Snooker 2019

[Norton Canes]

Why did the fireplace salesman's job fall through? His hearth wasn't in it

[poo]

Hi fake snooker fan here. Love the world champs - not bothered about the rest of it. Looking forward to seeing the story unfold. Hoping for a bald win.

[poo]

And glad Ronnie's out. Scummy weasel cunt.

[Blue Jam]

I admire Zhou's suit. Good to see someone being flamboyant in the absense of Marco Fu.

[Shoulders?-Stomach!]

Bingham's playing gash.

Loving battle of the baldest shittest champions. Snooker as it was meant to be.

Hopefully one will follow through soon.

[Shoulders?-Stomach!]

Haha this red button action is terrifically awful from the two bulbous trolls Dott and Bingham. Tweedlebald.

[imitationleather]

I admire Zhou's suit. Good to see someone being flamboyant in the absense of Marco Fu.

I want him to stay in the competition purely to see how he tops his current attire.

[sevendaughters]

Heard someone was having a go at Graeme Dott and came here to kick their heads off. 3 time world finalist, you do NOT get that mileage out of being shit. No Joe Johnson am he.

[Blue Jam]

How has Mark Allen managed to end up looking this much like Shaun Ryder without using serious quantities of drugs?

[Puce Moment]

How has Mark Allen managed to end up looking this much like Shaun Ryder without using serious quantities of drugs?

I would imagine that beer, fags and rissoles are a drug to that roly poly gnome.

This year's competition is really excelling - incredible to see O'Sullivan get knocked out like that. Even this Bingham/Dott match is starting to get interesting!

[Lost Oliver]

Come on Dott!

Used to loathe him until I realised he's probably depressed.

[Blue Jam]

Zhou leading Allen 4 frames to nil now. It's the children's table today.

I'm also glad Ronnie's out- Puce Moment, after replying to your great post earlier about the whole Ronnie at the Crucible experience, the last few days have just reminded me that I much prefer watching the young guns to the Class of '92, and as I love an underdog I generally find myself rooting for Ronnie's opponents anyway. I also loathe the way the pundits blather on about him as if he is snooker itself, it'd be good to have the spotlight on some new talent this year.

I'm right behind Cahill now, and glad I'll be seeing him and not Ronnie play Maguire when I head to the Crucible on Saturday. I'm also glad I didn't chicken out of putting that fiver on him...

[Uncle TechTip]

Heard someone was having a go at Graeme Dott and came here to kick their heads off. 3 time world finalist, you do NOT get that mileage out of being shit. No Joe Johnson am he.

Yeah but he looks like a wee bollock so it's fair game.

[Lost Oliver]

I've just put 2 quid on Dott to come back. What an error. Okay it's only two quid but it's two quid.

[sevendaughters]

Yeah but he looks like a wee bollock so it's fair game.

everything about him on paper - looks like a ned in a suit, Rangers fan, no personality - is not for me, but he thrills me with his commitment to ruthless psychological warfare.

[sevendaughters]

9-7 MY FUCKING GOD BINGHAM LOSES THE FRAME ON THE THREE MISSES RULE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1 DOTT IS DANCING AROUND THE CRUCIBLE

[kidney]

Can't quite decide who is playing worse between the two rotund fellas, Bingham and Allen

[imitationleather]

Dott's shirt looks far too big for him. It really adds to his overwhelming aura of dishevelment and despair.

[Flouncer]

Fucking hell... I can't believe he's come back from 8-1 to take it to a decider. That's staggering! I've missed it because I was watching (spam).

[imitationleather]

Fucking hell... I can't believe he's come back from 8-1 to take it to a decider. That's staggering! I've missed it because I was watching (spam).

I've also been missing it. That's nuts.

[sevendaughters]

absolutely amazing, I've been live-tweeting it and feel like I've willed it into happening

[pigamus]

Heard someone was having a go at Graeme Dott and came here to kick their heads off. 3 time world finalist, you do NOT get that mileage out of being shit. No Joe Johnson am he.

Nor is Joe Johnson, really, being as he outplayed Steve Davis in his prime and then made the final again the very next year.

[Flouncer]

Come on Dotty! Shine on you scrotey diamond.

[sevendaughters]

Nor is Joe Johnson, really, being as he outplayed Steve Davis in his prime and then made the final again the very next year.

purple patch, Dotty's been knocking them down for 2 decades now!

[imitationleather]

I enjoyed Dott working the rest and a ten foot cue.

[Shoulders?-Stomach!]

Loving these bald cunts going balls deep into the decider.

[Rolf Lundgren]

Come on Dott! I will never criticise him for having Simply The Best as his walk-on music if he wins this.

[Shoulders?-Stomach!]

Will one of them Shart?

[Shoulders?-Stomach!]

Fuck you Hendry and your HE'S GONE MATE GONE BINGHAM IS GONE NOTHING LEFT bullshit narrative shaping non-commentary.

[Shoulders?-Stomach!]

Bing Junhui lives to shart another day