A Bear's fucking Tail

[alan strang]

That's just the thing! It wouldn't, just because you think your friend has good taste because it's the same as yours. I've read sotcaa, you're both about as funny as a punch in the knackers

What, you haven't heard our Dory Previn Fucks A Badger sketch? It's gold, mate!

But wouldn't you appear on Alan Strangs Comedy Igloo if he asked you to even if it was the same yellow snow joke week in and week out?

If the appropriate Zappa track was used as the sig tune then that would be a feasible notion.

[Clinton Morgan]

Is there going to be a Christmas special?

It'll be rubbish during the summer. 'Peter Firth's Comedy Puddle'.

[Purple Tentacle]

edit: Wrong thread again!

[Emergency Lalla Ward Ten]

Wrong thread again!

Is that what your sitcom's called?

If so, I'm in.

[Almost Yearly]

Yeah, every episode ends in the eponymous catchphrase and a klaxon.


Has Cambrian Times said "But Leigh's a really nice bloke" yet? As if it were relevant. As if Peter Cook wasn't a bit nasty. Our problem surely is precisely that Leigh's a really nice bloke, so he gets humoured and all these twats want to have a laugh with him making shit shit SHIT programmes. I don't know. But I do know the pain of sitting through this Bear cunt just because I didn't see all the Peter Kay Things first time around. And then not all of those are as good as I'd been led to believe neeva. Like I say, no more telly for a bit after Big Brother.

[Clinton Morgan]

I bet strang will appear on chat shows and award ceremonies "in character". The dozy taffy get.

[alan strang]

You just don't understand the statistical density of my genius.

[Clinton Morgan]

Put it to a 1976 disco beat and it'll be more accessible.

[Emergency Lalla Ward Ten]

No, bear with me - Purple Tentacle works in a drapery shop, right, but he's also obsessed with going on Verbwhores. And he solves crimes too, which involves another type of thread. And that's just the pilot!

Needless (or needles!!!) to say, he gets the wrong end of the 'thread' in more ways than one (ie, about four).

NB: These kind of sitcoms don't really exist any more.

[Purple Tentacle]

I want an stammering Brummie assistant to slap and a box of shiny buttons or I'm not signing.

[Paul Dee]

Needless (or needles!!!) to say...[

That's one of those glossary terms isn't it? Why is it 'needles'?

[Purple Tentacle]

because it's a tailor!  Cuh, Richard Whiteley would be spinning in his grave.

[Paul Dee]

NEEDLES TO SAY
(n.) The unnecessary Al Jolson-style hand-fluttering gesture modern comedy actors seem to resort to when trying to convey a) indifference, b) confusion, c) anything at all really. Its primary purpose however is to somehow disguise the writer's sense of 'Sorry, I can't think of anything better, will this do?' by transferring it onto the character

It was always 'needles to say' though, which is why ELW10 got excited about the tailor connection. I'm asking why it is 'needles' in the first place.

So nyer.

[Morrisfan82]

I think it's referring to a pun Alan Partridge made in series 2 of IAP, and the way Coogan delivered it. I think anyway.

Can I be in the sitcom? I'm good at dancing (for the obligatory comedy dancing scene), and I'm sure I could knock up a list of amusing synonyms for 'penis', were it required of me.

The final scene of the series could be an atomic explosion (ie. 'Threads') ...

[Paul Dee]

Oh, the ''...I had the last laugh" thing?


Can I be in it too? I have a novelty antelope which operates on the same principle as those novelty sound-responsive Coca Cola cans from years ago.

[Braintree]

Can I be in this sitcom too? I'm not very talented but that isn't required as the token female is it?

[Jemble Fred]

Just to confirm, Alexei plays the priest who marries Davina McCall and Leigh Francis' Scottish transsexual. He seeemed to be having fun on the set...

Interesting documentary on the ABT DVD, which is mainly LF as himself talking quite naturally about his stuff, and being in awe of Bob Mortimer.