Boomer infestation II: revenge of the wealth-snatchers

[pancreas]

Previous thread.

They've outdone themselves this time. It appears they mistook my Maldon sea salt for sugar. This was discovered when I made a cafetière of coffee and it was salty. So they must have been making their sugary coffee directly in the cafetière; I didn't sufficiently clean it out, meaning we ended up with salty coffee when we made ours. Evidently they were indignant, because they left soon after, having thrown a used teabag into the Maldon by way of a dirty protest.

I should have poisoned them yesterday when I had the chance.

[bgmnts]

It may be one of my superpowers but I think I can identify salt and sugar just with my eyes.

Boomers are funny.

[imitationleather]

Surely pancreas's salt is a massive rock that you have to use a grater to break apart?

How did they mistake that for sugar??

[bgmnts]

Also i'm probably missing context here but is this running a café that is specifically tailored to boomers?

[Buelligan]

No, he's got boomers in his fucking house.  His fault entirely.  Having a house.  They can't resist 'em.  Humane extermination is the kindest way, spraying does nothing.

Put on Countdown, distract them with that.  When you're passing round the bikkies.  Nice and quiet up behind with a lump hammer.  Bishbashbosh.

[JamesTC]

Leave some vegan food around. That ought to get rid of them pretty quickly.

[Buelligan]

I've heard that suggested, yes.

IMHO, you're only making matters worse for yourself, nothing they like more than a good old eye stretch and some tutting.  If anything, they'll probably invite some more round to join in. 

Humane extermination.  Call me when you're ready.

[boki]

Surely pancreas's salt is a massive rock that you have to use a grater to break apart?

Or just fuck it at a boomer's head. Two birds, one stone.

[Dex Sawash]

Should lock up all the gear your own fault really

[pancreas]

Humane extermination.  Call me when you're ready.

Let's get this booked in. PM me your phone number.

[shoulders]

Leaving their droppings all over the tile.

[Sebastian Cobb]

My mum driving an evoque pisses me right off. Personal reg plate too. Became everything she used to hate.

She justifies it as 'just my last bit of fun' (dunno what's fun about an objectively shit 4x4 tbh) but that exemplifies boomers doesn't it 'we've not got much time left now!', yeah neither have the rest of us.

But, like on my last birthday they bought me a lamp I'd expressly asked them not to when they'd previously offered, then my oaf of a father burst the box open to check if it had a bulb (box already said it wasn't included) so I had to use my own time to drop the fucker down the Heart Foundation. In other words they don't listen to me so what can I do?

[bgmnts]

Just stop listening to them?

[Buelligan]

My mum driving an evoque pisses me right off. Personal reg plate too. Became everything she used to hate.

She justifies it as 'just my last bit of fun' (dunno what's fun about an objectively shit 4x4 tbh) but that exemplifies boomers doesn't it 'we've not got much time left now!', yeah neither have the rest of us.

But, like on my last birthday they bought me a lamp I'd expressly asked them not to when they'd previously offered, then my oaf of a father burst the box open to check if it had a bulb (box already said it wasn't included) so I had to use my own time to drop the fucker down the Heart Foundation. In other words they don't listen to me so what can I do?

You have PM.

[Glebe]

Get out of house and get down pub, boomer!

[Sebastian Cobb]

You have PM.

I don't, I'm afraid.

[TrenterPercenter]

Hmmmmm isn't there a bit of problem here in that all of these Boomers are going to die and leave their Boomer fortunes to their kids (and then their kids are the ones that are generally calling out Boomers for Booming)

I wonder how many of these people will stick to their morals and give this even more unearned wealth away?  I'm betting not many, and we'll find a significant amount of them having a highly convenient change of heart.

[bgmnts]

Kids of rich boomers are just going to grow up to be cunts anyway.

[Blue Jam]

Maldon sea salt? Bit common for you innit Pancs? Himalayan or GTFO, no?

[Ferris]

I like boomers, I think they're good!

[Sebastian Cobb]

Hmmmmm isn't there a bit of problem here in that all of these Boomers are going to die and leave their Boomer fortunes to their kids (and then their kids are the ones that are generally calling out Boomers for Booming)

I wonder how many of these people will stick to their morals and give this even more unearned wealth away?  I'm betting not many, and we'll find a significant amount of them having a highly convenient change of heart.

what will happen here is that the tories will flip from policy that makes boomers lives easier to offering inheritance tax breaks to 'generation rent' when their parents/grandparents snuff it. Partially as a shrewd lock-in move but also 'cos you know, inter-generational inheritance is all a lot of them know.

[Buelligan]

Happily, the heat death of the planet will mean this is a complete non-issue.

[Bigfella]

Point of order: if you were born in the mid 70's, are you unequivocally classed as an old boomer bastard?

[Sebastian Cobb]

Point of order: if you were born in the mid 70's, are you unequivocally classed as an old boomer bastard?

genx

[Brundle-Fly]

Hmmmmm isn't there a bit of problem here in that all of these Boomers are going to die and leave their Boomer fortunes to their kids (and then their kids are the ones that are generally calling out Boomers for Booming)

I wonder how many of these people will stick to their morals and give this even more unearned wealth away?  I'm betting not many, and we'll find a significant amount of them having a highly convenient change of heart.

It's the human condition.

[TrenterPercenter]

what will happen here is that the tories will flip from policy that makes boomers lives easier to offering inheritance tax breaks to 'generation rent' when their parents/grandparents snuff it. Partially as a shrewd lock-in move but also 'cos you know, inter-generational inheritance is all a lot of them know.

Exactly.  The idea is isn't it that Boomers had all the privileges which they have then translated into wealth.  They've already been moving this wealth to their kids (they were already doing this when I was in my 20s). 

This essentially leaves us with a load of people that already benefit from Boomers (those that used the bank of mummy and daddy to get on the property ladder) and will be taking in their little empires when the time comes.

I guess I'm saying Boomer might ultimately end up being too narrow.

[Ferris]

Personally, I don't care about the travails of Pancreas and his (self-imposed?) infestation.

The real gems in these threads come from the appreciation of boomer poetry. Here's one to get us started:

Remember the days when
Summer lasted for 4 years
Policemen's helmets were red
And dogs were hexagonal

Instead of front doors we had a flap
Made out of fucking bullshit
Dad worked at the smelter's
And got paid in dildos

Carpets were so thin
You could fit one in your bum
And still have money left over
To oil your Wankel rotary engine.


 KEVIN FUCKWIT, MIDDLESEX - TO GREAT APPLAUSE NO DOUBT

[Sebastian Cobb]

Seeing millenials fall into similar awful Peter Kay reminiscence.

WHO REMEBERS THE MILK MAN AND LANDLINES AND ANSWERING MACHINES AND VIDEOPLUS 😭

[Bigfella]

genx

Cheers, mate!  I have a high opinion of you too, didn't want to reveal it too quickly.

[shoulders]

Hmmmmm isn't there a bit of problem here in that all of these Boomers are going to die and leave their Boomer fortunes to their kids (and then their kids are the ones that are generally calling out Boomers for Booming)

I wonder how many of these people will stick to their morals and give this even more unearned wealth away?  I'm betting not many, and we'll find a significant amount of them having a highly convenient change of heart.

Most people don't expect that, they just ask that this wealth isn't used to deny other people a chance, as happens with BTL landlordism.