Weirdest Dreams II

[biscuitsandtea]

Last night I had a strange one -I was drowning in the ocean, after attempting to fix a fireworks display gone wrong, and Sean Penn used his flying hatchback car to rescue me.

I don't even like Sean Penn. Still, anything has got to be loads better than those reoccurring zombie nightmares. :/

[Rowlands]

I dreamt I was standing in my street, staring at the sky for what felt an eternity. Was a very nice day, as it should be 'cause I'm young and there were neighbours sat around in deck chairs chatting. Anyway, all the while, I can hear this low rumbling coming from the sky, which is why I'm looking at it. After a few moments, I see a plane far back behind the hills that overshadow the golf course nearby. I gets louder, but then suddenly takes a dip behind the hills, making me think it has crashed. However, in true James Bond fashion, it shot back over the hill. "Phew", I thought, before I realized that it was just making another dip and seemed to be heading straight for my forehead. At that point I finally ran, VERY slowly, and managed to jump over a neighbour's gate and hit the deck (even though I was still very much exposed to this big fuck off plane heading for my street. Some banging ensues and I wake up.

BUT THAT'S NOT ALL.

It was about 5AM when I woke up so I went back to sleep for another hour or so, during which I had this odd nightmare that I was being chased through the streets of Llandudno by a tank. Eventually it catches up with me at my other house, so I run for the back yard to hide in the shed. However, before I reach it, the tank fires. The shell lands, unexploded, in the hood of my coat and I managed to get into the shed. It still hadn't gone by the time I woke up.

[hpmons]

I dreamt that I suddenly realised I was made of meat, and was working out how much of myself I could cut off and sell each week.

[alan nagsworth]

I don't even like Sean Penn. Still, anything has got to be loads better than those reoccurring zombie nightmares. :/

Those are the best kinds of dreams, dude. Last time I quit the smoke I had them a LOT. I woke up sweating and in blind fear so many times, it was exhilerating.

One time, I shit you not, I lay in bed for about half an hour too scared to even open my curtains in case I saw an undead armageddon outside. I was paralyzed with fear.

[biscuitsandtea]

Those are the best kinds of dreams, dude. Last time I quit the smoke I had them a LOT. I woke up sweating and in blind fear so many times, it was exhilerating.

One time, I shit you not, I lay in bed for about half an hour too scared to even open my curtains in case I saw an undead armageddon outside. I was paralyzed with fear.

I had this one decrepit corpse lurch towards me last night, *must have been near the start of the zombie invasion when there were singles rather than masses of the undead* and I had nothing to fight it with, but some boiled sweets. Cold sweat indeed.

[alan nagsworth]

I've dug out the dream to which I was referring in my previous post, for your enjoyment biscuitsandtea! Top this 'un, scaredy!:

So, a zombie epidemic had broke out and me and a few other staff members had been quarantined in one of the conference rooms at the far end of the hotel because of fears that we had been infected. There were about five or six of us that were not infected, though, and one corpse which was soon to come back as a zombie. There was a lot of panic as we had no weapons or ways of fighting this zombie, and were trying to decide who would be fed to it (i.e. the weakest/most useless) while the others planned a way to get out of the room. It was fucking pandemonium.

Due to the weird mechanics of dreams, I somehow managed to get out while the reanimated corpse feasted on some hapless waitress. The staff outside the room were trying to resume business as usual but some of them had a distinct blue tint to their flesh, much like the zombie back in the conference room. It's obvious they were in denial of infection but god knows why they weren't quarantined with the rest of us. It was like some zombie conspiracy where the real zombies locked up the uninfected humans so they could continue multiplying amongst the more stupid living people. (Obviously that would mean I was one of the 'smart' humans - hey, it is an exaggeration of reality after all!)

I was in a mass panic at discovering this, and ran back to the conference room to tell the others... but when I got there, the majority of them were already zombies, and the others were dead and mutilated. The zombies looked seriously disturbing with garish, bloody mouths and rabid expressions. I was bloody petrified!

Then I woke up, and for a few minutes I lay silently in bed, listening for noises outside. I honestly thought that if I could hear general banter and traffic moving at rational speeds, I was safe... but if I heard screams and speeding cars, oh my god. The dream was so vivid I woke up thinking it was the end of the world!

[Shoulders?-Stomach!]

In a dream last night, I was in bed (conversely making me think I was awake) (stay with this!) - I thought of the name 'Manfred Nirvana', and with it chuckling my timbers I 'woke up' and decided to write it down. Then I looked at the piece of paper on the window and saw that the name Manfred Nirvana was ALREADY THERE.

When I actually woke up I didn't know what the hell was going on. Increasingly often I've been having these odd false awakenings. I think it's because I can hear some guys alarm clock going off next door early in the morning, and it always takes him ages to wake up. Or I'm actually a weirdo, which is something that I'm not going to confront.

I'm still not sure Manfred Nirvana is a funny name. As soon as I woke up I thought 'Hmm, why was I so enthusiastic about the name Manfred Nirvana?'

[The Widow of Brid]

Aww. I had my fingers crossed that was going to be a rant about the jews.

[Manfred Nirvana]

Go back to sleep.

[Shoulders?-Stomach!]

:D

Thanks for that, big grin here!

Is your name funny though?

[Manfred Nirvana]

I'd thank you not to laugh, son! I'm just trying to get on with my life, making my electro-acoustic music and growing my hair. The last thing I need is clowns like you tarnshing my lifestyle with your whimsical delusions.

[Shoulders?-Stomach!]

It's ambient acoustic!

Gah, why can't I make that stick?

[Manfred Nirvana]

Because you ain't doing it right. Take a look at me: I'm successful, handsome, and I don't spend my hours posting meaningless guff on some pissy forum. Years of countless self-promotion have got me where I am today. Get off your arse and sort it out!

Also, it helps if you have a catchy title. I've been operating under the name Mack Anderson for years. People often say it reminds them of Brett Anderson and performing 'Mack The Knife', only much, much better.

[alan nagsworth]

I had a dream last night, after having listened to the Peep Show Orchestra in Myspace in some weird sleepless deluded state, that was pretty much an entire episode of Peep Show invented in my head. It does contain various aspects of previous episodes, though.

Jeremy was undermining Johnson during some conference meeting to the point of Johnson having a nervous breakdown, and Mark and Jeremy had to step into do his job while he recovered. [various bits of them struggling to do his job, which I can very vaguely remember] They also received Johnson's car (the same one from 'that episode') and driving home with Mark in the passenger seat one day, Jez, in a fit of bitterness about the whole thing, starts swerving about carelessly, curbing the rims of the car and bumping into obstacles. Eventually he becomes so enraged he ploughs the car into a barrier, totally writes it off and gives Mark whiplash.

Back at the flat, Mark is panicking like crazy about the car (yes yes, all very similar) but Jez reassures him that "look, even if we get found out for doing that, we'll only get a maximum of a £60 fine" and starts touching on the idea of going back and torching the car for the hell of it. As the conversation ensues he becomes more and more enthused about doing this, until it becomes a definite plan.

The last scene involved Mark, Jez, Super Hans and some random mom-dad-and-child family (out of whose nearby parked car they are playing loud music) standing on a bypass bridge looking down at the totaled car. Hans chucks a match down and the car is immediately engulfed in flames. Hans then turns to the father of the unknown family and says "Can we take your car down there and watch the fire? So that we can still hear the music."

The fucking Lit theme song even played out before I woke up.

[tisonlyme]

Horrible nightmare last night

Loads of people were being possessed by the devil which turned their mouths and tongues black.I had to transport the possessed in a rickshaw to a cafe where Lenny Henry worked.Lenny was the only one who could help de-possess them.Ben Fogle was also there

[confettiinmyhair]

I dreamt I was being controlled in some kind of shoot-em-up computer game, the rapper Ludacris tried to help me out, former NFL linebacker Terry Crews tried to kill me, and MMA fighter Keith Jardine briefly wandered around with a large machine gun. It turned out the computer game I was involved in was controlled by the guy who plays Dexter in popular US drama series Dexter.

[Shoulders?-Stomach!]

Me, my best mate Nick and Charlie Higson drove out into the country to convince a group of people from the BBC to make a third series of Big Train.

Why, I have no idea.

[An tSaoi]

For some reason, Paul Kaye and the guy who plays Superhans had started a double act and I had to pitch a sitcom to BBC 3 about them. It was about them working in an icecream van and putting drugs in the icecream. Odd.

[Shoulders?-Stomach!]

That could well happen.

[hpmons]

A man had a hook on the end of a rope, and put the hook in my eyelid and tied the rope round the middle of a horse. He said he was going to make the horse ride 90 miles, with me trailing helplessly behind it.

[buttgammon]

The other night, I dreamt that the Premier League had resurrected that awful 'game thirty-nine' idea and as I was settling down to watch the TV coverage of the extra games (which had become a massive circus), I became Edwin van der Sar. I ended up walking out with the rest of the United team on to a tiny playing field in Singapore in a terrible torrential rainstorm. This place didn't even have a stand, and the grass was very overgrown. As if that wasn't bad enough, huge black snakes that were hidden in the grass kept suddenly slithering at me. I tried to tell the referee that I couldn't play with a penalty area full of snakes but he either couldn't hear or pretended not to hear.

[Cerys]

Interpretation time - you feel uncomfortable in a certain sexual (or potentially sexual) situation, but the other person doesn't notice.

[alan nagsworth]

I had a dream my housemate thought my Wimblemong serve was a load of shit (this was after I stayed up til 4am working on it and went straight to bed after posting it) and woke up feeling really weird. I remember looking back at my PC in the dream and the mong was just a white background with some source images sloppily pasted on it with blocks of text mucking up the whole thing, it looked awful!

Boy, self-conscious or what!

[The Widow of Brid]

I dreamt I was going out with Alan Moore at conventions (that is, he was still married to Melinda Gebbie but I was his convention based secondary). It was a really great dream, then I woke up just as I'd been annoyed with him for some reason which was a shame. Except that I fell back asleep, managed to get back into the dream at which point he apologised. And then we ended up fighting aliens and burglars with Mouse, my ma and David Tennant.


I don't fancy Alan Moore at all, but that dream was just the greatest time.

[buttgammon]

Interpretation time - you feel uncomfortable in a certain sexual (or potentially sexual) situation, but the other person doesn't notice.

That makes sense.

At this point, it would be sensible for me to add that I have never had any remotely sexual experience with a football referee, linesman or other sporting official. Or Edwin van der Sar.

[the midnight watch baboon]

So you're a huge black snake man, ehh?

[Cerys]

This is why Vaseline is your friend.

[Shoulders?-Stomach!]

Last nights dream started like a film trailer. Lots of quick cuts, and Mel Gibson was in it. A psychological breakdown, and he got in his car with someone else (me?) and drove off. After some passing of time segues we appeared to end up in North Carolina, in this strange town that looked rather like an old French or English peasant village. We ended up in a pub, and yes, the dream had become inconsistent by now. After a conversation with the landlady it was now World War II. After a short while it became apparent that the landlady was disgruntled with the level of law and order in the town, openly wishing that someone would take over and sort the problems out like a real man. In stepped this character, an odd fellow with a moustache and long dangly curly hair, who offered himself as that man. As I wasn't involved personally, I felt like a spectator which was quite fun, not to get directly emotionally involved in a story conjured up by my own mind. I'm not sure what happened to Mel Gibson, I hope he sorted out his psychological breakdown and doesn't take it out on anyone, or any race of people.

[neveragain]

Me, my best mate Nick and Charlie Higson drove out into the country to convince a group of people from the BBC to make a third series of Big Train.

I don't know why either but that's just made me grin like a lunatic, thanks. I think it's the 'nice day out in the country' feel to it.

The Peep Show episode was also quite enjoyable. I dreamed an episode of One Foot In The Grave once. It was a single-scene one with Victor and Margaret waiting for a taxi. At one point Victor leaned into the camera and his face went all wibbly. Margaret looked annoyed.

[alan nagsworth]

I had a fucking horrible dream earlier. I dreamt that it was christmas day and me and a bunch of friends were meeting up to play Super Mario Galaxy 2 on my Wii as I'd received it as a gift. Most of my friends were already at my house but I had to pick one of them up on a motorbike as he lived just out of town. On the way back with him on the back of the bike, I crashed and while I escaped pretty much unharmed, my friend was killed.

Unable to deal with the experience of having to talk to the paramedics, I drove home in a state of heavy distress, whereupon I broke the news to the rest of my friends. We all broke down in tears in a particularly traumatic scene which is still embedded in my head now. It was absolutely awful.

Skip forward to a non-descript point in the future and I'm in the back office of reception at work, talking to a friend and explaining what had happened. When I mentioned that my friend had been killed the open door behind me slammed twice in very quick succession which scared the living daylights out of me, and my friend said "I guess he doesn't like you talking about him like that."

Then I woke up with quite a start feeling utterly terrible.