Stealing from the supermarket

[Jerzy Bondov]

These fucking shops like Lidl, B&M and Home Bargains where they make it hard to leave if you're not buying anything - with one-way in and out doors and gates across the unoccupied tills - STEAL EVERYTHING! Steal the fucking LOT!

[The Mollusk]

Lidl probably jacked their prices up when they became some ironically hilarious brand slapping their logo on sports socks and stuff, they're no better than the rest, fuck 'em.

Thanks @chip for acknowledging the other side. It is unfortunately not as black and white as you see it and sometimes in a bad, bad world you have to take at least an eyelash for an eye when the shit is stacked against you. There is nothing wrong with stealing from huge companies with unfathomable wealth.

Bottom line is do they owe us a living? Of course they fucking do.

[Buelligan]

If we're admitting bad behaviour in this thread, I'm going to come clean and tell you that my house absolutely HONKS of drugs at the mo. 

Not even my drugs either, some fucking pharmacist coming out on their holibobs ffs.  That is how honest and self-sacrificing I am. 

[The Mollusk]

As long as they weren't stolen from an independent dispensary I think it's okay

[Buelligan]

You say that but I think we can all agree, if we could only travel back in time to visit the independent dispensary owned by Rishi Sunak's pares, we'd be necking those drugs right in front of their tiny horrified faces and laugh our way up the road on it.  I dare anyone to deny it.

[Goldentony]

the cameras in the place by me pointed at the self serve have been off for months, the ones that show you your own horrible face? and frequently the security guard is around the corner smoking weed leaving the one viewing podium unoccupied and if I could figure out how to steal Lamb i'd print a copy of chip's post out and wank onto it til I passed out, it is THAT tempting to steal lamb like a fucking LAND BARON

[Goldentony]

I deserve lamb even if its immoral and all the other walls of texts from the other nightmare thread, I should be allowed to accrue lamb at the expense of Tesco

[colacentral]

In school we used to go to Asda for lunch. Get a whole cooked chicken from the back and walk out. Did that many times. Imagine the beginning of Goodfellas, it was basically like that.

[Midas]

The rise of the Lidl demi baguette from 22p to 35p over the last twelve months causes me to throb with fury

[Video Game Fan 2000]

my fathers house of worship
has become self-checkout

[Mrs Wogans lemon drizzle]

The wanker in charge of sainsburys who got caught whistling "we're in the money" when he thought he was off camera.  Fuck em

[Midas]

might start nicking nub ends

[Cuellar]

I wouldn't steal from a big supermarket, with all their cameras and legal departments, but the little independent places nearby, fine, absolutely.

[djtrees]

Rinse the fuck out of them. Any shop that has decided to chuck in 350 self service till and have one spotty herbert running around like a cunt needs to realise that they are getting fleeced constantly. Deffo by me, and hopefully by everyone else who goes in there. Team mollusc. Fuck you lily-livered handwaving chumps.

[djtrees]

Latest bargain was a pack of orzo from tezzies, and some feta cheese from the asda yesterday. Biggest bargain was a mirror from ikea.
Mate got a shed from b&q quite cheap as well.
Marvellous.
Fuck em.

[Midas]

Isn't it nice that they provide camera feeds so we can check ourselves out at the self-checkout

[madhair60]

all of my drugs were legally purchased from a "geezer"

[Brian Freeze]

Interested in the mechanics of the discount shed deal.

Just curious like, my shed needs refelting but will do that legally officer.

[Catalogue Trousers]

CHOON.

[Ron Superior]

When I was a kid I stole one individual hundred and thousand from the local KwikSave and I genuinely thought I was going to die in prison.

[TrenterPercenter]

I wouldn't steal from a big supermarket, with all their cameras and legal departments, but the little independent places nearby, fine, absolutely.

just pick off the olds nearby when they return with their little shopping carts

[Pink Gregory]

had anyone ever stolen a supermarket

just pinched one and driven it off

maybe it's still in the lock up

maybe the deal went south and there's a perfectly preserved 1998 Somerfields in a garage because it's too hot to shift

[Video Game Fan 2000]

When I was a kid I stole one individual hundred and thousand from the local KwikSave and I genuinely thought I was going to die in prison.

i walked out of a spar with a pack of sweets by mistake once and almost cried when i noticed

[flotemysost]

Have had the security guards come barrelling after me countless times when I've clean forgotten to pay at the self-checkouts.

I think the last intentional theft I can remember committing was a 1p coin, when I was about six or seven. Here's the really exciting bit though; it wasn't an actual coin, it was the pretend plastic currency they use in schools to teach you to count. Somehow infinitely more thrilling to have that burning a hole in my pocket rather than genuine legal tender.

[shiftwork2]

The cursory peer into my bags after being pulled over on a scan-as-you-go did make me think I could perhaps start stealing to order.  I would distribute the smoked salmon, whisky and profiteroles on one of the days freed up by not having to work full time.  My fame would grow as a champion of social justice, stealing luxury items from Waitrose for those who could well afford them but would actually rather pay 50%.  But nah I'd get caught sooner rather than later.

[dontpaintyourteeth]

Call me a risk-averse cunt but I just know I'd get caught the first time I attempted it

[Oh, Nobody]

Mini Sainsburys I pass on the way to work has 2-3 teens working usually nattering away to each other about their drunken exploits, and the weighing scales on the self serves are fucked. I'm more choc hazelnut croissant than man at this point.

[Jerrykeshton]

I quite like typing "Just nick it" on the A-Z look up on the fruit and veg scales in Sainsbury's and Tesco

[Midas]

Never been one of those that stop and get all flustered when the shop alarm goes off

Just keep walking! It's probably NOWT

[PaulTMA]

It's great, isn't it?