our police force

[madhair60]

ever had an encounter with "the filth"

[shoulders]

No but I did have an unpleasant encounter with the boys in blue.


I
SAW



THE


BLUE
MAN
GROUP

[Stoneage Dinosaurs]

More like the police "farce"!!!

Actually more like the "bollocks" "farce"!!!

Actually more like the "not nice" "racist rapists emporium"!!!

[Stoneage Dinosaurs]

Although I've never had a run in with them and say excuse me and doff my cap whenever I pass them in the street

[BlodwynPig]

Although I've never had a run in with them and say excuse me and doff my cap whenever I pass them in the street

Doesn't work with the new breed. You'd receive less scorn and abuse if you did this with a group of shady yoofs.

[Jockice]

ever had an encounter with "the filth"

Got nicked once. The weekend before my 19th birthday after having a row with a mate in the city centre. Drunk and disorderly apparently. I wasn't really the first but I booted a wastepaper bin into the road so I suppose I was the second. Got fined 25 quid. My only criminal conviction. In court it was claimed I gave a 'vaguely obscene reply' when I was asked to pick it up. I swear I didn't. I really fucking swear I didn't. Had just started my first newspaper job so they had to report on it. Which caused great hilarity but not for me.

Apart from that:
Got breathalysed once. Was in a crash at two minutes to midnight one Christmas Eve. Not my fault. But the other driver was 17, had just passed his test the previous day and it was his mum's car so I can see why he insisted on getting the cops involved. If I was pissed he was off the hook. Unfortunately for him I hadn't touched a drop and the insurers found him responsible. I also had a crash which was my fault a few years later but didn't get breathlysed this time and the female officer who was dealing with it was quite nice and sympathetic to me. No charges followed.

Got stopped on New Year's Eve a few years after that as they said I'd gone through a red light. I'd dispute that but once they realised I hadn't been drinking they sent me on my way, saying they had better things to do that night.

Got punched in the stomach by an officer outside a nightclub on a birthday in my early 20s. There was some trouble which was nothing to do with me, but got told to go up the road. I was waiting for a friend who was in the chippie, tried to explain this and was still told to move. Which I did but said the word 'wanker' in a quiet voice as I walked off. Not quiet enough obviously.

At an Arab Strap concert I attended (alone) in the late 90s, some Student Grant type tried to kick my crutches away from behind me, I turned round and punched him (still not sure how I managed that without falling over) he got chucked out by the bouncers and one of his mates then started on me and pushed me over. Police got called, he was arrested and afterwards I had to be escorted back to my car by security staff in case anyone was waiting to wreak revenge on me. Not sure if anyone got charged. I didn't hear any more.

Got followed home by a police car once after buying some bread from a shop on my way home from a concert on a Sunday night. The rozzer drove past after I had just put my crutches into the car and obviously thought: "He's a bit wobbly. Bet he's had a few." I hadn't. I've also been questioned on three or four other occasions while getting in or out of my car. Although not since I started using a wheelchair.

As mentioned in another recent thread, got briefly questioned outside my hometown's Premier Inn during the summer when three police vans turned up just as I was about to go in after attending a wedding reception. Told them I was a guest and didn't know about what was going on. Still don't. They let me go and nobody in the hotel mentioned it the next day.

I think that's about it. I've lived quite a crime-free life after all.

[shiftwork2]

I got a full blue light traffic stop last year.  Now one would like to imagine a cool demeanour for this particular sit but I completely shat it.  It turns out my number plate was dirty - presumably his ANPR gave the Family Fortunes X sound.  However it also said Redacted East Anglian city dealership on my numberplate while I was in the other one, and you can imagine what the nubbin-for-a-thumb lot are like round here.  Anyway like a good boy I cleaned my numberplate with a Starbucks napkin and went off to do crimes.

[GMTV]

When I was 19 was walking along with pals and a couple of coppers were in front. We were smashed, and my pals in their infinite wisdom started shouting stuff like pigs, scum etc. The coppers then turn around and grab me, the one who wasnt saying anything. They then proceeded to dish out a fairly severe Glasgow slagging. Look at the state of you, you're a joke, imagine shouting at police officers. Your clothes are shite etc etc. Then sent me on my way. Was kinda funny in a way.

When I was 23 and had just got a car I got done a couple of times for driving offenses. A police van was behind me and I went through a red light. And I got caught with a speed gun doing 50 in a 30.

And thus ends my criminal record.

[salr]

Had quite a few interactions with the police over the years, pretty much always involving drink.

They have always been fair/reasonable with me. Maybe that's just white/middle class/male privilege.

Only one where I thought maybe it was a bit off. I was driving on my own late at night. A bit fast around motorway sliproads/roundabouts near where I live. Saw some headlights catching up with me quite fast so I slowed down to the speed-limit. They sat behind me on the motorway for a mile or two, so close to my rear bumper I could hardly see their headlights. I thought they were maybe police trying to goad me into going faster to pin a worse crime on me so stuck to the speed limit. Eventually the blue lights came on, they pulled me over and gave my a bollocking.

Generally a few nights spent sobering up in a custody cell, but again they would usually bring you cups of water/tea and an itchy blanket (ac was fierce)

[Jockice]

When I was 23 and had just got a car I got done a couple of times for driving offenses. A police van was behind me and I went through a red light. And I got caught with a speed gun doing 50 in a 30.

And thus ends my criminal record.

Oh yeah, three speeding fines. Although the police weren't involved. Once trying to get out of Doncaster (with very good reason), and twice within a year or so on my way to 40th birthday parties in cities (Glasgow and Liverpool) I know pretty well but obviously misread the signs while going through. I was in another crash (a not my fault one. Someone reversed out of their drive into me) while I had those six points though and realised as soon as it happened I hadn't told my insurers about the points. They were fine about it though.

[Jockice]

Got breathalysed once. Was in a crash at two minutes to midnight one Christmas Eve.

On a later Christmas Eve they were doing random checks on drivers on a dual carriageway and I was one of those pulled over. I was taking a couple of mates home, they asked me if I'd been drinking, I said no and they let me carry on. After I'd dropped my friends off (which took me about half an hour as they both lived a few miles away, I decided to go down the dual carriageway again, although there was no need to, just to see what happened. They took one glimpse at me, one of the rozzers said: "We've already done you,'' and waved me on.

Very observant of them I always thought.

But finally, after a night out a few years ago I really fancied fish and chips. But when I got to the nearest chippie it was shut. So I parked round the corner while thinking if there would be any other places open. Next thing I knew a car pulled up, blocking me in ,and three burly blokes got out. I didn't have a clue what was going on but they were plain clothes officers who had seen me take a swig of something and suspected it was alcohol. It was diet coke. All I can say is they must have been having a very boring night's duty.

[Zero Gravitas]

Very observant of them I always thought.

You could simply have been memorably attractive?

[Jockice]

You could simply have been memorably attractive?

I certainly like to imagine so.

[gib]

Yes, been arrested twice.

The second time was for assaulting a police officer, later reduced to public order. Dragged on for months and was told i would probably get a custodial.

I had not assaulted anyone, the met are lying cunts. Ended up paying a hefty fine and i paid it on the day of sentencing, not unlike that Sting in quadrophenia.

[jamiefairlie]

Yes, been arrested twice.

The second time was for assaulting a police officer, later reduced to public order. Dragged on for months and was told i would probably get a custodial.

I had not assaulted anyone, the met are lying cunts. Ended up paying a hefty fine and i paid it on the day of sentencing, not unlike that Sting in quadrophenia.

Which hotel do you work in?

[Toki]

A friend from school days joined the police, he's a good bloke. A complete cunt from school days also joined the police and is, as mentioned, a complete cunt. The second guy is the one who doesn't seem seriously depressed whenever I see him.

I've had the police called on me while in a state of mania, but they didn't put me in the cells, which I found odd when I came out of it. I also had other policeman turn up at the door a couple of days later about a dispute my parents were having with some neighbours. On their way out they said 'try not to look so guilty when you answer the door.'

Bit of a mixed bag.

[Toki]

Oh, and I was pepper sprayed by an off-duty drunk officer of the law when I was 4.

[Sebastian Cobb]

Not had much dealings with them.

Once went up an alleyway for a piss while drunk and a car came to a screeching stop before I'd even got my lad out. Contritely admitted I was away for a slash but they interrupted me too early. Seems there was already a puddle from someone else, I told them to check the temperature of it as it wasn't mine.

"<eyerolling sigh> go home and don't have a piss on the way".

[Jockice]

This is the last one. Honest. About nine years ago I slightly clipped a parked car while turning a corner. I don't think I did much (if any) damage. But there were a few people in an office forecourt opposite having their lunch or smoking and for some reason I panicked and drove off. As soon as I'd done it I realised I'd done a very stupid thing as people would have seen it and cameras have phones nowadays. It may even have been one of their cars.

I did go back later that day but the car had gone. I should have left my number at the workplace but decided to hope against hope that nobody had noted/snapped my number plate.

It wasn't long after  Ed Balls got done for a similar incident - 900 quid fine, five points on his licence - so I was crapping myself and a couple of weeks later I returned home to find a note on my door telling me to ring the police. I did but it took them another fortnight to turn up. Their first words were: "You know what this is about don't you?" Of course I do. It's why I'd hardly slept for a month.

After having a chat I was told they'd decided not to prosecute but if I ever did it again they would. I also got a warning letter. So all's well that ends well. Apart from reporting it to the insurers. They weren't happy.

[Jockice]

Not had much dealings with them.

Once went up an alleyway for a piss while drunk and a car came to a screeching stop before I'd even got my lad out. Contritely admitted I was away for a slash but they interrupted me too early. Seems there was already a puddle from someone else, I told them to check the temperature of it as it wasn't mine.

"<eyerolling sigh> go home and don't have a piss on the way".

Oh yeah I had that once. In the back courtyard of a bakery. I couldn't really deny what I was about to do but the officer just said: "As long as you're not screwing the place."

Luckily little did he know about the sticking my nob into loaves fetish I suffer from.
Lol

[lauraxsynthesis]

A friend and I used salt shakers to draw circle As on dining tables in the town's university when we were teenagers. The popo were called by canteen staff ffs and they arrested her but just rang my parents. I've never understood the different treatment - they just didn't like her attitude? She ended up getting shot to death 2 years later by a police officer in California who had just returned from duty after being shot himself.

Apart from that, I once witnessed domestic violence outside a pub and gave a statement. And of course the Met came to my house when my husband died. Would be good if someone not the police could take the details in those situations, but I suppose that's unavoidable.

ACAB and all that but the domestic violence specialist dude seemed to be doing a good job in context, so mixed feelings. Having said that,

CONTENT WARNING: SA


a female friend was sexually assaulted by an officer at Charing Cross police station while handcuffed. She'd been arrested on an animal rights demo having done fuck all to warrant arrest.

[Sebastian Cobb]

One thing I probably should know, and don't is who you're supposed to call if you find a cold stiff, whether it's something you encounter where they're 'definitely dead' or a relative dying at home, it doesn't seem like a 999 job.

[shiftwork2]

01 811 9055

[imitationleather]

Got arrested when I was 17 for throwing traffic cones at a police station with former poster mayer.

Top night 10/10 would do again.

Fuck me, that was 20 years ago.

[markburgle]

Got arrested at the hotel I was working in. Me and my mate had been on a spiteful campaign of nicking sugar sachets, toilet rolls, tea towels etc, as when we'd been homeless the management of the (empty, off season) hotel wouldn't let us take a room. Once they had witnesses they called the police, who arrested me mid-shift (mate was off that day, so he avoided the whole ordeal), took me home to collect the "loot", then took me to the station to be interviewed. The PC was nice, but the WPC was really playing "moral outrage" to the hilt and giving me a hard time. Got cautioned (and sacked, obviously).

Was busking in London once and swigging lager from a tin like an absolute ledge. Copper came over to me and I said "oh, I know where this is going" and he went "I'll tell you where that's going - down your neck. We're not all bastards". Then left saying not to do it again.

Rolling a spliff in the park with some mates. Got surprised somehow by a filth (not sure how, thinking about it - big open space like that). Similar to the WPC in the first story, she was laying on the outrage really thick and mentioning there was a school nearby (insinuating we were somehow intending to sell kids drugs on a Sunday). The combination of the lost spliff, and the head-full of snarky comebacks I'd felt unable to say for fear of escalating things, made this one particularly infuriating.

When I lived in Falmouth, returned from a few days away but was too late for the last train from Truro. It's about 10 miles so I started walking, but with 3 miles to go I was ready to admit defeat and lie down in a field to rest, when a police car pulled up. They wanted to know why I walking through a secluded hamlet in the middle of the night with a duffle bag over my shoulder. I told them, then said "don't suppose you fancy giving me a lift do you?". They asked what was in the bag and I said "dirty laundry". They drove me home.

[touchingcloth]

You're not supposed to call them the police "force" any more because it sounds too aggressive, so you should call them the bastard force instead.

[H-O-W-L]

ullo ullo ullo ullo ullo ullo ullo ullo ullo ullo ullo ullo ullo ullo ullo ullo ullo ullo ullo ullo ullo ullo ullo ullo

[Steve Faeces]

I was urinating in the street opposite Cardiff Castle and got caught. I can't really remember what happened but friend (who had also been pissing in public but had the good sense to go down a side road) told me I was quite belligerent and "I'll piss where I fucking want" or similar was said. Grateful to him for de-escalating a situation that I imagine was getting out of hand. Got a penalty notice. Was being an inconsiderate arsehole and deserved it really.

Was arrested on some sort of disorder offence at the student protests in 2010 in London. Nothing came of it and in my defence I was trying to leave the area and the police behaved appallingly during those demos. They were up for a confrontation.

Entirely unnecessarily told a police officer to "cheer the fuck up" whilst I was celebrating in the street after a football match and received a talking to. 

Also received a "cannabis warning" and proceeded to get a penalty notice and fine for the same thing not that long after in almost exactly the same location near Liverpool Street Station.

Heavy drinking involved in all of these regrettable incidents. Don't go in for that sort of thing at all these days and as a result am a law abiding citizen and generally more reasonable person.

[Jockice]

Oh yeah I had that once. In the back courtyard of a bakery. I couldn't really deny what I was about to do but the officer just said: "As long as you're not screwing the place."

Luckily little did he know about the sticking my nob into loaves fetish I suffer from.
Lol

Where the fuck did that 'Lol' come from? It's not an expression or word I've ever used in my life. Unless it's referring to him from The Cure.

[Brass Moustache]

I don't have enough melanin.