Clerks 3 is here I guess

[BJBMK2]

Ooooh, so it's about the making of the firs...

Oh...

ooohhhh...

[bgmnts]

Depressing.

They used that fucking horrid 90s anthem too.

[shoulders]

Urgh, still, could be worse, it could be Coming to America 2.

[JamesTC]

Hope a donkey gets sucked off in this one.

[Small Man Big Horse]

Fuck me that's an appalling trailer, the only way I'll ever watch this is if I'm tied up and forced to at gunpoint. And even then I might choose death.

[bgmnts]

Fuck me that's an appalling trailer, the only way I'll ever watch this is if I'm tied up and forced to at gunpoint. And even then I might choose death.

Death by Clerks 3.

[sutin]

Pretty cringy, but i'll watch it.

[up_the_hampipe]

I'd rather suck 37 dicks.

[frajer]

Pretty cringy, but i'll watch it.

Just watched the trailer. Pretty much how I feel too.

The problem is I loved Kevin Smith's films as a teen (Clerks through Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back) and I still get happy just seeing what Dante and Randall are up to, even if it's the same old shit being trotted out at an increasingly weary and hackneyed pace. Which of course it is.

I'm exactly the sort of fan that has meant Kevin Smith never had to change his shit up (at least not for long).

Clerks TAS remains the bomb though.

[Mister Six]

The sequel joke gave me a chuckle.

I probably won't watch this (I don't think I've seen any of Smith's films since Clerks II) but I find it hard to muster up any antipathy towards Smith or this film.

[Greg Torso]

This probably won't be very good.

[sutin]

Just watched the trailer. Pretty much how I feel too.

The problem is I loved Kevin Smith's films as a teen (Clerks through Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back) and I still get happy just seeing what Dante and Randall are up to, even if it's the same old shit being trotted out at an increasingly weary and hackneyed pace. Which of course it is.

I'm exactly the sort of fan that has meant Kevin Smith never had to change his shit up (at least not for long).

Clerks TAS remains the bomb though.

Me and my mate who were both teenage Smith fans (not together, i'd only known him a couple of years) went to see Jay & Silent Bob Reboot for nostalgia. We both agreed it was shite, but lovely to see all the old actors again. That's my attitude, i'm a sentimental goon at heart. That's why I still buy every new Belle & Sebastian album on release day.

I hope his daughter isn't in Clerks 3, but we all know she will be.

[Bad Ambassador]

Tried watching Dogma, which I'd previously considered his best film. Had to turn it off after 10 minutes because it was so obnoxious. Incredible that he's been making films for 30 years and hasn't developed as a filmmaker at all.

[sutin]

Red State was the only time I went 'oh wow, he's doing something different and it's really good'. Almost instantly he was back making horrific crap like Yoga Hosers and Reboot.

[Greg Torso]

I think Tusk is the worst film I've ever seen, and I've seen a lot of shit.

[BJBMK2]

Tried watching Dogma, which I'd previously considered his best film. Had to turn it off after 10 minutes because it was so obnoxious. Incredible that he's been making films for 30 years and hasn't developed as a filmmaker at all.

Never before has a film been in more dire need of a script editor. Or an editor.

[checkoutgirl]

Hope a donkey gets sucked off in this one.

Inter-species erotica is a valid art form.

[checkoutgirl]

Pretty cringy, but i'll watch it.

There's no bigger fan of Smith than me around here and even I couldn't be arsed with Yoga Hosers. I got through Jay and Silent Bob Reboot by the skin of my teeth but I really don't know about this one. Maybe I'll torrent it after a bottle and a half of vodka. It's like Smith is daring his fans to abandon him.

He really doesn't credit the viewer with much intelligence. The fourth wall stuff where they look at the camera and give a thumbs up and stuff. Who's that for?

[sutin]

I think Tusk is the worst film I've ever seen, and I've seen a lot of shit.

It wasn't great but i'd say Chasing Amy and Yoga Hosers are worse.

[JamesTC]

Clerks TAS remains the bomb though.

If Clerks III ends with Alec Baldwin turning up as Leonardo Leonardo then all will be forgiven.

[checkoutgirl]

Red State was the only time I went 'oh wow, he's doing something different and it's really good'. Almost instantly he was back making horrific crap like Yoga Hosers and Reboot.

That's the odd thing, Red State was decent, used serious actors like Michael Parks and John Goodman and wasn't his usual stoner comedy fallback position. It looked like he'd turned a corner career wise. Then I think his dad died and he had some sort of epiphany that amounted to "I will make the crappiest film ever and my daughter will be in these films".

The development represented by Red State was out the window and we all know the rest. Just embarrassing really. But if you've seen his live shows you'll know he has a personality and his opinions so he's not going to listen to anyone telling him to stop making shite films.

It's almost as if after his heart attack he thinks he's on borrowed time so he's doing the Bruce Willis thing of getting as many films as possible in the bag before he croaks and to fuck with the quality. Just get the film made, stick the daughter in there somewhere and get the best pay cheque out of it possible. Also there might be a hint of getting work and some money for Randall and Dante. Then do it again.

[SweetPomPom]

I was gonna say it all went tits up for Smith when Scott Mosier decided to stop enabling him and walked but Scott actually stuck around for longer than I thought. Is he still shillong for weed companies?

I will still end up watching this and cringing but Clerks 2 did have that 5 minutes worth of Rosario Dawson. Didn't save it but she was good.

[BJBMK2]

I was gonna say it all went tits up for Smith when Scott Mosier decided to stop enabling him and walked but Scott actually stuck around for longer than I thought. Is he still shillong for weed companies?

I will still end up watching this and cringing but Clerks 2 did have that 5 minutes worth of Rosario Dawson. Didn't save it but she was good.

What's the script with Scott Mosier? Did they fall out?

[JamesTC]

You know I was actually thinking I'd properly enjoy this. I actually had a level of enjoyment of Reboot that was far more than it deserved out of a nostalgia for Kevin Smith's old films.

I now see that Smith is also making a comedy horror anthology film but only releasing it as 5,555 NFTs, so he can fuck right off.

[Noodle Lizard]

This'll be shit, I reckon. The idea of doing a "MOST METAEST EVER!!" take on Clerks so soon after doing the same exact thing with the incredibly boring Jay & Silent Bob: Reboot is just ... shite. I'm hoping it'll be a little more restrained and imaginative than the latter, which really did amount to little more than a highlight reel of things he knew his less discerning fans would high-five just out of recognition.

And I know his films have always somewhat drawn from his own experiences, but they've crossed over into the cinematic equivalent of stream-of-consciousness blogging. The fact that this one incorporates Smith's real-life heart attack implies that it must've been completely rewritten several times over to accommodate whatever's going on in his day-to-day - didn't he finish the script originally in 2016 or so? How much of that has been retained, or how much of it was just malleable because it didn't really matter much in the first place? Just doesn't seem like a good way to write a film - not least one as highly-anticipated as this, with characters people have invested in since the early 90s.

While we're on the subject, I think giving Randall that heart attack storyline just reduces a long-standing character that Jeff Anderson made his own to yet another Smith avatar. Now I think of it, isn't Silent Bob supposed to have had a heart attack before Reboot? Coupled with Smith's extensive talking about his experience in the year or two following, is there really much else that needs to be explored there?

Yes, of course I'll watch it.

[Noodle Lizard]

There's no bigger fan of Smith than me around here and even I couldn't be arsed with Yoga Hosers. I got through Jay and Silent Bob Reboot by the skin of my teeth but I really don't know about this one. Maybe I'll torrent it after a bottle and a half of vodka. It's like Smith is daring his fans to abandon him.

He really doesn't credit the viewer with much intelligence. The fourth wall stuff where they look at the camera and give a thumbs up and stuff. Who's that for?

Have you looked at the comments? A lot of his current fanbase aren't the people who thought he was a promising filmmaker in the 90s, they're the kind of people who spend $100 to go to a Hollywood Babble-On taping and clap at weed. Which is all well and good, by the way, but it's a very different Kevin Smith to the one we (presumably) found interesting.

[sutin]

I'd love to be able to watch the first Clerks again without the baggage of The Cult Of Kevin Smith, it's such a great little film.

[checkoutgirl]

they're the kind of people who spend $100 to go to a Hollywood Babble-On taping

I've been to two of those in the last 8 years or so. In my defence I don't live in America so it's a rarity to see him live and also I wasn't expecting Babble On as it's not my favourite format at all. I would have much preferred just him doing his spoken word bit, but it seems he's all but retired that.

I agree about the majority of his fanbase though, the ones who show up to his live show in a Mooby's uniform and offer to suck his dick if he answers their question. There's way too many of those types who will happily pay for a box of Kevin's poo. Most of them are probably American though.

[Goldentony]

the Jay and Silent Bob reboot is one of the saddest fucking things i've ever seen like in an Atoll K kind of way and there's nothing yet convincing me to even think about the trailer for this, fuck me. Someone sit him down.

[checkoutgirl]

but they've crossed over into the cinematic equivalent of stream-of-consciousness blogging

Funny you say that as I think Tusk was an idea someone either sent in or came up with on one of his podcasts while he was blitzed on weed. Coming down off his cannabis high wasn't enough to make him think it was a bad idea. The film was like some sort of dare that amazingly somehow dragged Johnny Depp into its orbit.