CRICKET 2023 (ASHES SPECIAL): REQUIEM FOR BAZBALL

[druss]

Well put another way, if you'd said to England at the start of the day that they'd take the last Australian wickets for fuck all and only be 138 behind with six wickets intact at close of play they'd be bazzing their balls off with glee. 

Honestly thought we might see a Smith double ton and still be 400 behind at close today. Not saying we bossed the day, we nearly totally fucked it near the end but taking the whole day into account we are in a far better position than we were at close yesterday.

[jobotic]

lmao went into a 45 min meeting 1 down, came out, turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a text from my dad saying ABJECT CUNTS so I knew we'd shit the bed.

My dad sent me a text saying AIDS TIER FIDDLER and he doesn't even follow cricket!

[MrMealDeal]

Continue to discuss the 4-1 Ashes series victory for Australia against Ben Stokes' Bat and Ball Bongo Brainboxes.

I am disappointed that we didn't go through the whole of 2023 still posting on the old 2022 thread

[rjd2]

If Duckett pointlessly chasing a short one and getting out on 98 during an Ashes test at Lords is a winning mentality then good luck to him. The only thing he'd be winning if I was captain would be a roundhouse kick to the jaw in the sheds for being such a thick-brained cunt. Grind them down. Mash them up. Destroy them. Don't gift them fuck all.

Duckett while "showing intent" with the short stuff wasn't actually scoring runs and even if he had somehow got his century was dead man walking. The Root innings still boils my piss, he had a lifeline with the no ball but was way to frenetic, his role was to do a Smith and grind them into the ground and then the fun begins.

[poo]

Fair dos for getting back into the match but god, they're thick as cunting pigshit aren't they.

[Quote]

Lol.

[poo]

FFS just set fire to everything

[Cuellar]

STOKESBAZ

[druss]

Should have hit it for six.

[Cuellar]

Why don't the crowd organise a chant of "STOP FLAILING AT SHORT BALLS YOU TWATS"

Someone's got to tell them

[Thursday]

Must be one of the least assured 50's I've seen since... Crawley in the last match.

It wouldn't be so bad going after the short ball, if they actually hit it properly once.

[Quote]

Dear God.

[druss]

Pathetic.

[Cuellar]

This is amazing stuff

[dontpaintyourteeth]

lol. lmao.

[poo]

Gravelly dogshit covered in burnt pubes.

[dontpaintyourteeth]

short ball again is it lads. braindead

[Bobby Treetops]

BAZBALLS just means being fucking stupid at cricket.

[robhug]

what will the repercussions be if england dont go on to win this game?

1) they won a crucial toss and got to bowl in advantages conditons
2) their first innings coincided with glorious sunshine and very advantageous batting conditions
3) the oppositions most experienced bowler hobbles off very early in said first innings and plays no further part in the game

if you cant win in these circumstances lads...

[pierre boo-lez]

what will the repercussions be if england dont go on to win this game?

Nothing. Nothing will change, they'll just say they're still going to play like witless fucking morons because it's "saving test cricket" and it "usually works".

Agnew and Vaughan will have a little woe is me moan about the state of it, but the first time England bat next week they'll be back to giving them sloppy blowjobs on air like a pair of hypocritical cunts.

[Quote]

Losing your most important series, (if we do) whilst making an endless succession of braindead decisions that squander the advantage isn't all that entertaining, for me. Call me a traditionalist.

It is funny admittedly.

[rjd2]

That was one of the worst test fifties you will see from Brook.

Need to somehow get to 350 here.

[gilbertharding]

Well put another way, if you'd said to England at the start of the day that they'd take the last Australian wickets for fuck all and only be 138 behind with six wickets intact at close of play they'd be bazzing their balls off with glee. 

Yes, yes this is true.

*logs on to Cricinfo to see how the third day's going* Oh my.

[druss]

Unfortunately a good second day doesn't guarantee a non-aids third day.

[druss]

Hahahahahahaha amazing.

[rjd2]

More intent needed .

[robhug]

england batsmen convinced the aussies are going to drop simple catches so try out the theory by just popping them gently up for them

[poo]

Fuck these absolute pricks

[gilbertharding]

It's a good job it's 2023 and we (on this forum, anyway) are far too enlightened to just be shouting 'Spazz-ball more like' at each other all day because...

[trabuch]

Brainless, artless guff.