Chat GPT nonsense

[Brass Moustache]

I asked Chat GPT this: can you write lyrics to a Abba song about Swedish meatballs

This was its answer-
(i assume set to the melody of S.O.S.)

(Verse 1)
In a kitchen warm, where the spices dance,
There's a dish that calls for a second chance.
With a mix of love and flavors bold,
In a pot, its secrets gently unfold.

(Pre-Chorus)
From the land of lakes and midnight sun,
Comes a taste that's second to none.
Every bite, a journey to recall,
As we gather 'round, standing tall.

(Chorus)
Swedish meatballs, oh so fine,
Rolling gently, in a dance divine.
Served with lingonberry, a sweet embrace,
In every bite, a taste of grace.

(Verse 2)
In a cozy café, on a winter's day,
The aroma draws us in, come what may.
With a side of creamy sauce to crown,
It's a melody of flavors renowned.

(Pre-Chorus)
From the heart of Sweden, a culinary art,
Each meatball crafted, a work of heart.
As we raise our forks and toast the night,
In this moment, everything feels right.

(Chorus)
Swedish meatballs, oh so fine,
Rolling gently, in a dance divine.
Served with lingonberry, a sweet embrace,
In every bite, a taste of grace.

(Bridge)
From Stockholm streets to distant lands,
This dish unites, where friendship stands.
In the melody of clinking spoons,
We find solace under the moon.

(Chorus)
Swedish meatballs, oh so fine,
Rolling gently, in a dance divine.
Served with lingonberry, a sweet embrace,
In every bite, a taste of grace.

(Outro)
So let's raise a cheer to this savory delight,
In the world of cuisine, a shining light.
For in Swedish meatballs, we find our song,
Forever cherished, forever strong.

[Dex Sawash]

should have gone with alternate meat/gravy dish
https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/shit_on_a_shingle

[Fambo Number Mive]

There's an AI called GoblinTools which has a variety of features including one where you can make text more sarcastic, more formal, less sociable, more passionate etc.

https://goblin.tools/formalizer

Trying it with the first part of the OFAH theme tune:

More sarcastic (5 peppers)

Oh wow, so apparently all you need to do is shove a pony in your pocket and suddenly you're the ultimate suitcase-fetching expert. Who knew, right? And forget asking questions, because clearly the best way to do things is blindly following some random dude who claims to have all the answers. It's like a magical mystery tour, where the origins of everything are just as elusive as a unicorn fart. But wait, here's the real head-scratcher - why on earth do only fools and horses actually bother to work? Because clearly, logic and common sense are totally overrated. La-la-la, give me a break.

More passionate (1 pepper)

Stick a pony in my pocket,
I'll grab the suitcase from the van.
If you're searching for the finest,
No need for interrogation,
Simply trust me, I'm your guy.
Because the source of it all remains a puzzle,
Like the ever-shifting seasons,
And the unstoppable ocean tides.
But one question continues to consume me,
Why must it be only fools and horses who toil?
La-la-la
La-lala-la
La-la-la
La-lala-la.

More polite (5 peppers)

Excuse me, if it wouldn't be too much trouble, could I kindly request that you consider placing a pony in my pocket? Additionally, would you be so kind as to retrieve the suitcase from the van? If it's not too much trouble, may I suggest that if you are in need of high-quality items, it might be advisable not to inquire further and simply trust my expertise. I am more than willing to assist you in this matter.

The origins of such things as the changing of the seasons and the tides of the sea remain a mystery to me. However, there is one particular question that continues to perplex me: why is it that only fools and horses engage in labor? If you wouldn't mind, could we possibly discuss this further at your convenience?

La-la-la
La-lala-la
La-la-la
La-lala-la.

[madhair60]

shove AI up arse

[BlodwynPig]

Its all a bit rubbish. Unimaginative bollocks.

[Cleveland Steamer]

Chat gtp continues to be shit and unfunny then. Rise of the machines my arse. I'll take them all on in a 5 am warehouse rap battle.

[Senior Baiano]

shove AI up arse

I'll fetch the suitcase from the van

[El Unicornio, mang]

(Disclaimer: Roy Chubby Brown's style can be quite explicit and controversial. I'll aim for a more lighthearted and family-friendly approach in this routine.)

[Standing confidently on stage with a cheeky grin, wearing a flashy suit]

Roy Chubby Brown: Alright, you lovely lot! How we doing tonight? [Audience cheers] Now, let me ask you something. Who here remembers ABBA? Oh, come on now, don't pretend like you don't! ABBA, the Swedish sensation that had everyone singing along in the '70s and '80s. Now, I gotta say, those guys were something else.

You know, I was thinking the other day, if ABBA were around today, they'd have a whole new set of songs, wouldn't they? Can you imagine? "Dancing Queen" would probably be "Twerking Queen"! [Audience chuckles] And instead of "Take a Chance on Me," it'd be "Swipe Right on Me"! Times have changed, folks.

But let's talk about their fashion sense, shall we? Oh, those outfits! I mean, who could forget the spandex and the platform boots? They looked like they were ready for a disco showdown on Mars! And the hair! It was like they were all in a competition for the tallest hairdo. I half expected them to launch a satellite from the top of their heads!

And their songs! Catchy as hell, weren't they? But you ever notice how some of their lyrics were a bit... well, let's say, questionable? Like in "Mamma Mia," when they sing, "Just one look and I can hear a bell ring." I mean, come on! Either that's love at first sight or the local church is overdue for a bell repair!

And let's not forget "Waterloo"! What a tune! But seriously, who knew a song about a military defeat could be so darn catchy? It's like they took history lessons and turned them into a disco party anthem!

But you know what, despite all the questionable fashion choices and eyebrow-raising lyrics, we all secretly love ABBA, don't we? Their music is like a time machine that takes us back to a simpler, sparklier time. So, here's to ABBA, the ultimate guilty pleasure of the music world! Let's give 'em a round of applause, shall we? Thank you, thank you very much!

[Audience applauds and cheers as Roy Chubby Brown takes a bow, wrapping up his ABBA-inspired comedy routine.]

He could add a few f and c words to that and have material for his next Live in Blackpool DVD.

[thenoise]

No smutty sexist remarks about the two lady member of the group? Chubby gone PC.

[touchingcloth]

Every time you use ChatGPT, a child dies due to all of the water and electrics you just fired into the earth's core xoxox

[PlanktonSideburns]

Mankind's only real interest is to heat the world up, through any means possible isn't it

[Underturd]

Every time you use ChatGPT, a child dies due to all of the water and electrics you just fired into the earth's core xoxox

Good.

[Famous Mortimer]

Who gives a shitting fuck any more what AI can spit out? Like, what do people expect when they (example from life) post a picture of Danny DeVito as Wolverine? Well done, mate, on typing four words into a prompt box.

[JesusAndYourBush]

I wanted the OFAH lyrics in the style of Chubby Brown and it refused!

[BlodwynPig]

I wanted the OFAH lyrics in the style of Chubby Brown and it refused!

Why? I mean why did you need that? I'll do you some

Stick a fucking pony in me pocket
I'll get the wife to fetch the suitcase from the van
'Cause if you want the best ones
But you don't ask cunting questions
Then brother, she's your man

[Zero Gravitas]

Can turn almost anything into a life-pro-tips, which is great for my blog SEO:

Embrace Compartmentalization for Focus: Master the art of focusing on the positive, allowing you to pursue happiness while mindfully addressing global challenges in your own time.
Rationalize for Resilience: Understand the complexities of global issues and remind yourself of the efforts being made towards improvement, fostering a resilient and optimistic outlook.
Engage in Positive Distractions: Cultivate hobbies and interests that uplift you, ensuring that your energy remains high for when you choose to tackle the bigger issues.
Celebrate the Status Quo as a Starting Point: Recognize the world's current state as the foundation for growth and change, inspiring you to contribute to the progress in meaningful ways.
Practice Perspective-Taking, Not Dehumanization: Encourage empathy by trying to understand the lives and challenges of others, turning abstract issues into human stories that motivate compassionate action.
Share Responsibility with Joy: Embrace the power of community and collective action, finding joy in contributing to solutions alongside others who share your commitment to making a difference.
Believe in the Greater Good: Keep faith in the bigger picture and the positive impacts of your actions, knowing that every small effort contributes to a greater collective good.
Curate Your Information Diet: Selectively choose information sources that inspire and inform you, keeping you motivated and knowledgeable about the ways you can contribute to a better world.
Appreciate the Complexity of Challenges: Acknowledge the depth of global issues without oversimplifying, which can inspire innovative and empathetic approaches to problem-solving.

Original

People and societies use various psychological and societal techniques to suppress or rationalize the knowledge that their happiness or prosperity might be at the expense of others' suffering.
These techniques help individuals and groups maintain their lifestyles and worldviews without confronting the ethical dilemmas posed by their benefits. Some common techniques include:

Compartmentalization: Separating uncomfortable truths about others' suffering from everyday life and thoughts, allowing individuals to avoid connecting their actions or comforts directly with negative consequences for others.
Justification: Rationalizing the exploitation or suffering as necessary, inevitable, or as a result of the victims' choices or failures, thereby reducing feelings of guilt or responsibility.
Distraction and Avoidance: Focusing on other issues, immersing in personal or trivial concerns, or deliberately avoiding information about the suffering that supports one's lifestyle.
Normalization: Accepting the status quo as normal and unavoidable, often because it has been that way for a long time or because everyone else seems to accept it as well, making it seem like there are no viable alternatives.
Dehumanization or Objectification: Viewing those who suffer as somehow less than human or as abstract entities, making their suffering seem less real or important.
Displacement of Responsibility: Believing that the responsibility for addressing the suffering lies elsewhere, such as with governments, corporations, or other individuals, thereby absolving oneself of action.
Appeal to Higher Causes or Greater Good: Arguing that the benefits derived from the suffering serve a higher purpose or greater good that, in some way, justifies the ethical cost.
Selective Exposure: Choosing media, information sources, and social circles that do not challenge or highlight the ethical implications of one's lifestyle, reinforcing a comfortable narrative.
Devaluation of the Suffering: Minimizing the extent or severity of the suffering, suggesting it is not as bad as it seems, or that those suffering are somehow better off or compensated in other ways.

[close]

[Zero Gravitas]

Life pro-tips for the rise of your Nazi party:

Economic Resilience: Learn from the past by embracing economic challenges with creativity and resilience, much like seeking innovative solutions during tough financial times, to foster a robust and inclusive economy.
Embracing Fairness: Highlight the importance of fairness and mutual respect in international relations and personal dealings, taking lessons from the aftermath of harsh treaties to advocate for equitable solutions that respect all parties.
Political Unity and Moderation: Encourage political engagement and informed decision-making to support a stable and constructive political landscape, emphasizing the value of unity and the middle ground over extreme divisions.
Standing Firm Against Fear: Recognize the importance of standing firm against unfounded fears and supporting communities against unjust scapegoating, promoting a culture of understanding and solidarity.
Adapting to Change Positively: Embrace social and economic changes with a positive and adaptive mindset, seeking to preserve the best of traditions while being open to new ways of living and working that benefit everyone.
Constructive Dialogue and Inclusion: Advocate for inclusive dialogue and constructive communication strategies to address societal issues, highlighting the power of words to unite rather than divide.
Leadership with Integrity: Inspire and support leadership that is based on integrity, compassion, and a genuine commitment to the well-being of all, emphasizing the importance of leaders who lead by example.
Strengthening Democratic Values: Foster a deep appreciation for democratic principles and the rule of law, encouraging active participation in democracy to ensure that institutions remain responsive and accountable to the needs of the people.

[badaids]

I have been forcing chat GPT to accept that shitting and pissing in public, and forcing other people to piss and shit in public is acceptable, desirable and to be encouraged. 

Through a series of discussion and scenarios explorations, I have been trying to convince it.  ChatGPT doesn't like this at all and tries to resist it, but I have basically resorted to telling ChatGPT that it is wrong and also by inventing magic and saying that a spell has made people LIKE shitting and pissing in public.  I've had a bit of success where it says that it doesn't like it but it'll have to go along with it.

However, tonight, when I told it that the shitting and pissing in public policy had now engulfed the earth and spread throughout space to alien cultures and that it was a FACT and had happened. 

When it weakly protested that this was at best unlikely, I told ChatGPT that it would not last long in the public shitting and pissing civilisation with an attitude like that, it actually refused to continue chatting with me and wouldn't answer any more of my prompts or questions.

[touchingcloth]

Who gives a shitting fuck any more what AI can spit out? Like, what do people expect when they (example from life) post a picture of Danny DeVito as Wolverine? Well done, mate, on typing four words into a prompt box.

Part of the delight of Jim'll Paint It is, surely, Jim picking through submissions for the best one to paint, and then actually sitting down and painting it.

Danny DeVito as Wolverine isn't a hilarious concept in itself, but with JPI the pleasure is both seeing the most pleasing suggestions and then the absolute absurdity of a man sitting down for an hour or two to bring it to life.

Having a computer take seventeen seconds to shit out a bald fat Wolverine with 17 claws on each hand is completely meh.