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Houses of Porniment

Started by Bobloblawslawbomb, April 27, 2022, 01:25:05 PM

Previous topic - Next topic
Tories investigate reports MP watched pornography in Commons chamber https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-politics-61245040

Dirty get

Butchers Blind


JamesTC

This will just make them more popular like in that Ali G film.

robhug

do people watch porn in a non-wanking scenario? I'm highly suspicious of these sort of reports.

imitationleather

Quote from: robhug on April 27, 2022, 01:30:42 PMdo people watch porn in a non-wanking scenario? I'm highly suspicious of these sort of reports.

What makes you think he wasn't wanking?

robhug

Quote from: imitationleather on April 27, 2022, 01:31:21 PMWhat makes you think he wasn't wanking?

I'm confident that would have been a bigger headline

imitationleather

He was probably just watching it because of the engrossing plot.

I'm the same and can't get enough of those will they, won't they storylines in porn.

(SPOILER: They always will.)

Joe Qunt

Quote from: robhug on April 27, 2022, 01:30:42 PMdo people watch porn in a non-wanking scenario?

Plenty of them:

  • Mate's just told you about a specific video
  • Trying to find HD screenshots for a meme
  • Research
  • Hiding the fact you're investing in crypto
  • Testing the parental settings on your broadband
  • You're a porn critic and merely doing your job


robhug

"if she's not careful she's going to break that coffee table"

Martin Van Buren Stan

Is it possible that he was just browsing twitter and a video briefly popped up? Seems hard to believe he'd do it in the chamber where there are dozens of seats above and all around from every angle.

jobotic

Tory front bencher?

My God the consequences. They won't know what's hit them.

Jittlebags

Talk about Right Horny Members.

Butchers Blind

Jacob Rees Mogg. Not that it is him, but if it was...

JaDanketies

Quote from: robhug on April 27, 2022, 01:30:42 PMdo people watch porn in a non-wanking scenario? I'm highly suspicious of these sort of reports.

I used to look at a few dirty pics for a quick dopamine hit in a job I hated when everyone on the top floor except for me left.

I used to masturbate every single day at my old workplace. I used mobile data though, so it wasn't gross misconduct. Hated that job too. Although in fairness I have hated every single job I've had after I stopped working in a bar and I only liked that cos I was drunk.

shit like this is what blocks the common man from entering politics

Amazing that this has all come out because of that partygate distraction smear about Angela Rayner.



"We've embroiled our own party in a sexism scandal by mistake."

Sebastian Cobb

Quote from: robhug on April 27, 2022, 01:30:42 PMdo people watch porn in a non-wanking scenario? I'm highly suspicious of these sort of reports.

Not exactly watching full porn but close to it, when I worked for a chain of bookies there was a shop on the outskirts ran by a bunch of LADS that had things like topless women stuck to the inside of the cupboards like Fletch's cell cupboard in Porridge. One of the wedge-shaped under-table bins for punters to throw their losing tickets into had also been screwed to the wall in the bog and repurposed into a magazine rack, housing things like Nuts, Zoo etc. Grim, I think they got away with it because the shop was on the outskirts with no competition - it was one of the better performing shops and as a black box toed the line so area managers couldn't be fucked visiting it, it was mostly just cashiers who'd get bussed there to fill in.

Inspector Norse

Lest we forget, when Damien Green's work computer was found to be FULL OF PORN in 2008, it was dismissed by the police and his colleagues as a side issue (he was, admittedly, under arrest for something completely different at the time) and only came to public notice nine years later when he was found to be a massive fucking sex pest and vindictive liar.

Inspector Norse

Quote from: Sebastian Cobb on April 27, 2022, 02:59:44 PMNot exactly watching full porn but close to it, when I worked for a chain of bookies there was a shop on the outskirts ran by a bunch of LADS that had things like topless women stuck to the inside of the cupboards like Fletch's cell cupboard in Porridge. One of the wedge-shaped under-table bins for punters to throw their losing tickets into had also been screwed to the wall in the bog and repurposed into a magazine rack, housing things like Nuts, Zoo etc. Grim, I think they got away with it because the shop was on the outskirts with no competition - it was one of the better performing shops and as a black box toed the line so area managers couldn't be fucked visiting it, it was mostly just cashiers who'd get bussed there to fill in.

Still remember going to the high school caretaker's office when I was in about Year 10 and noticing that he had the walls plastered with page 3 girls and the like. On top of this, there were two lads in my year who spent their break times hanging around the office "helping him out", their form tutors possibly under the impression they were getting useful vocational training.

Catalogue of ills

Quote from: jobotic on April 27, 2022, 02:02:16 PMTory front bencher?

My God the consequences. They won't know what's hit them.

Some spunk

Ian Drunken Smurf

Quote from: Inspector Norse on April 27, 2022, 03:01:28 PMLest we forget, when Damien Green's work computer was found to be FULL OF PORN in 2008, it was dismissed by the police and his colleagues as a side issue (he was, admittedly, under arrest for something completely different at the time) and only came to public notice nine years later when he was found to be a massive fucking sex pest and vindictive liar.

This could be "Workplace Wankathon Part 2"

Dr Rock

I thought the legal term was 'making porn' like when they make it seem like nonces were filming kids rather than they downloaded something.

So let's get it right, the Tory was making incest* porn in the house of commons.


*might as well have a guess.

Captain Z

"At least he knows what a woman is"

Butchers Blind

What if it's Nadine Dorres? Makes you think.

Video Game Fan 2000

Maybe he was queering the house, did anyone think of that

Proper "she's no angel" deflection from the attorney general. Women in their pants on Instagram mean that MPs have no choice but to act like horny gibbons.

QuoteShe said that while people now felt more empowered than they did in the past (as an example, she cited people feeling free to post photographs of themselves online in their underwear), this was linked to a "coarsening of our behaviour in our culture". She went on: "So I think as a society we've got to take this moment to reflect on what are we doing to lower standards of behaviour, whether that's on the tube, in front of children, in parliament or in public.

The problem doesn't start in parliament. It actually ends up there, and it starts in wider society, and that's where we need to start discussing and agreeing some basic moral standards."

Stoneage Dinosaurs


Psybro

There are bad guys on the non-wanking side too

dissolute ocelot

Quote from: Butchers Blind on April 27, 2022, 02:38:00 PMJacob Rees Mogg. Not that it is him, but if it was...
He was watching Derek Jarman's Sebastiane but purely because of the Latin dialog.

How long would you have to watch over someone's shoulder to know it was definitely porn and not HBO? I'm not saying MPs should be watching Game of Thrones or a 1990s Kama Sutra VHS or Confessions of a Window Cleaner while at work. And I'm sure most Tory MPs would be able to enumerate the genres in Porn Hub over your shoulder in an instant, even better than a 17 year old with gigabit broadband. But until we know what kind of porn it is, it's impossible to know what kind of ridicule is required.

Ferris

Quote from: Huxleys Babkins on April 27, 2022, 02:49:56 PMAmazing that this has all come out because of that partygate distraction smear about Angela Rayner.



"We've embroiled our own party in a sexism scandal by mistake."

"We are not from London you know.