Balls Of Steel

[amputeeporn]

Coming up next Dead Rockstars in which it was revealed Ian Curtis actually had a fit tying his shoes and Richey Manic was eaten by the other Manics.

Don't read this bit

[Emergency Lalla Ward Ten]

I had a dream about Balls of Steel last night. They had a character called The Sick Man, who lies on the floor in casualty departments pretending he's collapsed, but when the doctors and nurses attend to him he jumps up and says 'Ha, you care about stuff - losers!!!'.

[Slackboy]

Sorry, this programme makes me overly angry about what are essentially poor saps who want to fanny about on telly for a bit .....cunts.

Get with it daddy. Big Brother is like contemporary art, hating it is the same as loving it, anger is as welcome as delight.
Just by givin' a damn, youze puttin'-out for the man.

I've just realised that a lot of you are really viral marketers. It's genius: all you have to do is come across as a bunch of reactionary idiots that no normal person would agree with, and then you say how much you hate something and go on and on about it. As a result the programme gets more viewers who are just interested in it because it appears to wind you lot up.

And on top of that you go on about how much you hate viral marketers too. Daddy is so proud of you kids.

[Emergency Lalla Ward Ten]

all you have to do is come across as a bunch of reactionary idiots

Examples?

[Slackboy]

Throw a brick.

[Emergency Lalla Ward Ten]

No, examples.

[Slackboy]

I can't be bothered to show you any examples, therefore you win. Not only this time but for any argument we may have in the future, and I hereby concede that everything I have ever written on this board is wrong. Congratulations.

[Justandy]

Yeah.  Because anyone who can't justify their opinions is still  right.  Right kids.?  (And if anyone wants to argue with me then don't even bother 'cos I'm still right.

[Catalogue Trousers]

I can't be bothered to show you any examples, therefore you win. Not only this time but for any argument we may have in the future, and I hereby concede that everything I have ever written on this board is wrong. Congratulations.

Oh boo fucking hoo, poor misunderstood Slackboy. Nothing like a bit of unjustified passive-aggressive whinging to get your point across.

[TJ]

Hmmm... Balls Of Steel presents itself as the most daring and edgy comedy show ever, right? Even the title tries to suggest that. But look again at the various confirmations of staged events, and more particularly at Morgan's account of how the 'big reveal' was done before anyone could a) get upset and angry and b) interfere with the recording. All nicely staged-managed and calculated to avoid risk. Which some parties would no doubt argue was fair enough.

But... well, let's just have a look at a couple of less self-aggrandising comedy shows, shall we. Raw footage of Adam & Joe visibly cacking themselves after being tacitly threatened by handy-looking sarf London shopworkers, Paul Garner routinely being threatened with arrest and/or physical violence 'live' on air (with sometimes even Chris Morris recoiling at how heated the situations had got), Mark Thomas doing just about everything he's ever done ever... doesn't look so 'dangerous' now, does it?

[Emergency Lalla Ward Ten]

How did they deal with the Tom Cruise incident in the end? The raw footage, which was on youtube for a while (and maybe still is), was extraordinarily bleak - the prankster standing there and apologising/looking embarrassed while Cruise tells him off.

[Purple Tentacle]

shopworkers, Paul Garner routinely being threatened with arrest and/or physical violence 'live' on air (with sometimes even Chris Morris recoiling at how heated the situations had got)

If Balls of Steel ever made me laugh as much as

"Shape, glorious shape
You, sir, have a bad one
Please tuck in your arse
Looking at you is no fun"

I would forgive it anything.

Luckily I can make this claim because I know it never will. I win!