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March 28, 2024, 03:46:50 PM

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Cab Men II: Because fact into doubt won't go

Started by Fambo Number Mive, March 29, 2018, 09:48:16 AM

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JesusAndYourBush

Quote from: seepage on July 24, 2022, 06:08:55 PMcum valet

Presumably he does his (or her, don't want to be sexist) thing after the penis butler has butled it!

Des Wigwam

Quote from: gilbertharding on June 29, 2022, 10:23:26 AMI read once about the fact that most cargo ships even now carry a few passengers, and that this can be an excellent way to travel, provided you aren't in a hurry. I come from a long line of merchant navy officers, so was caught up in the picturesque potential of this idea - until I found out how expensive the tickets were.

I come from a very short line of merchant seamen. Not officers. My grandfather left a reserved occupation to join the merchant navy in WWII. My dad's theory is that he thought pleasure boating on trips to Rhyl in the 1930s looked a cushy number. I don't think the north atlantic convoys lived up to his expectations.
Apart from the cost of those tickets - how do you think the crew would regard you (not you personally)?


Des Wigwam

I have a positive mention for the thread. It's essentially a rip-off of a Bob's Burgers sort of bit but Birds Eye's plant range got a laugh out of me just now.

Cartoon mum and daughter sitting on a park bench talking about plant based nuggets and how they're not bad to chickens. The Kristen Schaal-daughter asks: "Why don't we have those mummy? Is it because you fear change? Is it because it will always be remembered as the time mum tried something new?"

8/10. Would recommend.

gilbertharding

Quote from: Sebastian Cobb on July 23, 2022, 02:49:40 PMHow on earth did Direct Line afford to get Tessa Thompson in for that guardians advert where she swans around Brighton, and why did she say yes, christ.

Holy shit - is she someone? It were wasted on me: I spent the first few distracted viewings thinking she was a member of Judi Dench's Money Super Seven gone solo.

Sebastian Cobb

Quote from: gilbertharding on July 27, 2022, 09:14:19 AMHoly shit - is she someone? It were wasted on me: I spent the first few distracted viewings thinking she was a member of Judi Dench's Money Super Seven gone solo.

Yeah she's been in a fair bit - Sorry to Bother You and played a shark of an executive in Westworld. Not really sure about the superhero stuff.

gilbertharding

Quote from: Sebastian Cobb on July 27, 2022, 09:35:30 AMYeah she's been in a fair bit - Sorry to Bother You and played a shark of an executive in Westworld. Not really sure about the superhero stuff.

Fair enough! I never claimed to have my finger on the pulse.

Des Wigwam

Quote from: Bad Ambassador on July 24, 2022, 01:18:06 PMThat new Weetabix "three little pigs" ad is crazy. The wolf wants to eat the pigs even though he's already had his Weetabix, and the box is the only thing in his satchel, so the wheat biscuits gibve him the strength to blow down houses and kill the residents. The final shot of him sitting under the tree with a full stomach assumes the wolf is the hero of this story. It's like it was done by a losing team on The Apprentice. And the animation is so oddly old-fashioned I was expecting a red car and a blue car to be having a race in the background.

Yes - I could see what they were going for style-wise I suppose. But my lasting thoughts having seen it 3 or 4 times are: so, those characters at the beginning are dead now? Did he still want to eat even though he'd eaten Weetabix? Wjy haven't they explicitly had the three pigs living happily in the background and the full wolf settled under the tree next to an empty bowl and spoon and packet of Weetabix.

The wolf being the hero is dead on - the pigs look like they were drawn by someone in the Third Reich art department who was let go because he wasn't quite "getting the look we're aiming for with some of these caricatures".

Lisa Jesusandmarychain

Quote from: Des Wigwam on July 28, 2022, 07:25:07 AMYes - I could see what they were going for style-wise I suppose. But my lasting thoughts having seen it 3 or 4 times are: so, those characters at the beginning are dead now?

I find this objectionable, too. Reminds me of that Carling Lager ad from the late Loaded lads era, the one with the feller what finds himself washed up on a desert island with a broken freezer full of aforesaid piss-weak drink. A friendly crab helps him get the freezer working, so Laddison Crusoe can have his drink nice and chilled, then the ungrateful cunt eats the crab, having killed it beforehand orbviously, although we the viewers don't get to see the crab killing, just the eating. We, the humble viewers are supposed to find this amusing. That advert always pissed me off. I Annie being a crab- loving child and seeing that ad, you'd be fucking traumatised.

Poobum

Who is Sally Nugent and why will I be amazed when I see her partner?

Bently Sheds

On a similar note; why would I be heartbroken to see what an EastEnders actress from the 1990s looks like now?

Icehaven

There's a McDonald's ad promoting their rewards app where a truck driver is apparently too tight to buy his wife a McChicken burger so he buys himself loads of McDonald's food until he's got enough points to get a free one. I genuinely can't work out if that's the joke or they're trying to say it's romantic. And it'd be stone cold.

Des Wigwam

Quote from: Icehaven on August 12, 2022, 10:33:17 AMAnd it'd be stone cold.
Thank you! First time I saw that ad there was a pause and I said "that'll be horrible by the time she eats it". Now I say "That'll be stone cold" every time - to everyone's delight.

Watched the Weetabix ad with someone who was seeing it for the first time last night and unprompted they said "so ... are the pigs dead?"

Des Wigwam

I've been taken off Cunard's list for a cruise and Numan are now back to flogging me boner pills. They're also trying to get me to send them vials of blood to test which will be free if they find nothing. I can only imagine this is all a massive future data harvesting thing for medical insurance companies to buy as well as being able to find common anomalies for which they can sell me pharmaceuticals (assuming they've not taken them all themselves). 

gilbertharding

Also making a slight return: That Kenco berk on the bicycle, with the hair and the velvet blazer. Stop trying to make 'cofficcianado' happen, Steve! No-one who even pretends to know anything about coffee would touch instant, no matter how much you charge for it.

That advert though: Tell me it was originally made with a Dutch voiceover.

Is there a term for that kind of advert, which was obviously made to be shown in dozens of territories, which seem to be set precisely nowhere? It's even better if there's dubbed dialogue, so the lips don't synch... but you only notice on the third watch. I'm thinking Uncanny Valley... is it that?

gilbertharding

And who's the bird who keeps trying to sell me Fairy laundry detergent, by referring to her little Leo Theo? Are we supposed to know who she is?

#fake edit# Ah - she's married to one of Made in Chelsea, and divorced from one of Westlife. I'm sure she also has a totally valid career of her own.

#another fake edit# I see she once used a newspaper column to call for the internment without trial of thousands of British Muslims. Brave of Procter and Gamble to give her such a high profile gig. What do you have to do to get cancelled by the woke mob these days?

JesusAndYourBush

Quote from: gilbertharding on August 19, 2022, 04:31:40 PMAlso making a slight return: That Kenco berk...

I still remember the old slogan of "If you're au fait with coffee you're OK with Kenko".

Bently Sheds

That EON ad where some old David Bellamy faced cunt is telling us they're singlehandedly saving the glaciers in a foreign accent. Then it cuts to a woman who's been dubbed worse than in the Calgon adverts, but with a foreign accent. If they're dubbing her, why not go for a Penelope Keith or (in a Eurotrash style) a Worzels accent?

gilbertharding

Very odd advert at the moment, which might have been mentioned here - anyway, it's for equity release.

Features the following visual images: a man literally juggling flaming torches. A man literally leaping from an aeroplane. And this is an advert *for* placing yourself and all your worldly goods in hock to a flybynight huckster reputable financial institution. Waiting for the sequel where he places his head in the lion's mouth, before going for a blindfold walk on the M25.

Almost makes you respect advertising creatives...

monkfromhavana

Quote from: gilbertharding on August 22, 2022, 04:56:21 PMVery odd advert at the moment, which might have been mentioned here - anyway, it's for equity release.

Features the following visual images: a man literally juggling flaming torches. A man literally leaping from an aeroplane. And this is an advert *for* placing yourself and all your worldly goods in hock to a flybynight huckster reputable financial institution. Waiting for the sequel where he places his head in the lion's mouth, before going for a blindfold walk on the M25.

Almost makes you respect advertising creatives...

At least it doesn't have Kevin Whateley reading poetry so twee even Nationwide would reject it.

Captain Z

Speaking of adverts where you don't understand how the visuals are supposed to sell you the product, I heard the song "True Colours" the other day and it still reminds me of that quite terrifying Peugeot (which I only know after searching for it) shark attack advert from the late 90s.


As I piece of filmmaking I guess it's very effective, seeing as how it's stuck in my mind all those years. Two helpless youngsters alone in deep water, the futility of trying to fend off a great white, scarred mentally and physically for life.

Buy a Peugeot 406. What?

JesusAndYourBush

You obviously haven't heard the twee slow version of True Colours.  (Haven't a clue what it was advertising.)

Icehaven

Quote from: Captain Z on August 24, 2022, 11:04:43 AMSpeaking of adverts where you don't understand how the visuals are supposed to sell you the product, I heard the song "True Colours" the other day and it still reminds me of that quite terrifying Peugeot (which I only know after searching for it) shark attack advert from the late 90s.


As I piece of filmmaking I guess it's very effective, seeing as how it's stuck in my mind all those years. Two helpless youngsters alone in deep water, the futility of trying to fend off a great white, scarred mentally and physically for life.

Buy a Peugeot 406. What?

That is truly an example of what ends up on TV when no one round the table wants to admit it's bollocks and they don't get it. The bit at 0.36 with the heavily tattooed bloke holding the white cat apropros of nothing looks rather like my heavily tattooed other half when he's holding our mostly white cat, but it still doesn't make me want to buy a Peugeot though.

Sebastian Cobb

One they've been playing in the cinema that's been been annoying me is an overly-sentimental McDonald's advert about a lorry driver who wears loud shirts and misses his wife while he's away. It's all backed to Leon Bridges' Coming Home, which is a nice track, and nice soul tracks being plundered for ads annoys me anyway, but the bit that really does my lid in is he gets home and his loving wife quietly slides a big mac towards him as a welcome home gift, how does that work as a spontaneous gift? It's cold and soggy within seconds. Fuck off.

gilbertharding

I see the man with the unnaturally fixed smile previously seen in the "...and my lot know how to party..." funeral plan advert is now - presumably playing the same character - selling the benefits of Verisure burglar alarms.

I presumed the backstory from the earlier adverts was that he had a terminal illness he was keeping secret from his family, so it's nice to see he's still around.

Icehaven

Quote from: Sebastian Cobb on August 27, 2022, 01:32:35 PMOne they've been playing in the cinema that's been been annoying me is an overly-sentimental McDonald's advert about a lorry driver who wears loud shirts and misses his wife while he's away. It's all backed to Leon Bridges' Coming Home, which is a nice track, and nice soul tracks being plundered for ads annoys me anyway, but the bit that really does my lid in is he gets home and his loving wife quietly slides a big mac towards him as a welcome home gift, how does that work as a spontaneous gift? It's cold and soggy within seconds. Fuck off.

Is that the same one I mentioned above? If so it's actually him giving her a burger that he's got for free with McD's loyalty points he earned by buying himself loads of food. What a generous soul. If it's not the same ad then it's probably time to sack their ad agency.

Des Wigwam

Quote from: Icehaven on August 31, 2022, 11:56:09 PMIs that the same one I mentioned above? If so it's actually him giving her a burger that he's got for free with McD's loyalty points he earned by buying himself loads of food. What a generous soul. If it's not the same ad then it's probably time to sack their ad agency.

I'm coming round to your way of thinking that the shitty cold burger offering is a little in-joke between the two of them - that it acknowledges his sacrifice of nights away with only the rough trade of provincial towns for comfort and shitting in service station car parks. But now he's back to their really quite nicely appointed bungalow and pointedly hippyish life together. I bet the neighbours love that rig parked out on the street when he's home.

Apart from everything else that's wrong about the ad I thought fast food places sort of pushed a moderation attitude in flogging their food. Not that they want to discourage people from buying all their food there but who wants to be a butterball family relentlessly stuffing their faces meal in - meal out? He is literally sitting in his cab surrounded by empty wrappers and grease throughout.

monkfromhavana

Quote from: gilbertharding on August 30, 2022, 03:05:05 PMI see the man with the unnaturally fixed smile previously seen in the "...and my lot know how to party..." funeral plan advert is now - presumably playing the same character - selling the benefits of Verisure burglar alarms.

I presumed the backstory from the earlier adverts was that he had a terminal illness he was keeping secret from his family, so it's nice to see he's still around.

I clocked that too, I was hoping he had died though.

Des Wigwam

Am in a hotel for a couple of days this week so get to see live TV ads.

Have only seen one equity release ad so far. Can't believe that market is (literally and figuratively) dead. It's from a company that bills itself as the UK's no 1 equity release partnership (or somesuch vague wording). The branding has all the low key stylings of a legit charity / NGO so pound to a penny it's a disguise for a bunch of morally bankrupt money grubbers. As ever, hope I'm wrong.

New kid on the block seems to be charities asking for legacies in wills. Had seen on catchup that the RNLI had basically done an infomercial about it and I thought - wow that's a long ad. Now there must be 3 per ad break from different charities.

Got to go - The Sweeney is starting again so I've got a couple of hours saying - "ahh that's ... ahh what's his/her name? They've been in loads of things".

mippy

Have been in Canada for a week, which made watching US TV interesting as a professional advertising pedant. Lots of ads showing sports betting as a good thing to do when bored.

dissolute ocelot

I keep getting adverts for Coutts Wealth Management, both on All 4 and online, so evidently I am either a millionaire or royalty.