What is Britney on about?

[Tom Rad]

I saw this in the Guardian a couple of days ago, in a review of a Britney Spears concert at the Wembley Arena. Apparently, on the tour program Britney describes the show's  "concept" as follows:

Thoughts of happiness that lies within everyone tranquillises your being of being who you be of this forbidden picture of what you are supposed to show.

Any guesses as to what she is on about? Or even what she is on?

[Crazy Penis]

She is saying

Since I've had my boob job I find myself having to inject more and more heroin before each gig as the silicon invariably soaks up much of the toxins and music loving necrophiliacs everywhere wish I was dead.

Can't remember where I got that quote from but she was told to clean it up for the kids.

[falafel]

I saw this in the Guardian a couple of days ago, in a review of a Britney Spears concert at the Wembley Arena. Apparently, on the tour program Britney describes the show's  "concept" as follows:

Thoughts of happiness that lies within everyone tranquillises your being of being who you be of this forbidden picture of what you are supposed to show.

Any guesses as to what she is on about? Or even what she is on?

Whatever she's trying to say, she's got appalling grammar.

Perhaps it's:

Thoughts of happiness that lie within everyone tranquilise... umm...your being of who you be of this forbidden picture of what you are supposed to show?

Ahh! I know! in the middle of writing it, someone burst into the dressing room and she spontaneously, temporarily, turned into a pirate. So it's:

Thoughts of happiness that lie within everyone tranquilise your being of... arrr... who you be? ...sorry, got a bit lost there... of this forbidden picture of what you are supposed to show.

Alternatively, her ghostwriter's on crack.

[Utter Shit]

There's definitely a Darwinist subtext there.

[falafel]

There's definitely a Darwinist subtext there.

That girl's got a Darwinist subtext, ferchrissakes...

[hands cold, liver warm]

Thoughts of happiness that lies within everyone tranquillises your being of being who you be of this forbidden picture of what you are supposed to show.

look at me, look at me. Not only am I a famous artist but I also ponder on the great philosphical questions. It is my duty as a role model to teach the poor screaming plebs about happiness and love. (note to self: You are sooooo right Britney, you are soooo wise Britney). I'm so beautiful and clever and I've never had sex and my breasts are real. Now run along plebs, work will set you free.

[Cheese Arse H Christ]

She's giving me a coded message that means she wants me to follow her around the world in exchange for sex

[untitled_london]

tbh, i dont really care what shes saying, i'd nob it until mine fell off.

[Sam]

Haha! Reminds me of one of my favourite Family Guy moments (in the one where Peter finds out he has a black ancestor). Peter is informing Chris about the family history and says that one of his ancestors was a great philosopher. It cuts to said ancestor in a chair lost in thought. His wife nags him, saying "You really should go to work". The philosopher ponders for a minute and then says "Why?" in a slow and mysterious way as if he were Descarte coming up with "Cogito, ergo sum".

Of course, like all Family Guy gags, it's all about the timing and context. I'm sure fellow FG fans will agree it's one of the best lines in the whole show.

[Smackhead Kangaroo]

Hey I knoew this one, although it should have been posted in that cryptic crossword thread it's....
umm...
hang on......
it's on the tip of my tongue...
Wait hang on isn't that a japanese ad slogan for a sanitary product?

[Hairy Chin]

I like the pirate voice dictation one.

[New World Order]

You've all got it completely wrong, the correct reaction to that is to say " wooooow, that's deep..." and from then on, permanently idolise thatt person on the basis that they said something once, that sounded like it meant something to someone, that was important.

All of you are so out of touch with the real world. I know exactly what she means.

Edit: Stop Pming me and asking for details ! Join the fanclubs like everyone else.

[hands cold, liver warm]

Dear world
This is your queen, Britney Spears speaking. The noise you can hear behind me is the bones being taken out of my legs and put into my lips and nose. I would like to welcome the countries of east europe into my enlarged breasts. This is ample reward for your years of suffering at the hands of Josef Christina Stalin Aquilera. I propose replacing the costly, non-competitve common agricultural policy with thoughts of happiness. This should has have the effect of tranquillising our being of being. Immigration issues been at the forefront of recent conferences between myself, my cat and my personnal hairdresser. To reduce the economic impact of intra-european migration, we propose a supposed show of forbidden pictures.

you may now return to your labours. Work will set you free.

Queen Spears

[Smackhead Kangaroo]

What's all this about her cha-cha's? Has she had another "growth spurt"? Where can I look upon these new melons of war?

[Ramses VIII]

She made my quote of the year last year when they asked  her about the war in Iraq..`I don`t know about that but i do have a new video coming out which is ,like, totally cool`

[New World Order]

Honestly, I think we should just trust our president in every decision that he makes and we should just support that," Said Britney.

That's the most horrifying of all of them in my opinion.  You might argue that she was told to say that by overpaid media advisers, but that makes it even worse !

She's admitted knowing nothing about Iraq, but is willing to back the president on every decision, a great reason to have her on CNN, nodding and agreeing.

[Ramses VIII]

I wouldn`t argue that she was told to say that. Britneys a dumbass-the end. She`s not gonna start coming on like Claire Short is she.

I personally find it more offensive when people like Sinead `O` Connor  and Jaz Coleman who never did anything for anybody start lecturing me about the New World Order and The Pope

[New World Order]

.......sorry

[Ramses VIII]

oh, you`ve just been told to say that..

[Apesod]

I like to call her Tit-knee Spears.....cos of the thing with her knee, y'know was it her knee or was it her tits? eh? eh?.................um

[Downs_Syndrome]

. Its like, really deep or somthing, coz like, she's sorta saying like that even though she's like really famous, she's still a  like totally spiritual person  who is like, being oppressed by her image and breasts or something. You should like be like totally free to like totally express yourself, like madonna said. like totally  whatever.

[elderford]

There was something in one of the papers last week about Madonna and that kooky jewish 'it's good to be rich' religion she's involved with.

Apparently other rich people who like it include: Courtney Love, someother rich people and Britney.

So she might be garbling some secondhand truth that has been revealed to her that she doesn't quite understand.

[Alberon]

She's in the final stages of her stardom. This sort of drivel always seems to appear near the end.

She's tried to boost her career by doing a track with Madonna. Next she'll try and boost it by working with one of the clones that is replacing her and then her fifteen minutes will be up.

Then the only publicity she'll get will be in the celebrity mags when she balloons to 16st and/or is caught shoplifting.

[MojoJojo]

I wouldn`t argue that she was told to say that. Britneys a dumbass-the end. She`s not gonna start coming on like Claire Short is she.

Yes, she is obviously an idiot, and I'm sure the knowledge of this keeps her awake at night while she sleeps in her gold-plated mansion.

Now, I'm not arguing that she's smart, just seems a bit stupid to accuse someone who earns more in a day than most of us will earn in a lifetime of being an idiot.

[Mister Six]

Why? She's a moron no matter how much money she has. All of the hard intellectual and creative work that went into making her a star was done by her songwriters, agent, choreographers, beauticians etc....

[MojoJojo]

Why? She's a moron no matter how much money she has. All of the hard intellectual and creative work that went into making her a star was done by her songwriters, agent, choreographers, beauticians etc....

Wow! So she gets all that money without doing any work? She must be an idiot!

[TraceyQ]

She's not a she. It's a product. Clever or no, she's sold herself into fame and she's suddenly got people wanting to listen to her music and look at her tits mixed up with thinking the public actually want to hear what she's got to say.

[Smackhead Kangaroo]

People want to listen to 'her' music?

i'll put up with her babble if I can look at her tits.
Not through her clothes of course that would be difficult.

Bring on the next tit bitch.

One thing that is interesting about this whole Pop bitch thing is that the virgin queen Britney appears to have easily outdone the whoremonkey Christina despite whore appeal and Christina having a voice.

This suggest to me that sex doesn't sell as well as people say

[FrizzBit]

It's because Christina is a SLAG.
I can't bear her. It offends me that someone with THAT much money can look THAT bad.

I hate her. I hope Kelly Osborne fists her so hard that her internal organs rupture and she dies screaming with agony in a pool of her own blood and Faeces and then Kelly hangs her fat, spoilt self in a prison cell.

[Mister Six]

Why? She's a moron no matter how much money she has. All of the hard intellectual and creative work that went into making her a star was done by her songwriters, agent, choreographers, beauticians etc....

Wow! So she gets all that money without doing any work? She must be an idiot!

She is, just a very fortunate one. You make her sound like some master villain, conspiring to make everyone do the hard work whilst she reaps the benefits. In reality, she's a pretty-but-dim girl with a workable voice who happened to be chosen by pop execs to be the latest brand. She's fortunate, not clever.