Tip jar

If you like CaB and wish to support it, you can use PayPal or KoFi. Thank you, and I hope you continue to enjoy the site - Neil.

Buy Me a Coffee at ko-fi.com

Support CaB

Recent

Welcome to Cook'd and Bomb'd. Please login or sign up.

March 28, 2024, 02:08:58 PM

Login with username, password and session length

A serial lawbreaking liar - Alexander Boris de Pfeffel Johnson scandal thread 2

Started by Fambo Number Mive, April 19, 2022, 01:46:53 PM

Previous topic - Next topic

Fambo Number Mive

I don't know how Johnson thinks he has the right to tell others what to do but apparently he seems to think that because he is too lazy to do work while at home other people shouldn't be working from home.

Quote...Speaking to the Daily Mail the prime minister said he believed technology such as Zoom and Microsoft Teams was being used as 'an excuse for people to stay at home'.

'My experience of working from home is you spend an awful lot of time making another cup of coffee and then, you know, getting up, walking very slowly to the fridge, hacking off a small piece of cheese, then walking very slowly back to your laptop and then forgetting what it was you're doing,' Mr Johnson said.

'We need to get back into the habit of getting into the office.

'There will be lots of people who disagree with me, but I believe people are more productive, more energetic, more full of ideas, when they are surrounded by other people,' he said...

If Johnson was working like that when he was working from home as PM it's another reason for him to resign.

This has been reported in the Metro with the fawning headline "Boris wants people back in offices and not at home 'raiding the fridge'". The comments below the article are all disagreeing with Johnson, which is good.

idunnosomename

No way this tubby cunt is "hacking off a small piece of cheese". He's biting into it like an apple

Fambo Number Mive

It's quite concerning that the person running the country is happy to portray himself having the memory of a goldfish, the work ethic of Ignatius Jacques Reilly and the self-discipline of Micky Pearce.

frajer

'My experience of working from home is you spend an awful lot of time snorting Russian cocaine and then, you know, getting up, staggering to the fridge, guzzling oysters with white truffle oil, then oozing back to your laptop and then forgetting which porn site it was you were even wanking over,' Mr Johnson said. 'But when you write that up make it whatever paupers eat. A block of that yellow stuff. I want to say chudge?'

olliebean

Quote from: greencalx on May 14, 2022, 08:28:51 AMHiring someone in-house to do a job = waste.
Outsourcing to an outfit that takes a cut for shareholders = not waste.

"Ah but it's cheaper overall" they say. If it is, that's usually because standards have massively lowered.

Perhaps the market could decide MP salaries?

Remember, that's "Outsourcing to an outfit that takes a cut for shareholders, and is also utterly incapable of doing the job efficiently or effectively because their only qualification is having given money to the Tory party."

Fambo Number Mive

QuoteA government minister has suggested that people struggling with the cost of living could take on more hours or move to a better-paid job.

Rachel Maclean, the safeguarding minister, told Sky News' Kay Burley that those were some of the ways households could "protect themselves" as prices soar.

As if people who are able to take on more hours haven't already though of this. As if people who have the experience for better paid jobs arent already looking for them.

They are happy to demonstrate they think the public are stupid.

What advice will we see next?

"Do not store pound coins under your foreskin. Shops may not want to accept them if they smell of your knob and are covered in smegma."

"Consider not buying lots of shirts just so you can tear them open to reveal a Superman costume. You may enjoy pretending to be Superman but consider getting some kind of velcro shirt."

"Consider making friends with a Tory MP in order to ensure your firm gets better access to government contracts."

Blumf


frajer

"Things are costing more money, so might we recommend you make more money.



Have you tried that?"

PRICKS.

TrenterPercenter

Have they suggested living an idyllic hard-working life in a van yet?

Zero Gravitas

Quote from: Fambo Number Mive on May 16, 2022, 04:20:20 PM"Do not store pound coins under your foreskin. Shops may not want to accept them if they smell of your knob and are covered in smegma."

They've no choice, legal tender up to an unlimited amount, perhaps in Scotland they're free to quibble but not here!

Fambo Number Mive

Jacob Rees Mogg leading the way in encouraging people to get back in the office with his lack of a computer on his desk:

Quote@christopherhope
No computer clogs up ⁦
@Jacob_Rees_Mogg
⁩'s neat desk in Whitehall. Just a carriage clock, 'in' and 'out' trays, some writing paper and a box of Crème Eggs. Old paintings on the wall. This is office life as it should be!


frajer

Smashes the creme eggs onto the writing paper, times how long it takes and then has a wank over an old painting.

*Rule Britannia plays*

Fambo Number Mive

QuotePolice have closed their investigation into breaches of Covid rules in and around Downing Street, with further fines issued.

The Met said the inquiry, which began in January, had resulted in a total of 126 people being fined for events across eight different dates...

The ending of the police inquiry paves the way for the publication of the full report by senior civil servant Sue Gray into lockdown gatherings.

The BBC understands that the Cabinet Office hopes the report will come out within the next couple of weeks.

jobotic


idunnosomename

Centrist disappointment when Sue Gray report is just variations on "hope he pulls through" for 500 pages

TrenterPercenter

fuck centrists this is a stitch up and an insult to everyone.  People need to focus on getting rid of this government it is in centrists, leftwingers and anyone else possessed of any decency's interest to get rid of this government.

jobotic

Yeah the corrupt links between the police and the Tory party aren't really centrist issues.

Fambo Number Mive



Paul Calf


TrenterPercenter

Incredible.  Seriously incredible.  A day of a few people being angry on the radio and then that will be it "move on".  Seems to suit lots of people in fact it will be Labours fault some how for ever bringing it up, it's great now the leader of the opposition can be attacked in parliament for being under police investigation.  Really great.

bgmnts

Quote from: TrenterPercenter on May 19, 2022, 01:47:53 PMfuck centrists this is a stitch up and an insult to everyone.  People need to focus on getting rid of this government it is in centrists, leftwingers and anyone else possessed of any decency's interest to get rid of this government.

I don't see the motivation for a centrist to depose this government to be honest.

Famous Mortimer

It's nice that we're all learning that rules governing people in power are exactly as useful as the people in power want them to be.

TrenterPercenter

Quote from: bgmnts on May 19, 2022, 04:55:52 PMI don't see the motivation for a centrist to depose this government to be honest.

Yes but that says more about you than them.  Of course centrists will want the end of this government they didn't like Corbyn, that doesn't mean they like Johnson.  They, like you don't think Starmer can win, didn't think Corbyn would win, they weren't aligned with Corbyn, had some clashes with Corbynites, got the hump and then idiotically ended up just doing exactly what the Tories wanted of them and regurgitated and added to propaganda taking votes away from an alternate to the Tories.  These fuckwits in many cases still voted for Corbyn but couldn't help themselves but add to noise that just aided the Tories.  They were more focused on kicking lumps out of people that are closer to them politically and venting their anger than getting rid of the Tories.  It's an idiotic thing to do that people keep doing again, again and again then asking why everything is so shit.

Is it really more preferable to be able to go "I was right about centrists" than getting rid of a government behaving like they are.  What do they need to do to get people back to their senses? centrists, greens, libs, left-wingers even some people that were tory wets you need all of them together to get rid of this shitshow so the sooner everyone gets on with that job (because it is the only way regardless of who is leading the Labour Party) the better.

Blinder Data

it's incredible that he won't get any more fines! the public deserve to know how the met have decided that.

there's still the sue gray report and parliamentary inquiry to conclude. Tory MPs aren't happy with him, they just don't know who to replace him with. it feels a bit like Gordon Brown's last couple of years as PM. maybe they'll be pushed into action, if not he's talking the Tory party down with him.

jobotic

I don't think a centrist problem with Corbyn was that they thought he COULDN'T win. They would have expended a lot less energy making sure he wouldn't win had that been the case.

Out of Corbyn and Johnson they picked Johnson. And some admit that.

TrenterPercenter

Quote from: jobotic on May 19, 2022, 07:06:58 PMI don't think a centrist problem with Corbyn was that they thought he COULDN'T win. They would have expended a lot less energy making sure he wouldn't win had that been the case.

Out of Corbyn and Johnson they picked Johnson. And some admit that.

Not all of them even Arch-centrist James O'Brien voted Corbyn of course some of them abstained or whatever, but sure they could be argued to have picked Johnson by default........which is exactly what some people on the left are doing now.

This is the problem, it can be there turn again next time, and on and on....


TrenterPercenter

Quote from: Blinder Data on May 19, 2022, 06:36:57 PMit's incredible that he won't get any more fines! the public deserve to know how the met have decided that.

there's still the sue gray report and parliamentary inquiry to conclude. Tory MPs aren't happy with him, they just don't know who to replace him with. it feels a bit like Gordon Brown's last couple of years as PM. maybe they'll be pushed into action, if not he's talking the Tory party down with him.

Nah not Gordon Brown, he didn't have any friends in the press the Tories can spin this, they'll win the next election, reset and tell everyone they've changed, people should know this by now.  It's all divide and conquer they will find something, some group, that is why it is imperative everyone gets their heads screwed on asap and nukes this shitfest from space at the first possible opportunity.

bgmnts

Quote from: TrenterPercenter on May 19, 2022, 05:18:11 PMYes but that says more about you than them.  Of course centrists will want the end of this government they didn't like Corbyn, that doesn't mean they like Johnson.  They, like you don't think Starmer can win, didn't think Corbyn would win.

Well for one, I think Starmer can technically 'win' because the tories are finding ot hard to get worse and worse but centrism and right wing always align. History shows us this.

The fact is they had the choice of Johnson and Corbyn (i.e right wing and left wing) and yet again they chose right wing.

Change will only come from extreme measures. This milquetoast approach wont do fuck all I'm sorry.

Video Game Fan 2000

Centrists didn't like Corbyn because if you peek under the aesthetics, the fact is they don't much care for redistributive or uplifting economic policy. They want a social justice based liberal/socdem party based on diversity and inclusivity across social strata, not a radical shake-up to try and destratify UK society. They dream of a culture of fairness rather than an equal and just world. Some of the older Good People remember when social mobility was a thing and they don't like that memory much. It's boring talk anyway, what's on Netflix.

The more precarious the middle class becomes, the less they like the idea of being around the poor. They didn't want Corbyn to win, they don't like those kind of ideas to be in circulation much at all. The educated good people look a lot less educated and good when there is something like Corbyn or Sanders in the offing. The fact that noble political movements are always highly flawed turns middle class scolds and bores into J B Priestly characters in double quick time.