How many people do you find interesting?

[neuteredcats]

I am quite proud of the fact that, for the first time on my life, I am Billy No Mates.

I've had friends all of my life until now - my early 30's. And, to be honest, I ditched my last 'friend' last year - due to an act perpetrated by them of sheer mind-boggling selfishness.

I am quite enjoying my friend free existence.

I drink much less, no longer have crushing hangovers, have given up smoking, no longer have dilemmas or fears about socialising - agonising about whether I am really in the mood to go out or not and if I do am I going to have a shit time and if I don't am I letting people down.

The time I used to waste on friends - generally revolving around sad old nightspots and paying to drench my body with alcohol and choke my lungs with smoke - is now spent pursuing much worthier interests.

I enjoy books more, films, art, nature, walks, facts and current affairs and flower pressing/salamander spotting (not really!!)

If I've learned one thing in life its this - 'Most of the people will let you down most of the time' - its a fact. Don't blame them, blame the selfish gene.

Now that I am happy with myself I no longer require the company/ presence of others to make me feel better or to justify my/their existence. And, as the original point of this thread said, it is true that most people are uninteresting and quite boring.... I've tried to raise the topic of string theory with people I've met and straight away you see their eyes glaze over - they probably think it has something to do with tampon manufacturers.

And this whole thing about being 'popular' - what is that? Who gives a fuck!!

What I generally find is that there is a strong relationship between ignorance and selfishness in most people.

[Nearly Annually]

this is probably knocking around your local library, has anyone who's read it not found it beneficial?

Never heard of it.

*Add to basket*

Well that was a mistake. Never listen to the recommendations of eejits on the internet. I found two and a half interesting titbits in the whole book. He came across as an arrogant misogynist (Italian?) who just wanted to sell more of his other 57 books at me on the strength of having invented the phrase "lateral thinking" (plus some other stupid phrases that unsurprisingly haven't caught on). At the end he says, "Some boring critic will probably say that this is a boring book about being interesting..." Well bloody right it is. Sorry rou-rou, but neither you nor I nor most Verbwhores have any need for this book. I don't blame you for my wasted £8.99, I blame myself. It'll be a quick joke when I give it to my boring friend, but I won't suggest he reads it.

I would love to play "what is interesting about a frog?" with you, but I can't be arsed.

Quite.

[Ambient Sheep]

Interesting case, is Dave - women have always been like flies* on shit with him. Men too. The party doesn't feel right until he's there, but on closer inspection he actually contributes very little, even one-to-one in the corner. But all you ever hear is "Where's Dave?"

I suspect that what he probably contributes is pheremones.

[Make me smile]

butnut, you are me and I claim my £5



that wasn't much of a first post was it....

[butnut]

butnut, you are me and I claim my £5



that wasn't much of a first post was it....

Great - could you do the washing-up and clean the kitchen, as I can't be arsed.

[mr rou-rou]

this is probably knocking around your local library, has anyone who's read it not found it beneficial?

Never heard of it.

*Add to basket*

I .... blame you for my wasted £8.99

I said Library

There's no use speaking to you when you have the black hat on

;)~ soz

[Ambient Sheep]

There's no use speaking to you when you have the black hat on.

Now *that's* not a bad book, although a touch idealistic (I could just see any company I've ever worked for doing that without major repercussions for those involved, yeah right).

[Smackhead Kangaroo]

Bah imagine the stigma of being seen with a book of that sort of title Ugh. I'd have to kill myself

What thing about being popular?

I find that I'm the most interesting person anyway and everyone else is just a barren rock orbiting me. So I don't care.

I have found it immensely easy to alienate myself from friends. acquaintance friends mean little to me, and good friends seem to have aknack for pissing me off. So off I go I'm starting a newlife in the witness protection program

[neuteredcats]

What thing about being popular?

Surely you must know of, or have seen, these people who 'allegedly'' exude 'popularity'?

You know, like the bloke who walks into a room and several snivelling, venereal-disease ridden slags splay their legs at him??? Screaming, giggling and cackling like a turkey farmers dream??

Or, for instance, people that fawn over a fast-talking, loudmouthed cunt because they think 'he's so funny' and has 'got the gift of the gab'??? When, to others eyes, he's a snivveling little gobshite.  

Perhaps people like this don't exist where you are (I envy you if so). Round here, there's a whole town full of 'em....

[Rats]

Well, the fact that I can't be bothered to read this thread speaks volumes. I read almosts posts but he's not saying much. I don't know what you're getting at here, I haven't read it, I imagine it's not that you think you're more interesting than everyone else gazzy or everyone wouldn't be agreeing with you (I caught that bit about you being suprised people empathised). Maybe you're just lazy.

[Smackhead Kangaroo]

Surely you must know of, or have seen, these people who 'allegedly'' exude 'popularity'?

You know, like the bloke who walks into a room and several snivelling, venereal-disease ridden slags splay their legs at him??? Screaming, giggling and cackling like a turkey farmers dream??

Or, for instance, people that fawn over a fast-talking, loudmouthed cunt because they think 'he's so funny' and has 'got the gift of the gab'??? When, to others eyes, he's a snivveling little gobshite.  

Perhaps people like this don't exist where you are (I envy you if so). Round here, there's a whole town full of 'em....

What either you're just jealous, or you're complaining about girls who have no taste whatsoever.
Alternatively- related to some shite programme on Sky called ummm- something to do with How to pull or something, You could be complaining about people who insist they're dead charming and attractive when all they have is a cheap replacement which is dogged persistence.
The difference being that women show interested before you do.
Did anyone else see it? I only saw a bit of it and it was shite. He couldn't spell either. When do girls splay their legs for some cunt? Ugly slags maybe

[Nearly Annually]

I read almosts posts

Aw, how sweet.

but he's not saying much.

Mm, how true.

[neuteredcats]

What either you're just jealous, or you're complaining about girls who have no taste whatsoever.
Alternatively- related to some shite programme on Sky called ummm- something to do with How to pull or something, You could be complaining about people who insist they're dead charming and attractive when all they have is a cheap replacement which is dogged persistence.
The difference being that women show interested before you do.
Did anyone else see it? I only saw a bit of it and it was shite. He couldn't spell either. When do girls splay their legs for some cunt? Ugly slags maybe

Umm, no actually, jealousy doesn't feature on my radar of appropriate everyday responses - call it my upbringing or whatever, can't remember having experienced a jealous thought in my life, (perhaps when I was very young). When your totally 100% at ease with yourself - mind tricks like jealousy that other people become bitter with in their lives just don't even come into it.

No, I'm not talking about just girls who have no taste either - there are plenty of blokes out there who act the same. For example, fawn and go all unnecessary over the member of the opposite sex they covet - without knowing anything - or indeed, very little about - the object of their worship. You know, the puke-inducing way that everything said person says is apparently 'witty' and 'clever' when if a lot of other people said it they'd pull a blank expression. I've seen it with my own eyes and had plenty of discussions about it with others who are in agreement with me.

The 'splaying of legs' was an attempt to inject a bit of cynical sarcasm into it - shame if that was lost on you. Suffice to say, where I come from, loose morals are a prerequisite for socialising.

I'm sorry - as well - if perhaps I have touched a raw nerve. Or is it just that you are having difficulty understanding me and I have to spell it out for you.

Oh, and its all really not that important....

[neuteredcats]

Oh and I don't watch Sky either.....

[Stripeyjoe]

I do find that mostly I am at my most interesting after a few shandies, and after several I get so interesting that I physically vomit.
I do try to find others interesting however it is not easy when your head is full of stuff and nonsense.

[phes]

You know, the puke-inducing way that everything said person says is apparently 'witty' and 'clever' when if a lot of other people said it they'd pull a blank expression.

What's that?

I've seen it with my own eyes and had plenty of discussions about it with others who are in agreement with me.

Oh, god yeah. Your sooo right.

[butnut]

Umm, no actually, jealousy doesn't feature on my radar of appropriate everyday responses - call it my upbringing or whatever, can't remember having experienced a jealous thought in my life, (perhaps when I was very young). When your totally 100% at ease with yourself - mind tricks like jealousy that other people become bitter with in their lives just don't even come into it.

You're lying, aren't you? You have jealous thoughts every single day. Even tiny ones. Often you won't realise it. Rich young wankers (of who there are loads near me) make me really angry, but it's probably because, in some way, I'm jealous of their apparent material success, even though I'm doing the work that I've always wanted to, and the hours that I choose and I know that really they lead meaningless and pointless lives with surround sound. But it's the fucking smug rich couples who only drink a sip of expensive wine and then leave who get me really angry.

I refuse to accept there's a human being who's ever lived that's never had a jealous thought.

(Sorry - been on the English Stella tonight)

[neuteredcats]

Umm, no actually, jealousy doesn't feature on my radar of appropriate everyday responses - call it my upbringing or whatever, can't remember having experienced a jealous thought in my life, (perhaps when I was very young). When your totally 100% at ease with yourself - mind tricks like jealousy that other people become bitter with in their lives just don't even come into it.

You're lying, aren't you? You have jealous thoughts every single day. Even tiny ones. Often you won't realise it. Rich young wankers (of who there are loads near me) make me really angry, but it's probably because, in some way, I'm jealous of their apparent material success, even though I'm doing the work that I've always wanted to, and the hours that I choose and I know that really they lead meaningless and pointless lives with surround sound. But it's the fucking smug rich couples who only drink a sip of expensive wine and then leave who get me really angry.

I refuse to accept there's a human being who's ever lived that's never had a jealous thought.

(Sorry - been on the English Stella tonight)

No, don't apologise.

Ermm, actually not a jealous thought within the last 5-10 years, no. (If you notice, I said when I was very young but I've modified that now coz I've given it some thought). I got to the point, 5-10 yrs ago, where I realised that jealous feelings and thoughts were doing my mental health no good whatsoever so I got over myself, (and other people). It's really not worth it, life's too short. Covetousness is a  BAD thing.

I don't hanker after anything much anymore - I am - more or less, happy with my lot. I'm probably a bit sad really - but a lot happier to boot.

Jealousy is encouraged surreptitiously by our culture anyway - better house, better car, better holiday, better wife, better life - through advertising and such. 'You'll be that much happier if you get this or that.'

Really not worth all the bother, IMO....

A nice walk in the country on a summers day costs nothing, (apart from the drive of course), and is one of the best experiences going....[/b]

[phes]

Surely anyone that doesn't get jealous is a freak. I'ts not just about cars, houses, wifes etc etc..... that is all bulshit.
Are football players not jealous of Roberto Carlos incredible natural ability and physique that allows him the edge over so many worthy counterparts. Who spurs them on to be better, he does.
I love mixing and have a few friends I like to get together with now and then to spin some tunes. It enrages me, and I am very jealous that some of them have a natural rhythm and ability to monitor two seperate sound sources much more easily than I am able to. I may practise harder, and longer, but it will still take more to reach the level that they are playing at. By which time they will, with very little practise, have sauntered on to again play above and beyond me.
That makes me really fucking jealous. That's not to say I let it infringe on our relationships, that would just be childish.
I dont understand, and maybe I'm the freak. How can anyone possibly live without jealous thoughts. It's natural.

[butnut]

the last 5-10 years, no. (If you notice, I said when I was very young but I've modified that now coz I've given it some thought). I got to the point, 5-10 yrs ago, where I realised that jealous feelings and thoughts were doing my mental health no good whatsoever so I got over myself, (and other people). It's really not worth it, life's too short. Covetousness is a  BAD thing.

I don't hanker after anything much anymore - I am - more or less, happy with my lot. I'm probably a bit sad really - but a lot happier to boot.

Jealousy is encouraged surreptitiously by our culture anyway - better house, better car, better holiday, better wife, better life - through advertising and such. 'You'll be that much happier if you get this or that.'

Really not worth all the bother, IMO....

A nice walk in the country on a summers day costs nothing, (apart from the drive of course), and is one of the best experiences going....[/b]

I agree with you that our society is based, largely, on making you jealous of other people's apparent success, and making you buy more to try and emulate them. Hence the whole celebrity-whore-house that goes on every day.

Now, I do my best to try and avoid all this. I hardly ever buy new clothes, as I'm not too bothered what I look like (except on special occasions). I know how pointless all this material shit is. And 99% of the time, I laugh at all these trendy bastards, desperate to be with the next BIG thing.

I think my 'real' friends would be amazed that I'm saying that I ever get jealous of these things. But, very occasionally, I do. But it's not too surprising, given all the adverts that we get bombarded with every day. So, I'm sure you're either lying to us, or to yourself about this, Even Christ or Buddha would be tempted in our commercially fetishistic world.

But, good luck to you. It seems you have some 'inner peace', and you are right, it's really not worth worrying about in the long run.

[phes]

It's natural.

Shit, I'ts not is it?

Oh how I wish I could think things through before I blurt them out, just like all my friends can,

[FrizzBit]

I really don't understand this. I find loads of people interesting, even my oldest friends and I -there are six of them whom I've known for ten years - can still muster up a screaming debate on something. You have to ask people questions about what they think and why. Don't you find that bouncing your own opinions off other people and using them as a sounding board helps you to clarify what you, yourself actually think? I'll admit that we seldom change each other's minds, but the conversations are ENDLESSLY interesting. The only people I find boring are generally men and generally I'm bored because they will not LISTEN or accept that someone else's opinion has any validity. They love to 'teach' and lecture you on stuff, but it never occurs to them that you might be able to teach them something in return. They'll happily witter on about whatever their passion is for hours, and that's great, I love that, but you mention something you're interested in and their eyes glaze over or they immediately dismiss your opinion as worthless - without waiting to find out what it is, or they just go - I'm not familiar with that and end the discussion because they can't hold forth like professor fucking Frink and monoploise the conversation for twelveteen hours! People who are 'familiar' and agree with you every opinion are the LEAST interesting to me. How is someone like that going to show you new ways of looking at the world? I do agree that it has a lot to do with English reserve - if you can't be honest with someone about what you think and feel then the conversation is bound to end up stuck on the weather and Heat magazine :-/ Try asking some questions - even about stuff you like talking about!
I reckon if you'd get over yourself and give people a chance you'd be pleasantly surprised how interesting they'd be. And this stuff about girls! Jesus! Like we're some alien species with the brain capacity of household pets! You know what the problem with most straight blokes is? You like 'Women' too much and are always disappointed when you end up with a PERSON and not a lads mag whore. The saving grace for the others is that despite liking women, you like characters even more.

[Gazeuse]

You know what the problem with most straight blokes is? You like 'Women' too much and are always disappointed when you end up with a PERSON and not a lads mag whore.

Most???

[hencole]

Lots of sexist comments

The only people I know who go on about FHM babes are the ones with midget girlfriends. They're trying to live a fantasy. Let them.
As for not being interested in what you have to say, is this all blokes or just the ones you talk too?

[FrizzBit]

I was trying to be fair and not generalise. I'm new - I didn't want to get jumped on and verbally kicked to death. :-D

The blokes I talk to have known me a long time - they know I'm MILES cleverer and more interesting than they are.....;-)

[Gazeuse]

This takes me back to the Bogey Bar at Leeds University Union in 1981.

[23 Daves]

Mmm... well, I'd say what Frizzbit has contibuted to this debate has at least been interesting, if a complete generalisation, which I'm now going to add to.  The sad thing is, I think 75% of the population are only really interested in their own waffle or their own narrow set of interests and struggle (in particular) to converse sensibly with the opposite sex - and I stick women in that category as well.  I can think of countless examples of male friends of mine who seem unable to shut up for five minutes and engage in the wider conversation that's clearly there to be had, and likewise countless female friends who would rather steer the subject away from anything passionate or geared around the fine details (because it's too 'geeky' or 'intense' or whatever).   It's called stupidity in my opinion.  It's not gender specific, but it does sometimes show itself in different ways.  There - I've said it.

The older I get, the more I just walk away from people who bore me.  Life's too short.  On the whole, it's difficult to really disinterest me, though. I've said before that I'll happily listen to a trainspotter ramble on about his (or very remotely possibly her) interest if they include a lot of colour, a lot of tales of the places they've been to, and a healthy slice of self-deprecation if it's required in places. If there's room for me to chip in, ask questions or learn I'm happy.  I'm generally interested in what makes people tick, and I love story-tellers.  Basically, plenty of people are entertaining and engaging enough to get through.

I can't be doing with people who are desperate to impress, though.  People who try to make A HUGE IMPRESSION from minute one, start stories with "You're gonna think I'm mad, but...", don't stop for breath, or brag about their minor achievements just get the cold shoulder.  I'm fantastic fun around people who are all on cocaine, obviously... and I can't help but find people who are clearly trying too hard boring as well.

[hencole]

I was trying to be fair and not generalise. I'm new - I didn't want to get jumped on and verbally kicked to death. :-D

The blokes I talk to have known me a long time - they know I'm MILES cleverer and more interesting than they are.....;-)

Sorry I didn't read your entire message, my eyes glazed over half way through ; )


I know what you mean about blokes not being good at listening to the other side of arguments and conversations. Used to annoy my ex no end, until I gaffered taped her mouth shut. Never heard a peep from her since.

[FrizzBit]

But why is it such a struggle to converse 'sensibly' with the opposite sex? I have quite a few male friends, not as many as I have female friends obviously, but we don't sit in the pub chatting in gender specific groups (unless there's been a football match on *yawn*, I'm sorry, I know I'm missing something, so many people can't be so passionate for no reason, but I just don't get it). We chat about films, music, books, life, politics - FUCK, sometimes the lads and ladies even AGREE! *Shock horror* What I object to is having my arse groped or having to listen to some pissed up wanker telling me how much money he earns or what his car cost, like I care. And I'm not a bitch - if a guy comes over and tries to start a conversation, a proper one, like he actually wants to get to know me - I'll play ball and if I'm not interested I'll let him know that nicely. If he buys me a drink I'll buy him one back (mostly because I don't want him thinking I'm going to shag him for the price of a rum and coke). We're not EVIL you know? Honestly - I do despair sometimes.

And people who take coke are boring wankers.

[Gazeuse]

Mmm... well, I'd say what Frizzbit has contibuted to this debate has at least been interesting, if a complete generalisation.

Yes, the first paragraph was all well and good, but the second was very strange, considering it wasn't meant to be a generalisation. I'm a bit puzzled by it, that's all.

Anyway, hello FrizzBit...Bienvenue, wilkommen.