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Chris PINCHer…Private MEMBERS’ club…no…please make the puns stop!

Started by Paul Calf, July 01, 2022, 08:24:11 AM

Previous topic - Next topic

Zero Gravitas

Quote from: Fambo Number Mive on July 03, 2022, 09:12:46 AMMail on Sunday alleges that Johnson knew of allegations about Pincher two years ago.

Or as The Mirror puts it:


Fambo Number Mive

I hate how even newspapers that are meant to be centre-left still call him "Boris". Even if he was put on trial many media outlets would still be calling him by his first name, which I don't think has happened to any other prime minister since Thatcher.

Johnny Yesno

Quote from: Fambo Number Mive on July 03, 2022, 11:53:39 AMI hate how even newspapers that are meant to be centre-left still call him "Boris". Even if he was put on trial many media outlets would still be calling him by his first name, which I don't think has happened to any other prime minister since Thatcher.

It's not his first name and his family don't call him Boris.


Fambo Number Mive

Quote from: Johnny Yesno on July 03, 2022, 08:54:32 PMIt's not his first name and his family don't call him Boris.

Good point, his first name is Alexander. I presume that is what his family call him.

Johnny Yesno

Quote from: Fambo Number Mive on July 04, 2022, 10:06:59 AMGood point, his first name is Alexander. I presume that is what his family call him.

According to his sister, it's that or Al. Never Boris. Boris is just for us plebs via the tory media machine.

falafel

Quote from: Fambo Number Mive on July 03, 2022, 11:53:39 AMI hate how even newspapers that are meant to be centre-left still call him "Boris". Even if he was put on trial many media outlets would still be calling him by his first name, which I don't think has happened to any other prime minister since Thatcher.

So you're saying you'd prefer the Mirror to say "JOHNSON'S MISSED CHANCES TO PROBE PINCHER"

bgmnts


JamesTC

Johnson has accidentally left Mr Pinchy in a hot bath and cooked him. He is very apologetic but is now eating him as he insists "it is what he would have wanted".

jobotic


idunnosomename

Oh! Mr Pinchy, what have you done
There once were lots of bums to slap
But soon there will be none
I'll have to have a wank
Before I go on Andrew Marr
Oh Mr Pinchy what a naughty man you are!

The Mollusk


Mobius


Psybro

The only time I've been to Tamworth was freezing my arse for an hour on the platform at the station due to a delay, I knew then that their MP must be a sex predator.

The Mollusk

Quote from: Psybro on July 04, 2022, 12:15:04 PMThe only time I've been to Tamworth was freezing my arse for an hour on the platform at the station due to a delay, I knew then that their MP must be a sex predator.

That wasn't jack frost nipping at your nose mate let me tell you!!!! It waS PINCHE


Flouncer

No. 10 now saying that Bozo was aware of specific reports on Pincher's behaviour, and is alleged to have used the phrase, "Pincher by name, pincher by nature," in a private conversation about him.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-politics-62039540

So already we've gone from, "I wasn't aware of specific allegations about him," to "I was aware of specific allegations but those allegations had either been resolved or were not the subject of a formal complaint." My partner's ex was like this; they'll tell an ovbious, whopping great lie about something, then if you grill them about it for hours they incrementally admit to small parts of the lie, but you have to doggedly drag every little bit out of them in a long, drawn out process.

Alberon

It's the same every fucking time with Johnson. Every fucking time!

The election of new officers for the 1922 committee is on Wednesday. This can only help focus the minds of rebels.

bgmnts

Chronic lying is probably the least of his misdeeds really but nobody cares about lying anymore.

With this "Pincher by name, pincher by nature" quote, I'm enjoying the parallels to the big scandal in Succession with Uncle "Mo" Lester.

QuoteWilla: I am so sorry for your loss, Maria. You know, I never met Mo, but I heard that he was just a great guy.
Maria: Um, Mo?
Willa: Your husband?
Connor: We're so sorry. [whispering to Willa] His name's not Mo.
Willa: What? You called him Mo.
Connor: His name's Lester.
Willa: OK. So why does everyone call him Mo?
Connor: His real name is Lester! It was, I guess I haven't thought about it in a while, but it was kind of a joke.
Willa: Like what?
Connor: Mo-lester. I guess it wasn't a very nice joke.
Will: And was he one?
Connor: Oh! God not. Just, old Mr. Fiddlesticks. Uncle Meathands. Dad wouldn't let us in the pool with him. But you know, the guys of that generation? It was a different time.


Bennett Brauer

Quote from: Bennett Brauer on July 01, 2022, 05:40:39 PMChapman Pincher.

[That's one for the teenagers]

Quote from: Clatty McCutcheon on July 04, 2022, 01:45:12 PMTheir Trade is Lechery

Very good.

I used to get Chapman Pincher mixed up with James Rusbridger, both British writers and experts in espionage who wrote frequent articles in the press.
I just have to remember that one of them died at the age of 100 surrounded by his family and the other died at 65 wearing an oilskin coat and a gas mask while suspended by a rope connecting his neck and ankles to a set of pulleys. 

Quote from: Bennett Brauer on July 04, 2022, 11:34:24 PMI used to get Chapman Pincher mixed up with James Rusbridger, both British writers and experts in espionage who wrote frequent articles in the press.
I just have to remember that one of them died at the age of 100 surrounded by his family and the other died at 65 wearing an oilskin coat and a gas mask while suspended by a rope connecting his neck and ankles to a set of pulleys. 

To be honest, the name Chapman Pincher is only really familiar to me because my dad has had a copy of Their Trade is Treachery on his bookshelf for forty-odd years, and it's the kind of name/title that sticks in your head - evidently it's all being building up to that pun popping into my head on a Monday afternoon in 2022 after a Tory sex scandal story.

Flouncer

Oh dear, looks like Bunter's lies have got him into another scrape.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-politics-62047883

Lord McDonald says that Johnson was personally briefed about an investigation into Pincher's behaviour, both at the opening and the conclusion of the investigation - the complaint was upheld; Pincher apologised for his behaviour and promised not to do it again.

Labour have been granted an urgent question at 12.30, so it's about to be discussed in the house.

Cold Meat Platter

Saying you're not going to do something again but then doing it again anyway is a classic cunt's trick.

Buntus Maximus

Flouncer

Bunter has sent some cunt out to spout a load of waffle on his behalf, saying that he was briefed but subsequently forgot about it, and that it would have been unfair to the pervert to exclude him from the position based on unsubstantiated rumours.

jobotic

Johnson's on a phone call to Ukraine. As he always is when he's in trouble (which I'd like to see him get out of this time!!!)

Does Zelenskky really love Johnson so much or has he been told it's a condition of his support?

Flouncer

He's just slavering on now, about "natural justice" and how important it is for perverts to be given the benefit of the doubt until it's conclusively proven that they're perverts.

Give him a break. How can you expect him to remember things or do due diligence or listen to his advisors or his wife when he's so busy getting on with the job of delivering what matters to the British people?


Flouncer

He's now saying that all the parties should be on the same side in this and that Labour shouldn't be taking the moral high ground, without acknowledging that three tory MPs in the last few months have been [locked up for noncing/caught wanking at work/have been the subject of multiple complaints of sexual harrassment].