Miss Whatever

[purlieu]

Make sure to show her my 'GET THE ROYAL MAIL OFF FACEBOOK' group.

[rudi]

Yeah, but who will be laughing when I'm having miserably uninspired sex with her, eh?

A clown you've hired for the occasion?

[biggytitbo]

Who's the sexiest man on here? Who would be Mister Cab?

And if there's a contest there will be a swimwear round won't there?

[tater pie]

Oh God.

Where the fuck do you live?  My ones seem fairly normal, and it makes me proud that only 3 local girls have actually attempted to be part of this travesty: http://www.missengland.info/regionals/bromley

Anyway, Biggy there is no way you're seeing me in my birthday swim suit.

[purlieu]

Hinckley.

[tater pie]

Are the girls actually like that there?  At first I thought you'd photoshopped them all.

[Shoulders?-Stomach!]

Kirstin and Hannah look nice. The rest of them look- well- mutton dressed as slags.

[Captain Crunch]

Who's the sexiest man on here? Who would be Mister Cab?

Oh oh oh, can we have a quick round of CaB Top Trumps to find out?  What were the criteria again, facial hair, eyesight, alcohol dependency, still lives with mother and knowledge of Cardiacs back catalogue? 

[purlieu]

Are the girls actually like that there?

I don't know, I avoid leaving the house at all costs.  I did go to a bar, but it was full of 'alternative' students who'd come back for Christmas, so not a fair representitive of the town.

[Cerys]

Who's the sexiest man on here? Who would be Mister Cab?

And if there's a contest there will be a swimwear round won't there?

I know who I'd vote for.

Spoiler alert

I spend hours gazing at that photo of you, biggy, wishing ... just wishing.

[close]

[mook]

^ is SNG posting from the wrong account again?

[Kishi the Bad Lampshade]

My hometown has a "cutest babies" competition, and every year has a massive thirty-two page spread dedicated to it in the local paper, unless there's a murder on the same day

[Lookalike Mark Chapman]

My hometown has a "cutest babies" competition, and every year has a massive thirty-two page spread dedicated to it in the local paper, unless there's a murder on the same day

Which reminds me of this ...which reminds me of painfully failing to suppress laughter at work the first time someone posted it here.

As for the lovely ladies, the nearest I could find to me is here. And while some of them do indeed look rather lovely, I suspect in some cases their best asset may in fact be 'blind optimism.'

[boxofslice]

I like it when they parade these lovelies through town on the back of lorries in August.

[purlieu]

As for the lovely ladies, the nearest I could find to me is here. And while some of them do indeed look rather lovely, I suspect in some cases their best asset may in fact be 'blind optimism.'

Best so far here, I think.  Sarah Forsyth is particularly lovely.

[boxofslice]

Best so far here, I think.  Sarah Forsyth is particularly lovely.

I quite like Zoe-Anne.  She reminds of Sophie Ellis-Bexter which is a good thing.

[rudi]

I quite like Zoe-Anne.  She reminds of Sophie Ellis-Bexter which is a good thing.

Yeah, I can see that. Miss Portsmouth's wrong all over; fortunately I live in Southsea and we're too hand-wringy middle-class liberal to partake in anything fun and a bit degrading (other than sitting around being snooty about Portsmouth, of course).

[Lookalike Mark Chapman]

Best so far here, I think.  Sarah Forsyth is particularly lovely.

I thought you'd like her. But...

I quite like Zoe-Anne.  She reminds of Sophie Ellis-Bexter which is a good thing.

Really? She was one of the more optimistic entrants, I thought. I'm puzzled how someone's head can be both cuboid and concave at the same time. And before I'm accused of hypocrisy, I know I'm no oil painting - but then I've not put myself up for the Miss Canterbury 'judge me on my looks' competition.

Incidentally, at school we used to call Sophie Ellis-Bextor 'Dishface Ugly-Boxhead'. Kids can be so accurate cruel.

[biggytitbo]

Has anyone here ever considered entering Miss England?

[boxofslice]

Has anyone here ever considered entering Miss England?

Ba dum tish!

[purlieu]

Incidentally, at school we used to call Sophie Ellis-Bextor 'Dishface Ugly-Boxhead'. Kids can be so accurate cruel.

YEAH

SHE'S

WELL

UGLY

ISN'T

SHE?

EH?







Er.  Sorry.

[biggytitbo]

She's got a face like a 50p!

[boxofslice]

She's got a face like a 50p!

Biggytitbo talking rubbish there.

I used to fancy her back when she was in theaudience and her mum used to give me the horn back before I even knew what having the horn was.

[purlieu]

"Would you like to have sex with me?"

"Sorry, you look like this"



"I don't really, do I?"

"No, not really.  Will you still have sex with me?"


"No"

[Shoulders?-Stomach!]

She does have a face like a 50p, it's just the detail in between that's nicer. I prefer her from theaudience days where she wore leather and looked like she'd come fresh out of the oven in a batch marked 'stunning female women'.

She did a campaign for PETA so to be honest she can fall off a fucking cliff as far as I care.

[biggytitbo]

I like 50p though! I'd certainly like to 'spend' her if you know what I mean, oohh pardon!

[Tokyo Sexwhale]

It's Minnie Driver who has the face like a 50p.

Although, curiously I can't see any evidence of it in this picture.

[purlieu]

I think you've mistaken this for the Sexy thread.

[Ginyard]

Nessie!

[Lookalike Mark Chapman]

Er.  Sorry.

I was just saying what we called her at school!

I'd say she's one of those people - like Matt Smith, actually - who either looks gorgeous, or like nothing you've ever seen on this planet.