I'm off to Hollywood!

[Pink Gregory]

F E R R I W O O D

[kalowski]

Is this a pop at my accent? Because that is not on.

Just preparing you for Nicola Sturgeon and not Nicholas Cage.

[Glebe]

*STOP THE PRESS!* Ferris has been papped in Beverley Hills with a mysterious new lady! Will it be wedding bells soon? Stay tooned!

[kalowski]

Hollywood? More like Wallywood!

[Ferris]

I cannot deny it.

[Elderly Sumo Prophecy]

Where the FRIG is my Tizer?

[Glebe]

Just hoping there's no vengeful Wonkas there!

[Ferris]

Where the FRIG is my Tizer?

Customs took it but they said they'd give it back later.

[popcorn]

There he is... with his signature pink baseball bat.s.

[frajer]

Ferris, FERRIS, would you care to comment on the rumour that you're playing one of the new Kens in Barbie 2?

[Ferris]

Let's just say... I am doing that.

[popcorn]

Ferris plays coy

[kalowski]

Are you going to masturbate underneath the famous Hollywood sign?

Let's just say... I am doing that.

[Glebe]

BREAKING SHOWBIZ NEWS!

Ferris has been arrested for trying to cop off with a prozzie!

[frajer]

The fake tan, the fancy shoes, the green hair. You've changed mate.

[Glebe]

Could Hollywood Ferris just be a bad AI experience? YOU decide!

YOU are the hero!

[touchingcloth]

I'm off to Haddawood.

[Glebe]

I'm off to Haddawood.

Baby don't hurt me

[kalowski]

Could Hollywood Ferris just be a bad AI experience? YOU decide!

YOU are the hero!

Ferris always dreamed of making it big in Hollywood. With his heart set on stardom, he packed his bags and headed west, full of hope and excitement.

Arriving in the city of dreams, Ferris strutted down Hollywood Boulevard, taking in the sights and sounds of the bustling streets. He was determined to make a name for himself in the entertainment industry, no matter what it took.

As Ferris wandered around, he couldn't help but notice the glitz and glamour surrounding him. Determined to fit in, he decided to audition for a talent agency he stumbled upon.

Confidently, Ferris marched into the audition room and declared, "I'm here to be the next big thing!"

The casting director raised an eyebrow, unimpressed. "Alright, show us what you've got," she said, trying to hide her skepticism.

Ferris cleared his throat and began his performance. Unfortunately, his rendition of Shakespeare's Hamlet was more reminiscent of a poorly rehearsed school play than a professional audition. He stumbled over his lines, mixing up famous quotes and forgetting crucial plot points.

The casting director exchanged a look with her colleagues, trying to stifle their laughter. Ferris, unaware of his disastrous audition, finished with a dramatic flourish and awaited their applause.

Instead, there was silence.

Feeling dejected, Ferris slumped out of the audition room, his dreams of stardom crumbling around him. As he wandered back onto the streets of Hollywood, he couldn't help but feel a little foolish.

But Ferris was determined not to give up. Despite his initial setback, he knew that with a little perseverance and maybe a few acting classes, he could still make his mark in Tinseltown. And who knows? Maybe one day, he'd look back on this moment and laugh at his own naivety.

[Ferris]

It was Othello. I don't do Hamlet because he's a bit... you know.

[Glebe]

I've been proved right!🫨

[Poobum]

My Florence Pugh has arrived thanks to someone 😉. Currently doing zoomies around the garden, they're always so happy.

[Ferris]

Had a few drinks so don't mind telling you all... fuckin... YESS

[Glebe]

Apparently the preview screening of Ferris' latest, Ferris 2: Ferris Strikes Again! went really badly!

[selectivememory]

He's been nominated for three Razzies (worst actor, worst director and worst screenplay), but I heard he's going to be a good sport about it and accept the awards in person. You'll get your hands on that Oscar gold next year Ferris mate, I'm sure of it.

[Glebe]

Meet Ferris' new manager! He's going to revitalise Ferris' career!



"As far as I'm concerned, the kid stays in the picture!" announces popcorn the Sheep! "This guy's got the chutzpah, he's gonna go far!"

[frajer]

Ferris hotly tipped!

Nothing to do with Hollywood, just unseasonably warm.

[popcorn]

He's so hot right now!

[selectivememory]

Think he might have a bit of a fever. Have a lie down, Ferris!

[Glebe]

He's so hot right now!

You can be too! Get that pop bubbling!