Tip jar

If you like CaB and wish to support it, you can use PayPal or KoFi. Thank you, and I hope you continue to enjoy the site - Neil.

Buy Me a Coffee at ko-fi.com

Support CaB

Recent

Welcome to Cook'd and Bomb'd. Please login or sign up.

March 28, 2024, 12:21:24 PM

Login with username, password and session length

The Queen has a dose [split topic]

Started by Blue Jam, February 20, 2022, 11:54:42 AM

Previous topic - Next topic

Replies From View

Quote from: Blumf on May 24, 2022, 12:30:19 AMIf she's nowhere to be seen on the big day, someone go down Buckingham Palace's basement and check she isn't hiding in a matchbox and fighting spiders.

Poor deluded woman would think she's crossed over into a Narnia-style realm.  Sorry ma'am you have merely gorn shrunken.

Replies From View


Blue Jam

Sacking off the gee-gees to meet Harry and EVIL MEGHAN and the great-grandkids? She must be ill:

https://www.mirror.co.uk/news/uk-news/queen-to-skip-derby-can-27097780

greencalx


Cold Meat Platter

It needs a new host organism. I'd advise them to exercise caution and protect the back of their necks.

Fambo Number Mive

I have a question about the Queen and the media. I find it somewhat weird that royalists who read the tabloids dont seem to wonder "I wonder how the Queen feels about the paper I read constantly having a go at her grandson".

I mean however annoyed she is with Harry, surely she would regard any rift as family business and shit stirring.

Or if she was really annoyed would someone have had a quiet word in the ears of newspaper owners?

Butchers Blind

Quote from: Fambo Number Mive on May 31, 2022, 10:24:13 PMI have a question about the Queen and the media. I find it somewhat weird that royalists who read the tabloids dont seem to wonder "I wonder how the Queen feels about the paper I read constantly having a go at her grandson".

I mean however annoyed she is with Harry, surely she would regard any rift as family business and shit stirring.

Or if she was really annoyed would someone have had a quiet word in the ears of newspaper owners?

It's all good for business. Positive or negative it keeps them on the front page and in the public consciousness.

Sebastian Cobb

I get the impression they mostly pick their battles with people who are thorns in the side of the royal family, or at least it's semi-sanctioned by the buckingham PR cartel.

touchingcloth

Quote from: Fambo Number Mive on May 31, 2022, 10:24:13 PMI have a question about the Queen and the media. I find it somewhat weird that royalists who read the tabloids dont seem to wonder "I wonder how the Queen feels about the paper I read constantly having a go at her grandson".

I mean however annoyed she is with Harry, surely she would regard any rift as family business and shit stirring.

Or if she was really annoyed would someone have had a quiet word in the ears of newspaper owners?

The stories like that get crossed out by her butler at the same time as he irons her paper.

idunnosomename

The Queen is barely literate and only looks at the Racing Post

Blue Jam

Quote from: touchingcloth on May 31, 2022, 10:57:20 PMThe stories like that get crossed out by her butler at the same time as he irons her paper.

Reckon her staff are like Una Stubbs' family when they used to try and hide stories about the glass coffee table rumour from her?

touchingcloth

Quote from: Blue Jam on June 01, 2022, 10:51:36 AMReckon her staff are like Una Stubbs' family when they used to try and hide stories about the glass coffee table rumour from her?

Are you suggesting the queen SHITS on glass while Phil lies underneath WANKING or something? The queen is far too sophisticated to go around SHITTING on things - that's the kind of behaviour only a child would engage in, assuming Andrew had paid them enough.

TrenterPercenter

Quote from: Blue Jam on May 31, 2022, 12:05:38 AMSacking off the gee-gees to meet Harry and EVIL MEGHAN and the great-grandkids? She must be ill:

https://www.mirror.co.uk/news/uk-news/queen-to-skip-derby-can-27097780

Wait a minute the spawn is called "Lilibet", as a reworking of Elizabeth.  Hmmmm well good I suppose, keeps me remembering that Harry and Meghan despite their usefulness to republicans are still bell ends.

Blue Jam

Wills and Kate give their daughter the middle name "Diana" and it's a beautiful and touching tribute. Bants and Syoots go for "Lilibet" and it's disrespectful and EVIL.

I love seeing the comments claiming Meghan is evil for trying to upstage the CoD with Lil' Lilibet's birthday party. Shame on Syoots for having it during the Jubilee weekend instead of, y'know, on some other date that isn't her actual birthday. From those who acknowledge that a birthday do is supposed to take place on a person's birthday, I've seen claims that Syoots planned her pregnancy so she'd give birth exactly one year before the Jubilee... FFS, people are mental.

Love this too:

https://www.newsweek.com/meghan-set-first-appearance-alongside-disgraced-andrew-since-quitting-1711354

QuoteMeghan Markle is expected to appear at the same Platinum Jubilee event as Prince Andrew—following her past comments in support of the Me Too movement.

Er, I assume Kate Middleton will also be there despite appearing at the vigil for Sarah Everard? Along with dozens of other royals? And if appearing alongside Andrew is at odds with MeToo, isn't that a tacit admission that Newsweek believes he's guilty? Surely the real outrage is that Andrew was invited in the first place (and presumably not by Meghan)?

Blumf

The alternative headline being "Uppity Meghan Snubs Queen's Platinum Jubilee event!!"

Blue Jam

More skiving: the CoD has already decided that her "episodic" mobility issues will definitely flare up before the Commonwealth Games opening ceremony. It's six weeks away but she just knows:

https://www.mirror.co.uk/news/uk-news/frail-queen-pulls-out-iconic-27183006

Ol' Gouty Hands must be getting well pissed off now. Sick of this never-ending dress rehearsal.

Alberon

Clear sign things are much more serious than the palace will let on. I expect it was all she could manage to make the few appearances she did in the jubilee. The Queen Mother lived five years longer than her current age, but IIRC was in far better shape at 96.

Blue Jam

They're not even trotting out the "light duties" line anymore, it must be serious.

Paul Calf

Charles has been edging for at least 25 years. His balls must be royal blue.

Ferris

Quote from: Blue Jam on June 10, 2022, 09:43:10 AMThey're not even trotting out the "light duties" line anymore, it must be serious.

Suspect she's on a life-glug 24/7, they overclocked it to wheel her onto the balcony but it's taken its toll.

TrenterPercenter

#801
You know I'm wondering whether she is suffering with dementia rather than the mobility issues.  She could use a wheelchair couldn't she and other than the deepfake Paddington thing has she really been publicly speaking?  Would explain her sense of humour also.

Video Game Fan 2000


JamesTC

Gasoline Alley 2

Starring Devon Sawa, The Queen and Luke Wilson.

wrec

Missed opportunity not to put her on a mini hoverboat thing like the Mekon.

Video Game Fan 2000

hold it up with a selfie stick and everyone has to pretend its actually hovering

have a little choir of people behind going BrrrRrrRrr to make it seem real. the monarchy can have a positive effect on unemployment

Blue Jam


TrenterPercenter


Video Game Fan 2000

wait that's not Rishi Sunak?

i thought this was the tory leadership thread

Ferris

They all blend into one, someone will be along to talk about keir starmer in a minute.

Back on topic - that strained rictus "troll face" grin slays me every time. It's so forced, you know she's absolutely detesting whatever event she's at. Superb.