Oft-forgotten gems from the Alan Partridge canon

[Des Wigwam]

Does anyone else say "I don't know what that man is playing at. The judges will come down like a tonne of bricks on that" when they see the support car in cycling?

[kalowski]

"I ate cocktail sausages and a scotch egg, or sausage two ways as it's known round here."

[Ferris]

That's the section in north east London which he paraphrases Titchmarsh as the only place in the world where you can "punch a stranger and feel pretty confident they deserved it".

[markburgle]

"DAN" is the nadir

Nah, the guff about "Whoopi Goldberg's copper kettle" is the low point, unfunny tedious waffle. "DAN" may have been memefied by awful people but oi fink it's a skilfully done bit.

[DJ Bob Hoskins]

Does anyone else say "I don't know what that man is playing at. The judges will come down like a tonne of bricks on that" when they see the support car in cycling?

Every single time. Just yesterday a car from a bike-rental company passed me in the street, carrying a load of bikes on its roof and I immediately thought "There's no way..." "Surely the judges..." etc


EDIT: Likewise whenever I see someone cycling without their hands on the handlebars in real life, my inner monologue involuntarily pipes up with "Riding non-handed! There's no need for that".

[kalowski]

That's the section in north east London which he paraphrases Titchmarsh as the only place in the world where you can "punch a stranger and feel pretty confident they deserved it".

Yes, just before he goes to Gatwick and gets drunk with "craggy faced" Nick Knowles.

[iamcoop]

"When you're at the top, and people perceive you to be not at the top anymore, they often try and kick you when you're down (in their perception)"

[Ferris]

Yes, just before he goes to Gatwick and gets drunk with "craggy faced" Nick Knowles.

"PLANT ONE ON HIM, KNOWLESY! LAY HIM OUT!"

[Martin Van Buren Stan]

"PLANT ONE ON HIM, KNOWLESY! LAY HIM OUT!"

That whole chapter is amazing and full of great jokes but would Alan really confess such a story? That's my big problem with nomad. I love it but it takes a lot of energy to suspend your disbelief throughout

[kalowski]

That whole chapter is amazing and full of great jokes but would Alan really confess such a story? That's my big problem with nomad. I love it but it takes a lot of energy to suspend your disbelief throughout

Whilst I know what you mean, it's usually just the right side of believable¹, especially when you read between the lines. "And I'm 100% OK with that."



-------------------
1. Most of the time.

[Ferris]

That whole chapter is amazing and full of great jokes but would Alan really confess such a story? That's my big problem with nomad. I love it but it takes a lot of energy to suspend your disbelief throughout

It's one of the things the Gibbonses do well - create a semi-plausible reason for these things to be included.

For the tramp, it's been included so Alan can invent some choice lines and also get one over on him by explaining all of the generous things he would have done (cash, made him an exec producer) but now won't. He's been wronged, but by adding a fictional gotcha, Alan feels like (needless to say) he's had the last laugh.

Similarly for Knowles - it's included to paint Alan in a sympathetic light, and also demonstrate the fickleness and disloyalty of other celebrities with whom he (now) has a grudge.

Another example - the fruit seller bit in scissored isle. That guy makes a mug of Alan, but he keeps the footage in and uses it to score points ("it was the easiest thing I'd ever done", then insinuates he's a violent man who might use drugs).

The potential loss of status from the anecdote is worth it (in fiction) because he gets some very petty revenge at the end.

[Mobius]

The Edmonds chapter of Nomad is so satisfying after years of Edmonds references. I love the audiobooks so much

[billiabus cricketeer]

Off to see Stratagem this weekend and have been getting in the mood by absorbing as much Partridge content as possible. This exchange from "On open books" had me howling earlier this evening;

Chris: Moving on to you, what's your regime, eating-wise?

Alan: I keep boiled eggs, in a bowl, in a drawer.

Chris: Do you?

Alan: Yeah. For snacking. It's important to keep one's eye on fibre content. Early on in the writing of the book I got that badly wrong. I spent four days without going.

Chris: That's a long time.

Alan: The cleaner said I turned yellow.

Chris: Sheesh.

Alan: In the end, I was so desperate I just knocked back two pints of Milk Of Magnesia.

Chris: And did that work?

Alan: Oh, yeah. Christ, yeah. Be careful what you wish for. I mean, I passed out. Just thank God I was in a forest, by a river. Er, I burnt my clothes, waited until it was dark, and then just ran home.

[The Bumlord]

I love all those little bits which show how unhinged Alan is when nobody's watching.

[robhug]

"ohh you've got a welly on"

got a stich driving home, even though Ive heard it at least 10 times

[buttgammon]

Spoiler alert

The beautiful butterfly Ian Dixon

[close]

Is one from Stratagem that I expect will stick.

[kalowski]

Just started a re listen to the podcast. Jesus it's good. The little section about feeding Seldom salami by placing the meat on a Ryvita and pushing it under the door is brilliant. "Usually good for four goes until Seldon's saliva renders the Ryvita matrix unusable."

[luckyjim]

This is a question that surely must have been covered before but if so I haven't seen it:

The very final seconds of MMM Series 2 are freeze frames (presumably because the North Norfolk Digital stream is down) after Alan and Simon say "Aha" together. But if you look closely, Alan has "stigmata" on the palms of his hands and is frozen in a traditional Christ-like pose. Is this a joke I'm not getting, or has it been covered by the writers somewhere?

[kalowski]

"There's no need, because Mohammed has moved the mountain to you! It's not literally a mountain, it's a photocopier. Although coincidentally it was driven here in a white Bedford Astramax by a man called Mohammed."

[Twonty Gostelow]

This is a question that surely must have been covered before but if so I haven't seen it:

The very final seconds of MMM Series 2 are freeze frames (presumably because the North Norfolk Digital stream is down) after Alan and Simon say "Aha" together. But if you look closely, Alan has "stigmata" on the palms of his hands and is frozen in a traditional Christ-like pose. Is this a joke I'm not getting, or has it been covered by the writers somewhere?

It was discussed here for a bit just after it went out https://www.cookdandbombd.co.uk/forums/index.php?topic=49588.msg2759499#msg2759499

[Ferris]

This is a question that surely must have been covered before but if so I haven't seen it:

The very final seconds of MMM Series 2 are freeze frames (presumably because the North Norfolk Digital stream is down) after Alan and Simon say "Aha" together. But if you look closely, Alan has "stigmata" on the palms of his hands and is frozen in a traditional Christ-like pose. Is this a joke I'm not getting, or has it been covered by the writers somewhere?

Never been adequately explained that I recall, think it was just a throwaway bit of weirdness to reinforce that Simon is a disciple of Alan. Doesn't massively make sense.

Religious iconography is not my strong suit though.

[Cold Meat Platter]

The Edmonds chapter of Nomad is so satisfying after years of Edmonds references. I love the audiobooks so much

Even just the word Edmonds makes me laugh when Partridge says it.
"But Edmonds just sat there, looking at me, with his stupid Ewok head" is a belter of a sentence.

[Ferris]

Yeah the Mike Reid/wally segment of that is just brilliant. Love the characterization of him as a school bully yawning and mucking about when Alan is trying to pay attention to the tedious workplace safety training session.

[chip]

*rummaging through pockets* Matalan?...

[kalowski]

"Nothing refreshes you like a ice cold glass of milk."
That whole section from the podcast is beautiful. Coogan's voice acting is so good as he adds a smile, a laugh, a bigger laugh...

[markburgle]

Enjoyed Oasthouse much more on recent relisten. The fact one of his voiceover credits  was "So You Say You've Been Sexually Harassed"

[Des Wigwam]

Wasn't there a pre-release episode (or two) of From the Oasthouse that was quite Covid/lock down heavy but didn't appear in the main release? I always remember the line "if you're not a key worker these days you're no-one" but don't remember it in the final episode.

Anyway - the traffic jingle randomly drifts through my head - *beep* *beep* *c'mon!* *you can get a f'n bus through there! * *beeeeep*

[Utter Shit]

Wasn't there a pre-release episode (or two) of From the Oasthouse that was quite Covid/lock down heavy but didn't appear in the main release? I always remember the line "if you're not a key worker these days you're no-one" but don't remember it in the final episode.

IIRC they released episode 2 of the Oasthouse collection (the rambling one) a few days before the release. I can't remember off the top of my head but I guess that would have had a lockdown theme with solo rambling being one activity you could still do? I don't remember any pre-release episodes that weren't in the main release - if there was, I missed it and would love to hear it!

[Utter Shit]

Enjoyed Oasthouse much more on recent relisten. The fact one of his voiceover credits  was "So You Say You've Been Sexually Harassed"

I think Oasthouse might be my favourite Partridge, certainly it's the one I feel the strongest urge to relisten to. Endless quotable lines.

[buttgammon]

IIRC they released episode 2 of the Oasthouse collection (the rambling one) a few days before the release. I can't remember off the top of my head but I guess that would have had a lockdown theme with solo rambling being one activity you could still do? I don't remember any pre-release episodes that weren't in the main release - if there was, I missed it and would love to hear it!

This is how I remember it too. I also remember having to pause because I was laughing too hard and that's when I knew this was going to be up there with the best Partridge (which is Oasthouse, the two books and MMM in my opinion).