Weirdest Dreams II

[mook]

I've been going through a bout of having sex dreams just lately; disappointingly they all feature my girlfriend, you'd have thought my sub-conscious could've called upon any of the 3 billion-ish women on the planet to star in my dreams, but no, I get lumbered with a women I've been with for nearly fourteen years. There's not one hole, nook or cranny on the poor cow I haven't stuck part of myself in the time we've been together, but still I dream about having sex with her, not the late night drunken bravura sex either, it's the early morning gentle lazy love making variety. Frankly, I find this disturbing.

[wheatgod]

I'm no dream interpreter, mook, but its fairly clear that this dream means you are gay.

[Suttonpubcrawl]

Not just gay, but a gaylord.

[non capisco]

I had a dream the night before last in which I was wandering around some vaguely concrete building trying to find DVD boxed sets of all five seasons of some show or other. The first three seasons, it seems, had been fairly popular, but everyone I asked said not to buy the fourth season, in which the entire cast had been replaced with a single character called "Pascal Blue", who was a small cartoon character with a giant blue quiff that was cut into geometric shapes. The season after that, they had brought back the original characters but had them all played by the cast of the Scott Adams comic strip Dilbert. And then it was cancelled.

That reminds me of the dream I had just after a mate had lent me the first two series of 'The Wire' and was on at me to watch them staright away as it was the best TV show ever. I dreamt that it was set in Crayford and starred Bernie Clifton and my nan. The rest of the dream was me yelling at him how shit it was.

[dredd]

  I found a dream write up from a few months ago. They always seem wierder this way.

The internet cafe had reopened, but with slightly different people, but was apparently a great success. I went there a few times (or was it just one,long day?). The different people included some of the potential staff from the first (actual) time, and at least one person I remembered from university. There was an upstairs - I know this because a man fell through a trapdoor?!
Oh yes, incidentally the place had now become a deathtrap, and the staff were getting bumped off one-by-one, in "accidents".
  One man, who looked like Bernard Hill (bearded), was secreted alone in a back room upstairs, and was annoyed when I walked in, causing me embarassment, as I shuffled out backwards. He was definitely some kind of important customer, who was not to be disturbed. He may have been embarassed about what was on the screen, which I never saw.
  There was a "landing" at the top of the stairs with a staff member at a computer -it was a girl I quite liked of course! I spent some time plucking up courage to try and ask her out.
  The downstairs area was more open plan and very large - it had 100 computers or so, with a desk for a staff member. The upstairs just seemed to have the landing and 2 rooms, perhaps only one computer per room? The staff member + desk had gone when the trapdoor incident happened on the landing - place seemed run down and empty of machines at that point.
  I saw one large room full of computers with people at them, possibly some unruly teenagers.
  I felt culpable and very guilty for the trapdoor incident, as I knew it was there, and watched the guy walk right across it before I could warn him - seemed to happen whilst the shop was empty, the middle of the night. I ran downstairs to help but someone (suspicious character?!) was there and had already called an ambulance?! I tried to help him and it looked like he would be fine, he was awake and talking, and didn't blame me. Rather than a trapdoor exactly, it may been just a hole in the floor covered by carpet or something.
  This incorporated the Benazir Bhutto assassination in some bizarre way. At one point I seemed to be a close range eye-witness to a shooting-then-bombing of some dignitary, who had just boarded the coach I was on. This is something  I may have been watching with several other people on television at the cafe (like the kind of shot where the tv is being filmed, and then it melds into the live action on the tv).
  I spent several days there, possibly. Mostly walking around, some feeling of wasting time on the internet/waching other people waste time on the internet
  A few repeated scenes of a large traffic intersection that at some points I'm driving through, at great risk, in some kind of small, ridiculous car. The wave of traffic seems to push me toward the pavement.

[explodingvinyl]

I've been going through a bout of having sex dreams just lately; disappointingly they all feature my girlfriend, you'd have thought my sub-conscious could've called upon any of the 3 billion-ish women on the planet to star in my dreams, but no, I get lumbered with a women I've been with for nearly fourteen years. There's not one hole, nook or cranny on the poor cow I haven't stuck part of myself in the time we've been together, but still I dream about having sex with her, not the late night drunken bravura sex either, it's the early morning gentle lazy love making variety. Frankly, I find this disturbing.

Love, Ladies and Gents.

[Melody Lee]

Love indeed.

I had a strange and fairly disturbing dream last week. It involved me sitting around with friends watching tv, flipping through various channels and finding a 'Strange But True?' type programme. Lots of dodgy eyewitness stories and awkward alien abduction 'dramatizations'.
Then came a piece of shaky but clear footage of some strange thing (captioned 'beast from another dimension?') that appeared briefly somewhere in south america, before fading away again. My initial reaction was to mock it - 'Oh, come on... it's a bloke in a suit!' - but then I got a clearer look at it and saw it's big, rolling, spooked eyes. It was like a man-sized dog-like humanoid with no visable ears, thick but short fur (with black and dark brown stripes), stubby fingers and very broad, sloping shoulders. There was somebody poking a stick at it, making it shake and snap at the air with it's long jaws (sort of like a crocodile's jaw, or an elongated Afghan hound jaw).
It was disturbing because after being dismissive of it, I got the sense that it was actually alive and very alien. It's eyes were rolling white in it's head and the movements of it's head and jaw were shaky, terrified and real. After a few moments it faded away like a ghost and the tv programme continued with pie dish UFOs.

Hyum!

[simondykes]

I definitely find that whatever I eat during the evening affects my dreams,so if,for instance,I've eaten out and had a meal which is probably richer and nicer than anything I'd ever bother to cook for myself at home,my dream that night will be a full-on 3-D epic in Dolby.
I can't remember any recent dreams at all,though I do like hearing other peoples,mainly because you think 'how the hell did your brain come up with that?'....although most of the time with dreams I remember,I can usually trace bits of them back to things that have happened to me during the day (or that I've seen on TV,etc).
The most vivid dream I ever remember was when I was still living with my parents,years ago,in the Midlands.What was unusual was that I dreamt I was at home,in bed,at night and got out of bed to look out of the window - the unusual thing being that home was exactly how my home was,not just some weird place that dream-logic tells you is 'home',which is more likely.I looked out of the window and saw two dots of light heading towards each other,and thought,"Hey,those planes are going to crash!"....when they did get closer together and crash,it turned out that they weren't planes,but massive mothership style UFOs which suddenly lit up in streams of lights.Interestingly,the ships were rectangular,rather than being saucer shaped or triangular.Anyway,because everything else in the dream was so real,I went absolutely apeshit,running around the house and trying to wake everyone up,because I had just seen real UFOs.Obviously,I then woke up for real and (after the obligatory cartoon-style dash to the window just to make sure) was incredibly disappointed.The strange thing is,I couldn't get back to sleep,because my head was actually buzzing,I was convinced I could actually hear my synapses crackling because of the amount of work they'd gone to to produce that dream - the only other time that happened in my life was when I went to see 'Natural Born Killers' at the pictures,because there was so much information being thrown at my brain during the film that it took a couple of extra hours to process it in my head.Or something.

[Hank_Kingsley]

I've been going through a bout of having sex dreams just lately; disappointingly they all feature my girlfriend, you'd have thought my sub-conscious could've called upon any of the 3 billion-ish women on the planet to star in my dreams, but no, I get lumbered with a women I've been with for nearly fourteen years. There's not one hole, nook or cranny on the poor cow I haven't stuck part of myself in the time we've been together, but still I dream about having sex with her, not the late night drunken bravura sex either, it's the early morning gentle lazy love making variety. Frankly, I find this disturbing.

Aw. You romantic you. I'm always having sex dreams about my lady, I haven't been with her for fourteen years though.
It's lovely, although they all seem to take place around water...swimming pools, beaches, fountains. I think I may need to have her piss on me. It's the only way.

[hpmons]

I usually write down my dreams, and Ive done that more so this year - the word document I put it in is at 16000 words so far for 2008 (while all the other years put together are only 24000).  They are all fairly weird, except on the rare occasion when they are incredibly banal.  Last week I dreamt that I accidently threw something into the wrong bag of rubbish, thats how dull it was.  Another time I was looking in the kitchen for some rubber gloves.

I like the slightly evil ones, they seem most interesting to me.  In this, Charlotte is my sister, all others are people from school.

I was in a swimming pool with several other (dead looking) people; me and Char were men, most of the others were men.  I somehow knew it was a film called Citizen Kane, and the father (who "killed" us) was surnamed Kane.  I spoke to Char, and s/he was not dead, then I realised my One True Love was not dead either, and she suggested we get out of here (there were 3 other dead bodies from earlier on in the film)
-   (In first person) I grasped her leg, Char grasped mine, (and so on, several other people were alive), dove deep into the pool, then came out on the opposite side & pulled ourselves up.  We ran up a staircase, but someones foot kept being between my legs.  We were in our fathers house/mansion.  There was a junction at one point, and all but one went one, and (purposely) one went the other.  I considered it for a split second, but decided to follow the flock.  For a brief flash I felt that person would be the one to survive to tell the tale, but only after I had chosen the usual way.
-   We went down staircases, and someone's hand kept clawing at me.  I pulled them off a few times and told the crowd not to keep touching me.  Someone mentioned that Becka had the same problem, and I saw a scratch on her face.  Hannah returned from downstairs, saying it was blocked or something, and we all started going back up, me a little further in front of everyone else.  The scratching came more and more, and I felt there was something not right about it.  Then everyone stared at someone (Hannah?) who was being invisibly scratched and blood came down.
-   I tried to continue walking up, but my legs were heavy.  Then she was dying, and Becka was dying, and I realised that Mr Kane (possibly "Dr" Kane?) was clawing at us, and that was his plan all along – to kill us slowly and painfully.  I also realised that he would follow where the most people were, so the person who ran the other direction earlier may be alive because Kane would still get the majority. 
-   I told the others that it was Kane, and considered fleeing on my own, in the hope that I could stay alive.

There are lots of ones that I find interesting, but are far too long and reference things that only make sense to me.  Nowadays I tend to wake up at 8am, then go back to sleep until midday, which means I remember at least three dreams each night, though I dont always remember to write them down.

[rudi]

I definitely find that whatever I eat during the evening affects my dreams

So, mook should be laying off those sausage rolls for supper then...?

[buttgammon]

Last night, I had a dream where nothing at all happened. I was just sitting in my classical civilisation class having a mundane conversation with two friends and that was about it.

I only usually remember the extremely surreal dreams I have, I dunno what quite made me recall that one.

[Claude the Racecar Driving Rockstar Super Sleuth]

I have a recurring dream of sorts about wandering around a huge underground complex. Although it does have a train system and toll gates and is apparently open to the public, it doesn't appear to be the Tube as it has shops and restaurants and such. It's a rather dingy place too, with lots of undecorated, grey concrete surfaces and inadequate lighting in some areas.

Though the dreams are different, I always seem to just be hanging around aimlessly, which makes me think it might be some sort of metaphor for my dull unemployment. In the latest one I saw this girl I fancy boarding a train and, without a thought for what a tit it'd make me look, I dashed after her and jumped on the train as the doors were closing. I wanted to have a chat with her, but after all that I chickened out and just meekly said hi. Even in my dreams I'm a loser.

[buttgammon]

I have a recurring dream of sorts about wandering around a huge underground complex. Although it does have a train system and toll gates and is apparently open to the public, it doesn't appear to be the Tube as it has shops and restaurants and such. It's a rather dingy place too, with lots of undecorated, grey concrete surfaces and inadequate lighting in some areas.

That sounds like the underground city thing they have in Montreal. It could be that if you've been there or heard about it I guess.

[PAGATRON]

Isn't weird that no matter what happens in your dreams you accept as normal then when you wake up you start thinking 'What the Fuck! That was weird'

The last dream I remember I was in a huge rush to get to my parents house to redecorate my room, I get there go up to my room theres no paint on  the walls and the floor is littered with lads mags and I thought to myself 'Jesus I got a lot of work to do, I better get started' so I'm tidying up the mags on the floor its then I wake... In my flat, with the huge realization that I don't live with my parents anymore.

[simondykes]

I still have dreams about jobs I used to have years ago and the relief when I wake up and realise I don't actually work for,say,WHSmith,any more is incredible.

[buttgammon]

Last night, I dreamt I was dropping acid (I've never actually taken it) in my bathroom with three friends (none of whom are particularly pscyhedelic types either). While they were all seeing giant millipedes crawling up the walls, geometric shapes emerging in the air and the black wall tiles morph into purple spirals, it had no effect on me whatsoever so I just ran a bath. But they were all concerned about what could happen with me in a really deep bath in my (supposedly) drugged state so they all had to stay in there with me, even as I got undressed. I didn't mind and we just sat around having a laugh and listening to The Isley Brothers as the effect wore off on them almost immediately.

Then, later, we all went off to a crap club. In fact, it was so crap we all just walked straight through the place and back out again, though as we were leaving I noticed a lot of hardcore (I mean this when I say it!) porn mags lying in several big piles on the floor that they were seemingly giving away for free so naturally, I grabbed them all. But walking home, I saw a police car and was terrified that they would know what I had been up to with the acid earlier on so I almost dropped all the magazines.

That was bloody crazy!

[brand_new_modems]

and then you got OFF the bus!

[hoverdonkey]

I keep dreaming about driving a Renault 5 under water. It's happened three times in the last month

[Ginyard]

Like a budget James Bond.

I don't dream much but I often have to listen to my wife talking in her sleep and, nine times out of ten, she's swearing at me, which she doesn't do much of when she's awake. I'm guessing her subconscious is speaking up loud so I get the real message.

[hoverdonkey]

Budget James Bond indeed. So far, I have become involved in a minor collision every time and spent the rest of the dream sorting out the infinitely boring insurance details. My life is relatively quiet and pedestrian, you would have thought my subconscious would be screaming for some thrills and spills.

[PAGATRON]

Like a budget James Bond.

I don't dream much but I often have to listen to my wife talking in her sleep and, nine times out of ten, she's swearing at me, which she doesn't do much of when she's awake. I'm guessing her subconscious is speaking up loud so I get the real message.

She doesn't say someones name does she?

[Ginyard]

She just groans 'you fucking Studmuffin'. Like I say, she's talking to me. Surely?. Maybe...

[PAGATRON]

...But no names? Good, I mean, ..Err, nothing.

Anyway back on topic, I had this dream where I was walking up a flight of staircases in some building, I got to the top level walked through a door into an office and was welcomed by a tall man who seemed familiar and a woman sitting at her desk who I didn't know at all, it was at this point I became fully aware I was dreaming, I thought cool maybe I can get some information out of these two I can remember for when I wake up. And thats when turn slightly weird first of when I try and focus on their faces they become distorted (not quite like on tv where they blur out peoples heads) when I asked them where I was the woman told I was near London bridge, when I asked for her name she refused to answer and thats when I woke up.

Where near London Bridge? Who are you people?

DARN YOU BRAIN!!!

[Emma Raducanu]

Yeh, dream characters in lucid dreams are fukin sinister

[simondykes]

Last night I actually dreamt I was sitting here posting on this forum and getting irritated because every thread seemed to be about peoples favourite vegetables.

[Claude the Racecar Driving Rockstar Super Sleuth]

I still say parsnips are better than courgettes.

[Melody Lee]

A Turnip shaped like a 'thingy' always hits the spot, I have to say.

Last night I dreamt I was in a nameless first person shooter; I loaded a saved game I hadn't bothered with in a while. Once I got into it and released a bunch of prisoners it started getting fun. The prisoners piled into a big tank, I got on a motorbike and we went tearing down a hill after blasting a hole in the prison/camp wall. I thought to myself 'Fuck, I ought to play this level more often!'
Getting near the bottom of the huge hill leading onto a grassy meadow we came under fire from a machine gun position just on the edge of this enormous forest. We positioned ourselves behind some blasted, thick-trunked trees and began firing back... when suddenly the enemy machine gunners vanished and there was a gang of weird fellas in cartoonish musketeer outfits with gaudy face paint on. They had unstoppable, god-like powers and were basicly out to torture and be quite perverse. I woke up a bit confused, obviously.

[Pylon Man]

When I woke up this morning and was in that sort of half-awake half-asleep state I had a really weird dream. Obviously I had to get up and get dressed (in real life) so in this half-dream state I dreamt that in order to do this I had to speak a sentence stating that the item of clothing was on me. In French. Using the subjunctive. Needless to say, I couldn't manage it so decided to just get dressed manually. The line between the dream and real life at this point is very blurred.

[Mindbear]

I had this horrid dream yesterday morning. I tend to get to sleep about six am and dream about midday, which leaves me screwed if I have to wake up because I'm like a lunatic if woken whilst dreaming. I dreamt that I had this disease where I had to sleep all the time...well, basically narcolepsy, but in the dream every time I fell asleep, there was just blackness, and then I'd be fighting to wake up, and in the dream I'd wake, and i'd be on a ferry of some sort, and then a bathroom, and with these people who kept touching me and I'd want to run off, but again, I'd have to sleep. I also kept waking up for real and wanting to stay away but felt totally panicked and unable.

I didn't like it.