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February 26, 2024, 12:00:23 PM

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Only Fools and Horses

Started by Leej88, June 08, 2021, 05:27:09 PM

Previous topic - Next topic

frajer

Rodney, Del and Uncle bombing down Peckham in a bathtub.

LOOK OUT CASSANDRA THIS FING AINT GOT NO BRAAAAAAKES

Elderly Sumo Prophecy


Video Game Fan 2000

I was 'aving a miscarriage the other day and my wife Dolly came in and I only 'ad to fuckin' eat it. Cunt.


BJBMK2

Rodders: It wasn't him, Del, it was you. Remember that night in the Nags Head  you came down to my dressing room and you said, "Kid, this ain't your night. We're going for the price on Trigger." You remember that? "This ain't your night"! My night! I coulda taken Trigger apart! So what happens? He gets the title shot outdoors on the ballpark and what do I get? A one-way ticket to Plonker-ville! You was my brother, Del, you shoulda looked out for me a little bit. You shoulda taken care of me just a little bit so I wouldn't have to take them dives for the short-end money.

Del Boy Trotter Independent Traders: Oh I had some bets down for you. You saw some money.

Rodders: You don't understand. I coulda had class. I coulda been a contender. I coulda been somebody, instead of a big plonker, which is what I am, let's face it. It was you, Del.

*Chandelier falls down*

Leej88


Video Game Fan 2000

Did you you see that TV coverage of the Pope when he was lying in state? The last Pope, you know, John Paul? Lying in state?  Dressed as Del Boy? Didn't half give me the horn, that. Him lying there. He looked pukka, didn't he? They put that sheepskin coat on him. That really gave me the horn. I mean, like, I couldn't prevent myself, you know, having a miscarriage immediately 'cause he looked, he looked luvvery jubly.

chveik


BJBMK2

Had the pleasure of meeting Cassandras Miscarriage at a charity do last year. He was surprisingly down to earth and VERY funny.

kalowski

The man from Del Boy, he say "yes"!

frajer

"As far back as I can remember, I always wanted to be an independent trader."

Freeze frame on Rodders as 'Rags to Riches' kicks in and title card appears: TROTFELLAS

Leej88

The spinoff we never got Hotrod.

Video Game Fan 2000

That's my secret Del : I'm always a plonker.

JamesTC

I've Leonard Pierced my foot on a spike!

Thosworth

I'm sorry Dave, I'm afraid I can't do that

madhair60

You fucking nonce, Rodney. You reprehensible fucking paedophile

BJBMK2

TV Cream Greatest TV Moments #59: Buster Merryfield falling over at the Comedy awards while wiggling his arse at Michael Jackson, machine gunning the audience with blanks (cos he's in the war, during the war, war, lol), and right before he made that hilarious crack (arse), about fisting Norman Tebbit.

madhair60

It's beyond pain, Rodney. It's something else. Something better

Leej88

No one is like that in our family.

Kankurette

I think Del Boy is pretty cool guy, eh falls through bars and doesn't afraid of anything.

Leej88

David Jason should have a open bar as his gravestone.

BJBMK2

My pitch for the next series of OFAH, an episode called "Trigger Warning".

I mean, all I have is the title so far. It's about...I dunno...Trigger getting cancelled?

You have to admit though, it's a good title. You HAVE to say that. You have to fucking say that. Right.

Video Game Fan 2000

Its about time. He's been deadnaming Rodney the entire time without consequence.

Leej88

Trigger is in heaven with his broom parts.

frajer

There is a pleasure in the pathless woods,
There is a rapture on the lonely shore,
There is society, where none intrudes,
By the deep Sea, and music in its roar.
I love not Man the less, but Nature more,
BUSH BUSH BUSH BUSH BUSH BUSH BUSH

jobotic

Whenever he called Rodney Dave did Trigger smile to himself and go "heh..triggered" when Rodney pulled a face? Then do a crying/laughing face because there weren't emojis then?

Video Game Fan 2000

You're right, Trigger is the most evil fictional character.

kalowski

Bracelet says "Wayne Rooney"

imitationleather

The one where they find a load of women under the floorboards of Trigger's flat.

Elderly Sumo Prophecy

Quote from: BJBMK2 on June 08, 2021, 10:09:07 PM
My pitch for the next series of OFAH, an episode called "Trigger Warning".

I mean, all I have is the title so far. It's about...I dunno...Trigger getting cancelled?

You have to admit though, it's a good title. You HAVE to say that. You have to fucking say that. Right.

Alternative titles:
Triggernometry
Dead Trigger Storage