Comedy lines that just tickle the shit out of you Mk.II

[Ferris]

Kramer and Frank Costanza talking about why the latter will never cook again.

"It was war: it was a crazy time for everyone."

Something about the earnest delivery of an insane line always makes me laugh.

[gmoney]

Favourite old geezer quote from The Day Today Brass Eye is the small and twatty crime "dressed up like a little city gent and walked into the bank of England shouting fuck the pound".

Agreed.

Every single thing Hugh the old man in The Armando Iannucci Show's is absolute gold. "Cheeseburgers were a penny then!" Written down, not that funny, but the cheerful way he says it gets me every time.

[Pink Gregory]

Louise from Bob's Burgers invoking the idea of 'Tooth Fairy Eve'

[jobotic]

"I'm tired of staring at my own winkle all day"

Jez

[lankyguy95]

'I was going, "Our lot are rubbish? Your Swindon lot are shit."'

Thought of that line this morning for some reason. It's so pathetic, I'm not sure it's even meant to be particularly funny but it tickled me when I remembered it earlier.

[kalowski]

I'm sure I've already posted this but in a regular basis I think of
"Damn these glasses!"
"Yes sir. I damn thee."

[kalowski]

"Damn these glasses!"
"Yes, sir. I damn thee."

Yes! I have posted it before.

[The Mollusk]

Watched the 2021 Ghosts xmas spesh the other day and was reminded how much I fuckin love it when Thomas walks in to see Alison restoring the painting of Lady Button:

"Lucky Fanny, to be touched up by those hands..."

Alison not reacting to it whatsoever makes it all the better as well.

[amateur]

"Where'd you get that anyway?"

"Sent away."

[The Mollusk]

"Where'd you get that anyway?"

"Sent away."

"Sir, how would you like to get higher than you've ever been in your life?"

"Be an astronaut? Sure!"

[petril]

the saaack and saaaaaaacked at 1.40-1.42

[jobotic]

The doctor on the Beef And Dairy Network having appeared on "Is there a Doctor in the House?" and "Doctor, Doctor" on Radio 4 as well as "Embarassing Penises" and "Car Crash Anus" on Channel 4.

[bgmnts]

"Suppose you've heard the rumours around the office?"
"What, about Brian getting bummed?"
"Nooooo... by who?"
"Some binmen."

[neveragain]

"Suppose you've heard the rumours around the office?"
"What, about Brian getting bummed?"
"Nooooo... by who?"
"Some binmen."

Worth pointing out that at the start of that scene we can see loads of bin bags piling up by Geoff's door (because he's scared to put them out.)

[phantom_power]

I was listening to an old Jeeves and Wooster radio series with Richard Briers that is on BBC Sounds at the moment and this line really made me laugh:
"He was so clumsy he was incapable of walking through the great Gobi desert without knocking something over."

[kalowski]

Wodehouse is such a funny writer. There's a great moment where Gussy falls in love and says something like, "I ran up the stairs and there she was, and I could hardly breathe."
"Lot of stairs, were there?" asks Bertie.

[phantom_power]

There was a simple bit in the one I listened to when he answered the phone to his aunt with the phrase "Greetings aging relative" that tickled me for no real reason

[Pink Gregory]

Something that sticks in my head from This Country; Kerry desribing (to camera) as one of her Dad's biker friends as 'the Joker in the pack'

[Fr.Bigley]

Psycho bitches





"Well mother shipton"

"OLD..mother Shipton...*point to back*....Hump"

[Pink Gregory]

Psychobitches unfairly forgotten, I think.  Michelle Gomez as Thatcher should be far more well known.

[ollyboro]

Christmas edition of Gogglebox.

They're all watching Die Hard. We've reached the bit when McClane wedges his gun at the lift's entrance and uses the strap to climb down. One of the lasses viewing then says, "Oh, I thought he was going to fall down the hole....maybe that's why it's called Die Hard.... because he dies on a hard surface."

[bgmnts]

"What's brought this on, killing that man?"

[The Mollusk]

Something that sticks in my head from This Country; Kerry desribing (to camera) as one of her Dad's biker friends as 'the Joker in the pack'

One of the most hilarious scripts of any show I've seen in a while. Two that always jump out for me when I think about it:

Kerry describing one of the vicar's chicken's arse as "a fuckin egg cannon" and opening and closing her fist quickly to demonstrate.

Kurtan talking about Kerry's lack of responsibility: "I let her look after my Tamagotchi once and when I got it back the screen was so full of turds it was like a sea of pixelated shite."

[frajer]

This Country does deliver a great turn of phrase.

Always loved the bleakness of Kerry trading all her future birthday presents for money to spend on a mobile fun fair game when she was a child. And her mum not only obliging, but enforcing this for the rest of Kerry's life.

The phrase "pissed it all up the wall in a few hours on virtual nothingness" pops up a lot in my brain.

[Pink Gregory]

Really hope that Daisy May Cooper does a bit more straightahead comedy one day.  Seems to be heading in more of a comedy drama direction but perhaps that's where the commissioning is

[phantom_power]

Really hope that Daisy May Cooper does a bit more straightahead comedy one day.  Seems to be heading in more of a comedy drama direction but perhaps that's where the commissioning is

She is an odd one. She is great in This Country and seemed like a true individual comic voice but she is incredibly annoying on Never Mind the Buzzcocks and seems like someone who mistakes being loud with being funny

[neveragain]

"What's brought this on, killing that man?"

One of my favourites, from an episode full of cracking lines.

[bgmnts]

One of my favourites, from an episode full of cracking lines.

Honestly never really used to be huge into the lads but watching it now I think they have written some of the most exceptionally funny and rich dark comedy characters ever.

And I think Shearsmith is such a terrific comedy (and dramatic tbf) actor and his anger and nonchalance is amazing.

[Mobius]

One of my favourites, from an episode full of cracking lines.

made me laugh just reading it. can anyone tell me what ep it's from please?

[neveragain]

Psychoville - series one, episode four, 'David and Maureen'.