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July 17, 2024, 10:08:04 AM

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Favourite Stewart Lee Moments / Gags/ Quips

Started by markburgle, June 17, 2024, 08:39:15 PM

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markburgle

My favourite Stewart Lee moment/gag/quip is probably in 41st Best Standup ever - his enraged "I should at LEAST be paid for that" after the big buildup about how he was contractually obliged to perform at Pestival dressed as an Aphid for no reason because the pilot he was doing it for got pulled.

It's something about the context of the massive buildup, the bitterness, the final reveal he's not even being paid and the need to try and claw a crumb of dignity back.

What's yours? You're a fan of Stewart Lee aren't you?

Oh say you are!

Stinky Lomax


Not the most high brow choice, but him doing bird puns as plinny in histors eye never fails to make me laugh

"Who is St George histor? I have never bird egg wing"

sevendaughters

probably the bit in the recent Snowflake / Tornado one where he pedantically queues up at a baked potato van in Nottingham to correct them.

Mobbd

Coming at you, through a bothy, shortbread on its face.

non capisco

Gary Lineker is a twisted, evil man. You're going, 'No, he isn't, Stew. He's nice. He's like a velvet owl.'

madhair60


binster

This bit, starting at 7:45, mainly for the 'lift glasses, re-read the card to check that what he just said was accurate' bit at the end.

https://youtu.be/Uj2LcKdRU0o?si=PbvzfzbDo0PvSWhl&t=465

Crunk

Quote from: binster on June 17, 2024, 11:55:09 PMThis bit, starting at 7:45, mainly for the 'lift glasses, re-read the card to check that what he just said was accurate' bit at the end.

https://youtu.be/Uj2LcKdRU0o?si=PbvzfzbDo0PvSWhl&t=465

My fave is also a raising of the glasses. He was reading out insults he'd received and - I don't recall it exactly - the comment began something like "I'm speechless".

EDIT: I was wrong, it's not a glasses lift after all. 2:31 here: https://youtu.be/78Puggk5MCA?si=BDRN90pHPY1tHAlM&t=151
Sure there's another one that I like, but hey ho, this whole piece is fantastic.

Poirots BigGarlickyCorpse

I like his rant about how he hates the Travelodge from Comedy Vehicle. "I took the free biscuits and chewed them up in my mouth to form a paste, like a WASP would do".

I like the bit in Content Provider where he makes fun of "the under-40s", he doesn't say "millennials", he wouldn't do something trendy like that. Specifically the routine where he pantomimes slapping at a phone, and his pants fall down, and he continues the rest of his rant with his pants around his ankles. Near the end he grabs part of the mike stand and brandishes it at the audience like a walking stick, thus making fun of younger people while looking and acting like a mad old man.

The end of Content Provider is just fucking art (literally) and piss off if you don't agree.

Poirots BigGarlickyCorpse

Quote from: Crunk on June 18, 2024, 12:46:21 AMMy fave is also a raising of the glasses. He was reading out insults he'd received and - I don't recall it exactly - the comment began something like "I'm speechless".

EDIT: I was wrong, it's not a glasses lift after all. 2:31 here: https://youtu.be/78Puggk5MCA?si=BDRN90pHPY1tHAlM&t=151
Sure there's another one that I like, but hey ho, this whole piece is fantastic.
That just reminded me of Stew's routine about why he doesn't go on Twitter.

"I get home, go on Twitter, open it up... 'A fucking cunt came into my shop today. He looked like a paedophile, who would kill a child. I hope he dies of a wasting disease, and all cocks go in his mouth.'"

Ferris

Quote from: binster on June 17, 2024, 11:55:09 PMThis bit, starting at 7:45, mainly for the 'lift glasses, re-read the card to check that what he just said was accurate' bit at the end.

https://youtu.be/Uj2LcKdRU0o?si=PbvzfzbDo0PvSWhl&t=465

I love the reversal of that. "Hahaha Americans, what are they like" lulling you in, then pow actually turns out you are the prejudiced one.

Gurke and Hare


thenoise

I like it when he does a bit of mild physical comedy and gets out of breath less than 5 seconds in.

markburgle

"What's wrong with worshipping a tree?" from the UKIPs rant.

Saying "I hate Al Qaeda" in character as a self-righteous pub everyman. "Y'know I'm sorry if that's not... politically correct"



spaghetamine

way too many to mention but off the top of my head

"now, this book's not really aimed at me"

"golf is an abstract noun"

the entirety of the Russell Howard routine


GoblinAhFuckScary


Pink Gregory


Sonny_Jim

The miming of the eating of a poppadum.  Not because it was intrinsically funny but because of the circumstances I saw it.

Was sat on the couch with my Mum and my girlfriend, already a bit awkward as it's the first time they've met.  I'm flickering around the TV channels trying to find something to fill the void in the room and saw 'Comedy Vehicle'.  'Oh Stewart Lee, I like him', keen to show my Mum a bit of 'modern' comedy.  We landed right at the start of the poppadum bit with no setup, so it was absolutely excruciating to sit through.  Both my Mum and girlfriend thought less of me after that, I'm sure.

Terry Torpid

"A shit-haired cunt, with an Eskimo face from the 90s".

Pink Gregory

Quote from: Sonny_Jim on June 18, 2024, 12:08:25 PMThe miming of the eating of a poppadum.  Not because it was intrinsically funny but because of the circumstances I saw it.


"Every time you look at your watch, I start again."

Senior Baiano

QuoteMy wife had been away working for a couple of weeks, and she was coming back that night, so I thought I'd go and get a bottle of wine, you know, like I have on all the nights she's been away. So, I went to the corner shop in Hackney. I thought, "I'm not going to get a 3.99, cheapskate bottle of wine. "I'm not going to get an 18.99 bottle of wine, like I've been unfaithful or something. "I'm going to get a 12.99 bottle of wine.
"That's the kind of guy I am, I'm a 12.99 bottle of wine kind of guy. I took the 12.99 bottle of wine up to the guy at the counter, and he looked down at it and he said to me, "That's the best wine in the shop. You have good taste, sir. "And just making chit-chat, just friendly banter, I said to him, "I'll tell my wife you said that. "She'll be very surprised to find out that I've got good taste." Just making sort of chit-chat, banter with the bloke. And then he said, "Yes... Bitches. You try and do your best for women, but they all just run us down, the fucking bitches."
That's a little bit I like to call When Polite Conversation Goes Wrong.

Gulftastic

It's a well known bit but his description of Russell Brand.

Also his breakdown of Brand apologising for the bad racism on CBB.

Ferris

Top Gear fans being "clad head to toe in supermarket denim".

Psybro

Quote from: spaghetamine on June 18, 2024, 11:47:27 AM"now, this book's not really aimed at me"


the entirety of the Russell Howard routine
Came here to post that specific line, and "mmmaaaatte noooo" from the latter.  Also "you finned cunt" and "come on Hammond, kick a tramp to death, kick him right up in his guts"

madhair60

"If a real hamster survived a dragster crash and advertised for Morrison's, admittedly with a glazed expression, I'd say "That's a good hamster."

Tiggles

Too many... just to pick one, the whole thing about describing himself as "Scotch" to an audience in Glasgow.

Also, "The money is mine".

momatt

I love all his stand-up, but honestly the funniest moments are just the silly noises he makes.

"Mmmm, lovely milk, slurp slurp slurp..."
I can't even remember when and why he says this, but it goes through my head all the time.

chutnut

"I am just joking like how they do on top gear!"

madhair60

"all gravy and like... soup or something... on his sleeves... Rod Liddle..."

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