What have your teachers done (apart from noncing)

[monkfromhavana]

It was practically impossible to check these things in the 80s but you can now. And it turns out his story was partially true. He was on the books at Leeds in the late 60s, made a couple of appearances in friendlies but instead of getting injured he was farmed out to Shrewsbury, played a few times for them and then played non-league football and then in America for a couple of seasons.

Maurice Parkin?

[Fr.Bigley]

That takes the shine away from casually calling out the teachers as dirty shits.

[Video Game Fan 2000]

The most famous thing what one of my teachers did was get exploded over Lockerbie.

Deservedly so because this didn't happen in 1988 and he wasn't on a plane at the time?

[Fishfinger]

Pretty sure my physics teacher - along with his wife - acted in a car advert. Might've been KwikFit or something. They were blond and he had a goofy bit that he could do. Bumped into him in a hotel breakfast buffet area years later and I decided not to investigate. He also had one of those stupid surnames.

[Jockice]

Maurice Parkin?

Bloody hell, how did you know that?

[Mr Eggs]

Gill Burns. P.E. and England rugby union captain (On the left)

[monkfromhavana]

Bloody hell, how did you know that?

I used to write a fair bit about the NASL for blogs and such many moons ago, so had a good idea of where to look.

[Jockice]

I used to write a fair bit about the NASL for blogs and such many moons ago, so had a good idea of where to look.

I am genuinely astonished. He used to run a vacuum cleaner shop a few doors away from the pub (the Porter Cottage for anyone with Sheffield connections) so he was in there practically every time I was. He had a twin brother too who also played for a few non-league teams.

[MigraineBoy]

I can't help but feel, reading this, that the teachers at my school were boringly normal. It was a source of excitement that our PE teacher had been on Fifteen to One ten years earlier, that's how little we had.

I can beat that - my history teacher Mal Collier was the champion of the second series of Fifteen to One in 1989,  he topped the finals board  in series 3  and went on to be Champion of Champions in 1997.  He used to slag it off saying the harder the quiz the less you won.  All that knowledge and it got him a big glass plate.

[shiftwork2]

That's bollocks.  321 was incomprehensible and they gave away caravans.

[badaids]

Deservedly so because this didn't happen in 1988 and he wasn't on a plane at the time?

Well she definitely was on the aircraft, well until it disintegrated.

[Sebastian Cobb]

I don't know if any of our teachers had been on game shows on tv but a couple of pupils a few years above got to go on Fun House.

There was a rumour that Mrs 'Hardcore' Halfpenny was found to have appeared in a copy of Readers Wives but it was perpetually someone 'a few years above' (and it was still that when a friend's younger brother attended the school) who found it in their brothers collection.

[badaids]

I'm putting it out there that the following:

Mr Giles:  J'lober.

Mr Leary:  Cuckold.

Mr Schofield:  Man on man watersports.

Mr Willoughby:  Pantie sniffer.

Mr Gough:  Bludgeoned 4 women to death with a hammer in 1987.

Mr Gilbert:  Member of Opus Dei, obsessed with trying to bum himself.

Mrs Catherall:  Just delighted in being an utter cunt, probably dead now.

Mrs Kilsby.  Physically assaulted me while pissed.  Should have grassed her up.

[Povidone]

One of the English teachers at my school was on Who Wants To Be A Millionaire, he used one of the physics teachers as his phone a fried: cunt was useless, to this day he is probably still taunted with the immortal words 'whooping cough' (it wasn't whooping cough)

[The Culture Bunker]

One of my RE teachers wound up in local politics - served as Mayor of Whitehaven, was a Tory Councillor but I believe he got binned off the other week. Which is good, as he was a bit of an arse to my mam once.

Only other notable former school teacher story was my second year teacher getting nicked for minor firearm offences. A sad story, as it seems he'd been mixing anxiety medication with alcohol. Certainly, I know a fair few teachers back then who were partial to a morning "eye-opener" and a lunch-time top up.

Mentioned before, but forum favourite Brendan O'Neil taught a module on my Journalism course some 20 odd years ago, so I can take pride in thinking he was a bit of a div long before most of you had ever heard of him.