just bad at watching films.

IIRC, the only major interference was them adding the striptease scene in with that battered wife character, which is why she's acting so weirdly out of character in it.

Ah, for the days when studios wanted to add nudity to films...

[phantom_power]

I think you're just bad at watching films.

If not liking Road House is wrong, I don't want to be right*


*is like something someone would say in Road House

[Dex Sawash]

Just started watching for first time. Came for the

boobs.

staying for the

homoeroticism*

_{*was sure someone said this but can't find it now}

[Goldentony]

Kind of tenuously echoes the real life case of town bully Ken McElroy.

I watched a documentary about this last night, six episodes, because the situation sounded so interesting and by episoded 2 they'd ran out of Ken information and decided the next four would be two unrelated crimes presented as some sort of TWIN PEAKS FUCKING CURSE, it was DOGSHIT and they should be PUT IN JAIL for making it