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March 28, 2024, 11:48:47 AM

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Hair in the time of Corona [merged]

Started by Stoneage Dinosaurs, March 18, 2020, 03:03:31 PM

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Stoneage Dinosaurs

Just coming to terms with the fact that the oncoming fuckfest will make it a risky business to go into THE BIG CITY and get my hair cut, so I will have to deal with this shit at home.

Option 1: Let it grow to a long length and risk looking like Geddy Lee
Option 2: Shave it all off and risk looking like Spud from Trainspotting
Option 3: Cut it myself and risk looking like A Proper Tit

Of course you could say that it doesn't matter what you look like when you're stuck at home all the time, but it MATTERS TO ME. I have to look at the pathetic hunk of fibres every day in front of the mirror.

What are you bastards going to do? Bald people please do not reply to this as I care not for your petty concerns.

Shoulders?-Stomach!

So they let you back in from Bulgaria? That must have been in the nick of time.


BlodwynPig

Bald people still have hair.

Two bald replies. Time to self-immolate

Puce Moment

I was due a haircut and dentist visit this week. Thinking about just being super careful about flossing and asking my wife to sort the barnet.

Stoneage Dinosaurs

Quote from: Shoulders?-Stomach! on March 18, 2020, 03:05:46 PM
So they let you back in from Bulgaria? That must have been in the nick of time.

Came back on the friday, flights from sofia airport being cancelled left right and centre but we seemed to get back alright. Worst thing that happened was a foul tasting dubious sandwich from the departures lounge, maybe the bulgarians saw us coming and served it up as a fucking off present

Sebastian Cobb

I'd been putting off getting my barnet cut for a couple of weeks, no excuse given I was off on holiday a couple of weeks ago.

I used to be able to cut it myself, I'm half tempted to give myself a grade 4 with my wahl beard trimmer thing.

Is anyone else planning to cut their own hair during this time of quarantine?

Blue Jam


Pingers


Barry Admin

Yep, haven't had a trim since November :-( tried to get one when I was last in town; that was the day after the first NI case of Coronoavirus was discovered, but my barber was having the day off. Haven't been near the city centre since.

Sebastian Cobb

I like the idea of whipping it all off then gambling it'll have grown back by the time this blows over. You could end up looking vaguely normal or you could catch it just as it's growing back and all stubbly.

Ferris

Quote from: Sebastian Cobb on March 18, 2020, 10:56:30 PM
I like the idea of whipping it all off then gambling it'll have grown back by the time this blows over. You could end up looking vaguely normal or you could catch it just as it's growing back and all stubbly.

Mad tempted to do this as well. Set of clippers in the bathroom for the beard, I could set it to stun and whizz all my hair off. Maybe a mohawk or mullet or something mad. Why not?

Blue Jam

Went for a walk earlier and saw several suspiciously well-groomed dogs. I think a few people might be sharing their panic-bought hair clippers with their pooches.

Blue Jam

Mr Jam's hair clippers arrived yesterday and I did my first ever bit of men's haircutting. Or any haircutting for that matter. He's looking sharp. Think I did a good job.

I still look like a bedraggled spaniel though. I'm quite jealous.

Blue Jam

Just looked through my calendar to see when my last haircut actually was.

Almost four months ago to this day.

Fucking hell.

Very tempted to order some proper hairdressing shears online but I wouldn't have a clue what to do with them. Time to fire up the YouTube tutorial videos again.

Hairdressers don't cut their own hair, do they? Do dentists drill their own teeth?

non capisco

Quote from: Blue Jam on May 21, 2020, 06:18:43 PM
Do dentists drill their own teeth?

Depends whether or not they've got a kitchen island and a home supply of FUGI-9!

QDRPHNC

The lack of needing to look normal has meant that my beard has had a chance to get through that awkward untidy phase. Ordered some moustache wax, going to sculpt myself a big walrus soon!

flotemysost

I cut my hair about a month ago and it's probably the most constructive/creative thing I've done in lockdown, quite happy with it.

Quote from: Blue Jam on May 21, 2020, 06:18:43 PM
Very tempted to order some proper hairdressing shears online but I wouldn't have a clue what to do with them. Time to fire up the YouTube tutorial videos again.

I think normal kitchen scissors should be OK for most hair types. I recently learned of the existence of spirit levels for hair (so you can see if you're cutting straight) and am tempted to get some, but if you snip upwards vertically into the ends (rather than straight across) I think that's generally less risky.

Now I just need to get some copies of Vogue from 2018, pour myself a glass of room temperature lemonade and ask myself if I'm doing anything nice at the weekend.

The Culture Bunker

My last haircut was about late January, and I'm fairly lucky my hair doesn't grow too fast - it's currently at Shaggy Rogers levels, just a problem with the back of it, really. Another month or so and it's just going to look far too silly, but no idea what I can do about it.

Blue Jam

Quote from: flotemysost on May 21, 2020, 11:56:26 PMNow I just need to get some copies of Vogue from 2018, pour myself a glass of room temperature lemonade and ask myself if I'm doing anything nice at the weekend.

"Are you going anywhere nice on holi... ah..."

Ordered some proper hairdressing shears earlier, think I'm going to try snipping into the ends as you (and numerous YouTubers) suggest. It's a good thing I wanted to grow my hair anyway but the ends are starting to feel a bit rough and it's looking quite revolting frankly.

Blue Jam

Hairdressing scissors arrived today. They are lethally sharp. I am now even more nervous about my impending self-haircut.

Long-haired lads and lasses of CaB: any tips please? I've seen a few YouTube tutorials that say lifting the ends of your hair up above your head so you can see them in the mirror is the way to do the back. I've also seen one video that suggests sectioning it with hair bands and that looks quite simple. Probably deceptively so:

https://youtu.be/FAmE16ej9IU

I like the top comment from someone saying they tried this while drunk and it turned out fine. That's reassuring.

flotemysost

Quote from: Blue Jam on May 23, 2020, 01:27:57 PM

https://youtu.be/FAmE16ej9IU


Videos of this lad keep popping up as sponsored content on my FaceBook feed, I never properly watch them/have the sound on and I assumed he was just an annoying PewDiePie sort (but one that bitches about people's DIY hair dye jobs), but I watched one all the way through today (because there's fuck all else to do) and it was actually pretty informative.

When I've cut my own hair I just section off the top layer with a clip, then part it down the back and flip both sides over my shoulders (so I can see everything in front of me - getting around the problem of reaching the back), trim the desired length off those bits (the 'underlayers') first, then un-clip the top half and trim that, with a bit of layering done by sort of fanning it out between my fingers and cutting in a gentle arc. I doubt Brad Mondo would approve though.

Still eyeing up these bad boys:



Captain Poodle Basher

I bought myself a pair of clippers for the princely sum of €20 and it's been grand. It's already paid for itself after 5 haircuts as I normally spend a tenner every fortnight on a haircut. I gave myself a Number 3 all over yesterday and took the length off my hair which is about all I feel confident enough to do. It really needs a professional's touch especially with thinning out but there's no way I'm chancing that even with the specialist attachment.

Dex Sawash


Bin the guards and go naked blades.

greencalx

Annoyingly I used to own some clippers. Convinced I still had them somewhere, as I don't remember getting rid of them. (However there have been 8 house moves since their purchase). Finally broken and ordered some more, as the Will Gompertz look is starting to piss me off. hoping the old ones will show up before the order is dispatched. Also tried to avoid amazon but everywhere else had sold out...

Fambo Number Mive

I haven't had a haircut since 2019. I've currently got a massive beard as well. Just can't be bothered to shave.

Butchers Blind

Currently at that point where its long but not long enough to be able to tie back.

Sebastian Cobb

Keep reading this to the tune of 'love in an elevator'.

Blue Jam

I have just cut my hair! It's actually looking alright and feeling one hell of a lot healthier. Ended up ignoring all the tutorial videos and decided to wing it. Just snipped into the ends to get rid of all the dead bits. Feel human again.

I have also just cut my fingers. Perhaps I really should have used kitchen scissors- those proper salon scissors are not for fucking around with. I already had a huge amount of respect for hairdressers but my level of respect has now gone through the roof.

Blue Jam

#28
Dyed my hair today. It had gone alarmingly grey.

Meanwhile:

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/business-53152952

Visors? Waiting list of 2,000? Think I'm just going to wait a few more months and keep using my posh scissors until all this madness is over.

Attila

Mr Attila has been taking the buzz cutters to his hair since lookdown, inspired by Pullo during our re-watch of Rome.

Last week I asked him if he were deliberately cultivating a rat-tail, as sort of off to the side on the back of his head was a clump of hair about three inches long, with everything else maybe 1/2 an inch.

Our relationship is such that if I suggested the sky was blue, Mr Attila is the type who would pull out maps, charts, a sextant, and other paraphenalia to give me a lecture on how it was in fact, yellow. If the kitchen were on fire, he wouldn't believe me until he himself had actually gone up in flames. Nothing factual that comes out of my mouth is ever believed. So he  just sort of 'Mmmh' shrugged about this thatch of hair and went about his business til the other day -- comes downstairs after a fresh trim and asks me why I didn't tell him that he had a clump of hair on the back side of his head about 3 inches longer than the rest of it.

I've been colouring my own hair again after about 6 months indulging at the local hairdressers. I expect their waiting list will also be miles long -- my dentist has already made noises that if you just want a regular cleaning they might not be able to fit you in til January as they have to do all of the emegencies and bigger projects first with a 3 month backlog -- so I'm sticking to the £5 semi-permanent stuff til whenever.