Tip jar

If you like CaB and wish to support it, you can use PayPal or KoFi. Thank you, and I hope you continue to enjoy the site - Neil.

Buy Me a Coffee at ko-fi.com

Support CaB

Recent

Welcome to Cook'd and Bomb'd. Please login or sign up.

March 28, 2024, 11:21:37 PM

Login with username, password and session length

What Non-New Films Have You Seen? (2021 Edition)

Started by zomgmouse, January 14, 2021, 11:12:22 AM

Previous topic - Next topic

phantom_power

Quote from: Small Man Big Horse on October 22, 2021, 10:38:50 AM
I read about that afterwards but have to admit I didn't spot him at the time.



He plays a policeman who, if I remember correctly, checks some papers

Small Man Big Horse

Quote from: phantom_power on October 22, 2021, 10:48:55 AM
He plays a policeman who, if I remember correctly, checks some papers

Once I read the description I realsied

The Rescuers Down Under (1990) - Ms Bianca and Bernard are back but this time they have to head to Australia to save a young boy from evil poacher George C. Scott. Bernard plans to propose to Ms Bianca as she doesn't believe in sex before marriage, but every time he does he's irritatingly interrupted, and he worries a horny Australian mouse called Jake might steal her away from him. It's a very slight film, with a bland script and average action scenes, I have to admit I wasn't a huge fan of the first film but this is even more simplistic, disappointingly song free, and largely dull and predictable. 4.7/10


Egyptian Feast

Devil's Due (2014) Another Poundland classic, presumably a stocking filler from a recent Xmas. I had no idea what to expect and the opening passage from the book of John promising 'many antichrists' was promising, but I was immediately disappointed to find out it was yet another 'prick with a camcorder who just won't ever put it fucking down even when it is clearly extremely inconsiderate and rude, such as when they're visiting a priest who's just pished blood out of every orifice in hospital, for fuck's sake' movie. Camcorder cunt gets married, goes on honeymoon in Dominican Republic, cultists recognise camcorder wife as the prophesied 'first of many', Satan gets her pregnant, she starts being a bit weird, nobody notices at first because camcorder people are too busy filming every fucking thing they do to review their footage, etc. It's basically Rosemary's Baby meets Paranormal Activity.

The film is full of camcorder people, in fact Satan's diabolical plan of breeding lots of antichrists appears to entirely rely on them, so even when this cunt isn't filming some other cunt is, including some victims of the deermunching wife of the protagonist. Halfway through, the cult sneak in and stick CCTV cameras all over their gaff, so camcorder cunt doesn't realise he's on video even when he doesn't want to be on video, which is admittedly rarely but serves him right.

The funniest bit is when she goes all Come To Daddy at a child in night vision (camcorder people really love filming in the dark for some reason, which explains the bit of the Paris Hilton sex tape I saw), but the best scene, which I'm afraid I will have to spoil for you, is CCTV of her in the supermarket staring at the meat display for ages then taking a tray of mince and stuffing it in her face while a kid looks on. It's so good I was disappointed later when the couple was shopping and they didn't go near a butcher's. More of that and this would be a solid 5/10.

That reminded me of a German tourist who stayed in my mum's youth hostel for a while. Apparently she used to go to the butcher's every day, get a pound of mince in brown paper wrapping and walk down Letterkenny High Street eating it like chips.

Inspector Norse

Inside Man A SPIKE LEE JOINT from 2006 with a heavy-duty cast in a heavy-duty heist suspense thriller cracker: Clive Owen's criminal mastermind leads a crew of four or five on a fiendishly clever bank robbery only they don't seem that bothered about grabbing any cash. Denzel Washington is the possibly-dirty cop tasked with negotiating after Owen and co take a load of hostages. Jodie Foster gets equal top billing despite only being in half a dozen scenes as some kind of political fixer who everyone seems to regard as a genius even though she doesn't seem very competent on this film's evidence. The film also makes room for Christopher Plummer as the smarmy bank XO, but wastes Willem Dafoe (crotchety cop vet) and Chiwetel Ejiofor (Washington's breast-fixated sidekick) a tad. The two-hour running time crackles by as we essentially get the robbery from start to finish, with a little bit of closure at the end. The action is pacey, the drama is taut, the plotting smartly subverts expectations, and the ending is a bit wishy-washy (
Spoiler alert
especially the "nobody got hurt, everybody goes home happy" angle which glosses over the 50 people who have just been traumatised for life by being tied up and held hostage by armed robbers for 24 hours)
[close]
.

Blumf

Quote from: Inspector Norse on October 23, 2021, 11:10:06 PM
Inside Man

...Jodie Foster gets equal top billing despite only being in half a dozen scenes as some kind of political fixer who everyone seems to regard as a genius even though she doesn't seem very competent on this film's evidence.

Nobody thinks she's a genius, they just know she knows where all the bodies are buried and thus can broker deals with the powerful.

Otherwise I think you're right on the film. It's always one I enjoy watching. Did you like Denzel's impromptu Segway ride when
Spoiler alert
the hostage is 'killed'
[close]
, and the weirdly naff middle finger post production insert?

Egyptian Feast

It's Alive (1974) The 2009 remake, which looks shit, is lurking near the top of the unwatched DVD pile, so I had to make sure we caught the original first. John Ryan and Sharon Farrell are eagerly awaiting their second child, but when she goes into labour she feels like something is horribly wrong. The doctor ignores her and is promptly slaughtered, along with the other staff in the delivery room, by the fanged monstrosity (Rick Baker's girlfriend in a rubber suit) she gives birth to. The killer baby goes on the run, hotly pursued by squadrons of armed police, nibbling on the odd milkman or neighbour on his way home. A representative of the company that manufactures the birth control pills Farrell was using requests that the baby is completely annihilated when finally tracked down, so it can't be studied too closely...

It's a ridiculous premise, but Cohen and the cast absolutely commit to it. Ryan is fantastic as the father of the monstrosity (as he describes it), struggling to cope with the notoriety, media intrusion and conflicting emotions about his beastly offspring. Cohen apparently wanted a mini-Psycho reunion of Perkins and Leigh as the unfortunate couple, which would've been interesting, but I really can't see Perkins doing a better job than Ryan, who takes this amusing satirical horror flick to another level. It's really quite moving by the end.

steveh

Seven Stages to Achieve Eternal Bliss by Passing Through the Gateway Chosen by the Holy Storsh (2018)

This is an odd one. Don't remember reading about it anywhere before stumbling onto it on Amazon either. A kind of horror comedy about a couple who move into a cheap LA apartment that turns out to have been previously home to a cult leader who killed himself in their bathtub and now his followers keep turning up so they too can commit ritual suicide and ascend to a higher plane. Good cast led by Kate Micucci and Matt Jones with Taika Waititi and Dan Harmon plus cameos from a whole bunch of comedy people. Decent concept and some very funny moments but it doesn't quite come together as a fully satisfying whole. Maybe just due to inexperience as I think it's the first feature length film of the writers and director.

SteveDave

Battleship

A film where a battleship does a handbreak turn.

Famous Mortimer

Rothrock Rothrock Rothrock

Lady Reporter

Evidently the idea of having a reporter who's also a woman is so unusual in Hong Kong they decided to make a movie about it. Kinda on the boring side, although it was fun seeing Jeffrey Falcon, star of Six String Samurai, as a goon.

Small Man Big Horse

The Jungle Book (1967) - Loved this as a kid, found it boring as a twentysomething, now I'm back to really liking it so what that says about me mentally probably shouldn't be examined too much in depth. It's an episodic affair as after hearing that evil tiger Shere Khan wants to eat young human Mowgli his panther pal Bagheera tries to guide him out of the jungle, meeting a different group of animals from time to time and they all have a lovely sing song,
Spoiler alert
before Mowgli kills the tiger
[close]
. Yay. 7.7/10

Shit Good Nose

Quote from: steveh on October 24, 2021, 09:49:19 AM
Seven Stages to Achieve Eternal Bliss by Passing Through the Gateway Chosen by the Holy Storsh (2018)

This is an odd one. Don't remember reading about it anywhere before stumbling onto it on Amazon either. A kind of horror comedy about a couple who move into a cheap LA apartment that turns out to have been previously home to a cult leader who killed himself in their bathtub and now his followers keep turning up so they too can commit ritual suicide and ascend to a higher plane. Good cast led by Kate Micucci and Matt Jones with Taika Waititi and Dan Harmon plus cameos from a whole bunch of comedy people. Decent concept and some very funny moments but it doesn't quite come together as a fully satisfying whole. Maybe just due to inexperience as I think it's the first feature length film of the writers and director.

Genuinely - GENUINELY - got this mixed up with Ghost Team.  Oh man...

sevendaughters

A Brighter Summer Day - Taiwanese film about youth gangs in the Chinese exile community in the early 60s, mirroring youth decline with the tenuous position in society felt by their parents. It is 4hr long but actually breezed through it in one sitting w/interval, mostly because it is really good and aimed at sentient adults. The actual story is not terribly dissimilar to West Side Story as it goes, only the songs that are in it are Chinese pop band playing Western songs on stage to affirm anti-communist sensibilities.

Chedney Honks

Quote from: sevendaughters on October 25, 2021, 10:30:27 AM
A Brighter Summer Day

An exceptional film, and one I'll start a thread on some day. I absolutely adored the cinematography and period details. Still not seen Yi Yi but it's sitting there waiting. Taipei Story is a bit trickier to get hold of but I'll pick it up at some point.

SteveDave

Quote from: steveh on October 24, 2021, 09:49:19 AM
Seven Stages to Achieve Eternal Bliss by Passing Through the Gateway Chosen by the Holy Storsh (2018)

This is an odd one. Don't remember reading about it anywhere before stumbling onto it on Amazon either. A kind of horror comedy about a couple who move into a cheap LA apartment that turns out to have been previously home to a cult leader who killed himself in their bathtub and now his followers keep turning up so they too can commit ritual suicide and ascend to a higher plane. Good cast led by Kate Micucci and Matt Jones with Taika Waititi and Dan Harmon plus cameos from a whole bunch of comedy people. Decent concept and some very funny moments but it doesn't quite come together as a fully satisfying whole. Maybe just due to inexperience as I think it's the first feature length film of the writers and director.

It does sort of peter off after 40 minutes doesn't it? The performances were good though and the boyfriends confession to the animated bird was really funny. I loved the song too. Written by The Flaming Lips it turns out. https://youtu.be/wuQS8HCVsEo

sevendaughters

Quote from: Chedney Honks on October 25, 2021, 12:28:41 PM
An exceptional film, and one I'll start a thread on some day. I absolutely adored the cinematography and period details. Still not seen Yi Yi but it's sitting there waiting. Taipei Story is a bit trickier to get hold of but I'll pick it up at some point.

I've just found out I have access to Kanopy and gonna watch Yi Yi at some point. Plenty of good stuff on there.

zomgmouse

Quote from: sevendaughters on October 25, 2021, 10:30:27 AM
A Brighter Summer Day - Taiwanese film about youth gangs in the Chinese exile community in the early 60s, mirroring youth decline with the tenuous position in society felt by their parents. It is 4hr long but actually breezed through it in one sitting w/interval, mostly because it is really good and aimed at sentient adults. The actual story is not terribly dissimilar to West Side Story as it goes, only the songs that are in it are Chinese pop band playing Western songs on stage to affirm anti-communist sensibilities.

I know what you mean by breezing through, I watched it in a cinema with no interval and it did not feel like 4hrs. Really spectacular.

Pink Gregory

The Frighteners

I'm very picky with my enjoyable romp films, but I really liked this.  Extended joke about having sex with a corpse (including a ghost arse going in and out of a sarcophagus) was a bit much.  Quite enjoyed the bad weather evident throughout.

Claude the Racecar Driving Rockstar Super Sleuth

Brightburn (2019)

Or, We Need to Talk About Kal

Dude! What if Superman... was evil?



Yeah, that premise is a total cliché at this point. Fortunately, this (mostly) justifies trotting it out yet again.

Unfortunately, the light that burns twice as bright, burns half as long - and this could have done with burning a little more slowly. While its brief 90 minute runtime was welcome, it doesn't leave much room for psychological depth. His flat affect, vindictive behaviour and fascination with viscera imply that our off-brand Superboy has a personality disorder and we do get a few early scenes of him being a bit of a misfit at school, but his turn from slightly creepy to full on murderer happens faster than a speeding bullet. Even Megamind did a more subtle job of portraying a resentful loser being corrupted by newfound superpowers - to be fair, maybe that's not what the filmmakers were going for, but they simplify things even further by having him be hypnotised by his spaceship, removing any last shred of doubt that this kid is just absolutely evil.

On the plus side, having raced ahead to the factory, the resultant fireworks do indeed burn pretty brightly. There are decent moments of suspense, often followed by some truly grisly violence. The cast put in strong performances, with Jackson A. Dunn doing an effective job as the tween terror. Elizabeth Banks' role (a Southern woman, terrorised by an alien family member) could almost be a repeat of her one from Slither, which is perhaps unsurprising, given this was produced by James Gunn and written by two of his brothers. Apparently there is also a tongue in cheek indication that this takes place in the same world as Gunn's Super, but this is a good few shades darker than either of those earlier films.

It's on UK Netflix for the next couple of weeks. If you've got time to kill (and watch kills) you could do worse, but there's no need to kick yourself if you miss it.

greenman

Quote from: Chedney Honks on October 25, 2021, 12:28:41 PM
An exceptional film, and one I'll start a thread on some day. I absolutely adored the cinematography and period details. Still not seen Yi Yi but it's sitting there waiting. Taipei Story is a bit trickier to get hold of but I'll pick it up at some point.

A similar kind of quality AND it has Shigeru Miyamoto in it.

Artie Fufkin

Me n Mrs Fufkin had an Austin Powers-athon at the weekend.

International Man Of Mystery, 1997 - Yeah. Good fun. Good gags. Nice. I'd totally forgotten Will Ferrell was in it.
The Spy Who Shagged Me, 1999 - Yeah. Ok. A few good gags. I'd totally forgotten Will Ferrell was in it.
Goldmember, 2002 - Poor. V poor indeed. I'd totally forgotten Will Ferrell wasn't in it.

Famous Mortimer


zomgmouse

My Son, My Son, What Have Ye Done. David Lynch produces, Werner Herzog directs, Michael Shannon/Willem Dafoe/Chloë Sevigny/Udo Kier/Brad Dourif star in this spiritual tragedy told in flashbacks of a mentally unwell man who stabs his mother with a sword. Transcendent.

The White Meadows. Iranian drama in which a man travels round collecting people's tears. A boy joins him looking for his father. Sublime.

Small Man Big Horse

Chances Are (1989) - A sort of body swap comedy where lawyer Louie Jeffries (Christopher McDonald) is killed in an accident but reincarnated as Alex Finch (Robert Downey Jr), though initially he doesn't have any memory of his past life. That comes flooding back when after graduating from Yale he meets his former wife Corinne (Cybill Shepherd) but unfortunately not before he gets off with his daughter Miranda (Mary Stuart Masterson) in a very creepy incestuous scene, and that subplot gets worse as Miranda keeps on trying to fuck him throughout the film. Naturally no one believes Finch when he says he's the reincarnation of Louie and just presumes he's mental, and it's not that surprising as Downey Jr comes across as quite creepy and smarmy instead of charming and sweet and the supposed romance between Downey Jr and Shepherd is one of the least convincing in cinema history. For a rom-com it's lacking in laughs, and the ending's really bad too,
Spoiler alert
where an angel takes away Finch's memory which apparently makes it absolutely okay for him to screw his daughter even though he's still the reincarnation of her father
[close]
. Fucking hell. 4.9/10

Dusty Substance

Blade (1998) - Wesley Snipes killing vampires set to a thumping 1990s techno soundtrack in a pre-Matrix action style. No dull origin story which takes up half the film, no pandering to younger audiences, this is kinetic blood-soaked horror fun from back when Hollywood studios took more chances. Loved it, but a shame about the dated visual effects where the blood looks like jelly: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hBOfnJNqB6g


Blade II (2002) - Wesley Snipes killing more vampires set to an early 2000s soundtrack in a post-Matrix action style. More of the same but with stylish direction, Lovecraftian imagery and Ron Perlman, all courtesy of Guillermo Del Toro. Improved visual effects, immersive sound editing, more rounded characters, better cinematography, better jokes - Everything about the sequel is better than the original. In fact, I think this might now be my favourite Del Toro movie.

"Some motherfuckers are always trying to ice-skate uphill".

sevendaughters

Imitation of Life - 1959 version by Douglas Sirk. Taken at surface value this is a well made technicolour weepie about bad racism; go deeper and its a torch to the face of America (maybe even its own audience?) as everyone is just playing a part in the great game of inequality, using and being used. I never got films like this in my teens/20s but they resonate now and feel like a much better examination of race and class and feminism than many more contemporary works? Maybe I would say that as an old fuck, but still - great film!

Claude the Racecar Driving Rockstar Super Sleuth

Quote from: Dusty Substance on October 28, 2021, 11:55:02 AM
Blade (1998) - Wesley Snipes killing vampires set to a thumping 1990s techno soundtrack in a pre-Matrix action style. No dull origin story which takes up half the film, no pandering to younger audiences, this is kinetic blood-soaked horror fun from back when Hollywood studios took more chances. Loved it, but a shame about the dated visual effects where the blood looks like jelly: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hBOfnJNqB6g


Blade II (2002) - Wesley Snipes killing more vampires set to an early 2000s soundtrack in a post-Matrix action style. More of the same but with stylish direction, Lovecraftian imagery and Ron Perlman, all courtesy of Guillermo Del Toro. Improved visual effects, immersive sound editing, more rounded characters, better cinematography, better jokes - Everything about the sequel is better than the original. In fact, I think this might now be my favourite Del Toro movie.

"Some motherfuckers are always trying to ice-skate uphill".
I think I'd rate them roughly equal, as they do slightly different things. Steven Dorff and Donal Logue were more fun than Luke Goss, although I guess Perlman brought some of that same personality to the sequel. Perhaps inevitably, Del Toro amps up the horror, of which the first film only had trace elements. It would seem he was so proud of the Reaper vamps (and rightly so) that he basically recycled them in The Strain.

I'm off to see the first one at the cinema this weekend. 4K restoration, apparently, although I assume they've not touched the dodgy old effects - I'd almost be disappointed if they had. I might add the second to this year's Halloween Movie Mega Marathon.

The third might have been a bit ploppy, but Mahershala Ali's still got some big shoes to fill.

Small Man Big Horse

Quote from: sevendaughters on October 28, 2021, 12:31:01 PM
Imitation of Life - 1959 version by Douglas Sirk. Taken at surface value this is a well made technicolour weepie about bad racism; go deeper and its a torch to the face of America (maybe even its own audience?) as everyone is just playing a part in the great game of inequality, using and being used. I never got films like this in my teens/20s but they resonate now and feel like a much better examination of race and class and feminism than many more contemporary works? Maybe I would say that as an old fuck, but still - great film!

I'm glad you rated it as I plan to watch it soon, I saw the 1934 version back in July and it's certainly of interest, but thanks to the cunts at the Hays Code a lot of the script was cut and they weren't able to examine racism in the manner that they wanted too.

Small Man Big Horse

Nothing Lasts Forever (1984) - A sci-fi comedy with an unusual history, this was never given a cinema, video or dvd release but eventually got an airing in on tv in January 2015 at 2am in the morning. Directed by SNL writer Tom Schiller it's an extremely bizarre film, the kind of thing which was always going to bomb so it's surprising it ever got funding, but while it rarely made me laugh out loud I liked it a fair bit. Centring around rich kid Adam (Zach Galligan, pre-Gremlins fame) who wants to become an artist, he isn't quite sure what he wants to create so we get a tour through some particularly unusual performances both artistically and musically which they film observes in a tongue in cheek manner,
Spoiler alert
before there's a quite jarring plot twist as Adam accidentally gets on a bus that is heading to the moon, all of which is an excuse for some digs at consumerism
[close]
. Largely shot in black and white there's a couple of sequences in colour, while it also includes footage from some classic movies, and has Bill Murray and Lauren Tom in supporting roles while Dan Ackroyd and Mort Sahl have cameos, and though it doesn't always work I was quite charmed by the film, the weird old bastard that it is. 7.2/10

Egyptian Feast

It Lives Again (1978) When John Ryan shows up at the baby shower of Frederic Forrest and Kathleen Lloyd, it's obvious they'll soon be hearing the pit-patter of tiny claws. He advises the disbelieving couple that a murder squad will show up in the delivery room and shoot their baby to bits in the event of Lloyd giving birth to a fanged monstrosity (and possibly even if not - he says they've made a couple of mistakes), but he has a plan and an underground organisation dedicated to saving what they call the evolution of mankind from the authorities, giving them a decent start in life and weaning them off clawing the fuck out of everything in sight whenever anything freaks them out. Needless to say, this is an exceptionally bad idea and it's not long until the cop who looks like Donald Trump from the first one (James Dixon) is called out of retirement to kill one (actually three) last baby.

Not as good as the original, but a cut above many horror sequels as it at least doesn't attempt to replicate the original. I was glad to see Ryan back and very pleased when cop who looks like Donald Trump from the first one was called out of retirement. If James Dixon was born maybe 20 years later, he would've been perfect for a biopic of the next US president. I can't find any pictures that do him justice, you really have to see him in action, but I couldn't look at him without thinking of the cunt, more so this time around. He seems to have been a friend and colleague of Larry Cohen who mainly acted in his films, which makes me think I would've enjoyed a Trump biopic along the lines of The Private Files of J Edgar Hoover or at least a movie where a thinly-fictionalised version gets clawed to death by a mutant baby/plucked from his penthouse balcony by Quetzalcoatl/drinks a pint of The Stuff.

Egyptian Feast

Quote from: Small Man Big Horse on October 28, 2021, 07:49:38 PM
Nothing Lasts Forever (1984)

It was shown on Moviedrome and Cox's introduction confused the fuck out of me when the actual film started and Galligan, Murray etc. showed up. I've been meaning to rewatch it again, as I enjoyed it then but would probably appreciate it more now.