Viz Highlights

[NattyDread 2]

Paraphrasing these -

Convince visitors that you buy expensive butter by tearing the shit out of your bread before spreading the margarine.

Goldfish owners. Tired of seeing your pet trailing around a long stringy shite? A cotton bud placed upright in the goldfish bowl's gravel will enable it to wipe its arse.

Convince your girlfriend she's followed through in her sleep by placing a chocolate button between her bumcheeks while she snores.

[bgmnts]

Fuck me this is fucking funny shit.

[jobotic]

I remember hairy denim jerkin clad metallers being described as Kerrang-Utans

[beanheadmcginty]

Anybody here ever been to an Aqua Velvas gig?

[Jittlebags]

Forgot I submitted Ephraim Monk to the profanisaurus. Seems to be a lag of about 3 months. Fido Fudge may yet appear then.

[kenneth trousers]

When we tidied up the loft last year I went through every Viz I have (from about issue 34 ish) and put all the ones with Jack Black in to one side with the intention of scanning them all.
Obviously I never got round to doing the scanning bit. But I will one day I imagine.

[Video Game Fan 2000]

if someone here is mates with Davy Jones on twitter or facebook, can you ask if he's a fan of genius manga man Tiger Tateishi? cos this https://2.bp.blogspot.com/-ZQnQaYmmCiE/UqjdtzS9LxI/AAAAAAAAFc8/U4DVoc-BJtg/s1600/Terry+Fuckwitt's+Big+Idea.jpg reminds me of Teteishi. its almost a tribute. bit like finding an rare clip of Beat Takeshi doing Four Candles

[Moj]

Ooh,Davey Jones doing Terry Fuckwitt is so odd. It's like the Chuck Jones Tom & Jerry's.

[madhair60]

he's been doing it for ages, and I'd argue that the hard swerve into hyper-contrivance crossed with surrealism made the strip even better.

[non capisco]

The Terry Fuckwitt strip where he's walking down the corridor and 'forgets' to get bigger in the frame as he gets nearer is such an amazing joke.

[Senior Baiano]

It would be quite typical of Terry Fuckwitt to get himself drawn by the wrong fucking artist

[sheddyian]

I once submitted an idea that Terry Fuckwit should be the first strip in the comic, except he's not there. His dad, mum etc all say their lines, but there's just a gap where Terry should be.

Terry then turns up in all the other strips in the comic, saying his next line.

Yeah, shit idea

[Moj]

he's been doing it for ages, and I'd argue that the hard swerve into hyper-contrivance crossed with surrealism made the strip even better.

It's good, it's just a shock. Lew Stringer doing Felix and his Amazing Underpants is pretty much a perfect combination, so its not as if I'm against change.

For me, the best Terry Fuckwitt is the one with the constant confusion between arse doctor and chip shop. The bloke in the queue in the chip shop just interjecting with "Hey, I don't want any chips if they've been anywhere near his arse" kills me, every time.

[Video Game Fan 2000]

he's been doing it for ages, and I'd argue that the hard swerve into hyper-contrivance crossed with surrealism made the strip even better.

the arse/hole in the ground one, and the world cup tickets are both great for this reason

[ThaBiggPaybacc]

I once submitted an idea that Terry Fuckwit should be the first strip in the comic, except he's not there. His dad, mum etc all say their lines, but there's just a gap where Terry should be.

There was one kind of like that, where it starts with Terry's parents bemoaning their fuckwitted son being late for his own comic strip. It then takes us next door, and the rest of it's a Biffa Bacon strip instead.

[idunnosomename]

It's good, it's just a shock. Lew Stringer doing Felix and his Amazing Underpants is pretty much a perfect combination, so its not as if I'm against change.

For me, the best Terry Fuckwitt is the one with the constant confusion between arse doctor and chip shop. The bloke in the queue in the chip shop just interjecting with "Hey, I don't want any chips if they've been anywhere near his arse" kills me, every time.

hardly anything that happens in this is Terry's fault, he's completely being gaslit and tormented by the world he's in. especially like how there's a "hard cut" of the Windcock thief turning into the completely-differently dressed vicar at the end. made as obvious it can be by using the coloured ink for the former's clothes while the vicar is in black and white

[Gurke and Hare]

ARSE CLINIC

[Red82]

Terry Fuckwitt is the best thing Viz has ever done. So many memories.

[Langdale]

There's a Terry Fuckwitt strip where the final panel has him upside down and being used as a golf bag; roller skates on his hands and a load of golf-clubs stuck out of his arse while being pulled along by his feet. I think I laughed for about an hour at it.

[Blumf]

Terry's hairdo appears to be dreads, is that a comment on Victor Lewis-Smith?

[The Bumlord]

[madhair60]

[Sebastian Cobb]

[Senior Baiano]

Big fan of when Andy McCluskey from OMD wrote into Viz to deny that he used to wank off in an art cupboard at school

Possible I dreamt it as can't find any trace online, but I'm pretty sure it happened

[Ferris]

I think my favourite top tip format is the 'CONVINCE people' ones where it's something really pointless/trivial.

Catching up on this thread. These are absolutely my favourite as well - something about the combination of ludicrous solutions to non-existent problems gets me every time.

[Moj]

Big fan of when Andy McCluskey from OMD wrote into Viz to deny that he used to wank off in an art cupboard at school

Possible I dreamt it as can't find any trace online, but I'm pretty sure it happened

There's also a letter from a schoolfriend of Paul Weller discussing the Modfather's schoolboy wanking habits. The subheading above the letter reads "Weller Weller Weller Weller Ugh! Tell me more, tell me more..."

[Johnboy]

oh dear, I'm going to have to gather all those Terry Fuckwitt strips, just brilliant

[madhair60]

oh dear, I'm going to have to gather all those Terry Fuckwitt strips, just brilliant

i'm planning to attempt this myself

[Poirots BigGarlickyCorpse]

"you really are a trio of utter cockwits"

[Ignatius_S]

The long strips don't have a great payoff usually, and that's kind of the point. The fun is usually in the journey, rather than the destination. You don't read a Raffles The Gentleman Thug to see what happens to him at the end, you read it for modern ideas of vulgarity and violence rendered in ersatz Edwardian dialogue. For example.

Donald Sinden in 'There Goes my Knighthood' is a glorious exception to that rule.  How everything combines together for the ending is simply wonderful.