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Park bench plaques

Started by shoulders, July 04, 2022, 02:33:07 PM

Previous topic - Next topic

shoulders

Mavis Sledge

1958-2003

'Don't sit on me you fucking paedophile'

Alberon

Clunge Whippleberry

1932-2015

'Stop wanking and get back to work!
I don't know, in my day the police very rarely masturbated in public places.'

Mr Farenheit

Help, I'm a prisoner in the engraving factory

Replies From View

plaques where you assume it's a typo when you sit down but nope, you do indeed contract the plague

Alberon


shoulders

Graveraper

893-2021

'Rest in peace, sweet prince. Thy tides shall never know thee'

RetroRobot

Alreet lads, it's me, the bench, have a Stella and sit thesen darn

dissolute ocelot

Brush your bench or you'll end up like me.

frajer

Park bench, where the fogies dwell,
where the pigeons live and they do live well.

Elderly Sumo Prophecy


Replies From View

Brush your teeth, or like me you'll end up transformed into a bench and spending the rest of your life being sharted on by pensioners.

Alberon

Don't you dare park your flabby arse cheeks on me!

dissolute ocelot

In Memory of Thomas Spearman, who shat on this bench when it was still dedicated to his wife.

jenna appleseed

She didn't see a smile and never dog.

frajer

For Bill, who hated this park and everyone in it, which is why we sacrificed him and buried his bones beneath the bench 'pon which your arse now rests. All praise the park.

shoulders

Maggie Prestwich

1947-1998

'Malign aunt'

Elderly Sumo Prophecy

This bench



Has been up my arse

Ray Travez

Doris-Rose Duckshaft 1932-2007

Just gave up and died right here, in the middle of this industrial estate

Ray Travez

Billiam Bogstard 1912-2001

Pecked to death by crows

Ray Travez

Iris Catfairy 1940-1979

A rose without a thorn, or indeed any petals

frajer

If you think this bench is dirty, you should meet the missus! She is a second-hand futon.

Replies From View

Quote from: dissolute ocelot on July 04, 2022, 11:44:42 PMIn Memory of Thomas Spearman, who shat on this bench when it was still dedicated to his wife.

Minty fresh though