Cricket 2022: The Thuglife Era (Stokes, Woakes, Foakes, and plenty of chokes)

[badaids]

We lost 5 for 23 this morning but never mind Root played that scoop shot.

[sevendaughters]

is 334/2 to 539 all out a collapse? probably not but still.

[Thursday]

Oh my that's a Saville tier leave.

[shoulders]

As for Moeen 'unretiring', fuck off, the arrogance of that from a player who was deteriorating every year and is 34 and doesn't deserve to be in the side.

But the killer for me is him admitting he used to find it boring and switch off during games.

Wouldn't have him anywhere near the side but you know that McCullum wants him and Buttler back. When are we going to be rid of these fucking cunts

[Inspector Norse]

Great POSITIVE morning from England! Just think, in the olden days they might have been conservative and ground out a 150-run lead before putting NZ in to bat this evening, with time to bowl them out and knock off a minimal target tomorrow but no! Brendy's great entertainers went hard at it and now it's NZ who are 40 ahead at lunch with the opportunity to set England 250-300 on a day five pitch. Brilliant thinking from England's NEW ERA!

[shoulders]

Yes he can, yes he did: Ollie Pope vindicates England's show of faith
https://www.espncricinfo.com/story/england-vs-new-zealand-2nd-test-yes-he-can-yes-he-did-ollie-pope-vindicates-england-show-of-faith-1319633

What is it about the cricinfo writers and torturous gimmicks. HOPE. Kill me now.

[Inspector Norse]

One of the remarkable things about England is that they have scored 500+ and are still going to come out of this test with their PAEDAIDS credentials enhanced.

[shoulders]

Well, I was coming in to say it's been an entertaining series, we've stood up at times, crumbled at times, so have NZ. Both teams giving it as good as they've got. We're doing well to stay in this one.

[Thursday]

New Zealand really "going native" and immersing themselves in the local culture.

[shoulders]

Here we go, the immovable forces. This is the match, this partnership here, I think.

[gilbertharding]

Great POSITIVE morning from England! Just think, in the olden days they might have been conservative and ground out a 150-run lead before putting NZ in to bat this evening, with time to bowl them out and knock off a minimal target tomorrow but no! Brendy's great entertainers went hard at it and now it's NZ who are 40 ahead at lunch with the opportunity to set England 250-300 on a day five pitch. Brilliant thinking from England's NEW ERA!

Huge misreading of the room to think that England fans want POSTIVE cricket at all. It's not foopball, with the lie all foopball fans tell themselves about 'playing in certain ways, creative, exciting...'. And we're not Australians.

You know - there is comfort and pleasure to be taken from England (& Wales - don't forget!) just being a bit crap. Or even completely rubbish.

Of course it's nice to beat a team thoroughly, especially if they're arseholes, but we all know that's only ever a blip.

Cricket's about the friends you make on the journey.

[shoulders]

Obsession some people have with Archer, Stone and Wood when they have been responsible for maybe 2 test wins for England between them is really rather odd.

Archer is a matter of grief, true, Wood is intermittently successful but really showed no signs of being anywhere near as effective than Anderson or Broad, or that the publicised 'point of difference' translated to test wins. He'd be handy to have given the injury crisis but never felt indispensable. Stone was almost totally untried I can't really miss someone we don't actually know was good or not.

[shoulders]

Free tickets for Day 5 btw.

If anyone is in the area.

[Thursday]

LMAO

The funniest part is New Zealand already have enough runs.

[Mr Eggs]

Coney has England ahead. The lying cunt.

[shoulders]

LMAO

The funniest part is New Zealand already have enough runs.

Not sure anyone could say that after the last test.

Similar situation where it looks tricky to get in but runs available when there's a partnership going. This time NZ will be down to 3 seamers and Bracewell so a bit more limited.

[Thursday]

Coney has England ahead. The lying cunt.

Yeah it's pretty clearly New Zealand by 238 runs.

I could do a much better job than these pundits.

[shoulders]

Laughed out loud at Tom Banton's first class record. Genuinely makes Crawley look good. Potts has scored more runs than him in a first class game.

[shoulders]

Is there anyone in English cricket who's nickname isn't part of their surname with a y added?

Just reading Aliy talking about wanting to play for Stokesey and not wanting to disrespect Parky and Leachy.

[Pranet]

Jack Leach is also called Nut I believe.

[shoulders]

Maybe by Somerset, dunno if I have heard anyone in the England setup use that.

It would be funnier if his nickname was his actual first name.

[king_tubby]

Is there anyone in English cricket who's nickname isn't part of their surname with a y added?

Just reading Aliy talking about wanting to play for Stokesey and not wanting to disrespect Parky and Leachy.

TMS had Gladstone Small on at lunch, and he was referred to as Gladdy, which is his first name with a y added. So your theory is fucking bollocks, mate.

[shoulders]

Ah, this only seemed to surface Strauss era onwards. Much more interesting 80s and 90s nicknames.

[king_tubby]

BEEFY

[badaids]

Ah, this only seemed to surface Strauss era onwards. Much more interesting 80s and 90s nicknames.

Robin Smith - The Judge
Michael Atherton - Dread
Gower - Lubo
Ian Bell - The Sherminator
Boycott - Fiery
Michael Vaughan - Cunt
Trescothick - Banger
P*** T****** - The Cat

Huge drop off in quality of nicknames these days.

I've only just realised why Root has the number 66 on his shirt.  What a peen.

[shoulders]

That was just Warne's name for him. Bell was called Belly, I'm afraid.

[Inspector Norse]

We lost 5 for 23 this morning but never mind Root played that scoop shot.

https://www.theguardian.com/sport/2022/jun/13/joe-roots-day-four-cameo-shows-master-craftsman-at-pinnacle-second-test-new-zealand-cricket

He added just 13 runs to his overnight total in the second Test against New Zealand, but still displayed all his class

GET IN AIDS

[poo]

Morning

[iamcoop]

Robin Smith - The Judge
Michael Atherton - Dread
Gower - Lubo
Ian Bell - The Sherminator
Boycott - Fiery
Michael Vaughan - Cunt
Trescothick - Banger
P*** T****** - The Cat

Huge drop off in quality of nicknames these days.

I've only just realised why Root has the number 66 on his shirt.  What a peen.

According to Wikipedia one of Ian Bell's nicknames is "The Sledgehammer of Eternal Justice"

[iamcoop]

AIM IT AT THE STUMPS YOU RIDDLED CRETINS