Products you would happily advertise

[Shoulders?-Stomach!]

Assuming of course that the product is made reasonably ethically and all that, do you have any objects or foods or services you would be happy to whore yourself out for...?

I know a few of you will choose Encona Hot Pepper Sauce already, so let's get that out of the way. My first object will be a less spicy and more flavourful condiment:

Cholula Original Hot Sauce


More bearable for my weak stomach, a lovely tang rather than burn, and an amazing warming smell- and the bottle is designed by a genius, as the sauce dribbles out in just the right quantity, meaning you never have too much or too little of it. Someone here will soon report it is made in a plague pit by enslaved gypsy chimps who work for flawed sapphire dust and crack, and if so, I will withdraw my offer of employment.

I'm not sure how I'd advertise it exactly, probably in a similar way to John Lydon- I buy it cos oi fink its the best.

[monkfromhavana]

I'd happily endorse any of the Encona range, not just the hot pepper sauce.

To be honest though, i'd happily sellout and flog anything as long as the pay was good. Nerve gas, land mines, crack, unsanitary water..

[Johnny Townmouse]

Compare the Market

&

Alpro Low-Fat Soy Milk

&

Engevita Yeast Flakes

[George Oscar Bluth II]

Jaegermeister

Kwik-Fit (seriously, every time I've ever used them they've been excellent and cheap.)

[Vodka Margarine]

Salt.

"It's heart-stoppingly versatile!"

[garbed_attic]

The 1990s video-boardgame "Atmosfear".

[Lazy Daisy]

Marlboro Gold
Fab ice lollies
Yazoo chocolate milkshakes
La Senza

[mook]

merlot

cider

hooky tax dodging baccy

perry

purdey shot guns

dunlop wellies

tunnocks caramel wafers

barbour

carrs water biscuits

and crocs.

[Lazy Daisy]

tunnocks caramel wafers

carrs water biscuits

Filling looseners & tongue glue


http://stopshop.be/e/adinkerke/

[Cerys]

Vanish Carpet Mousse (got a lot of black emulsion paint out of a pale green Axminster - my landlord never had to know).

[Ginyard]

Tampons

[Lazy Daisy]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zPUNO8LCHrs

This WILL change your life.

[doppelkorn]

Swarfega

Cream cakes. Remember when they used to advertise cream cakes that were good.

[Captain Crunch]

Mad Fish boots (I always thought they'd be shit but they're not, that's the line).

[TrenterPercenter]

I'm not sure how I'd advertise it exactly, probably in a similar way to John Lydon- I buy it cos oi fink its the best.

How about with the jingle 'My name is Cholula, my first rule of thumb, I say don't go to spicy, care for your rec-tum'',  then perhaps a close-up of an immaculately un-inflamed anus hole just to get the taste buds tingling.

[Jerzy Bondov]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zPUNO8LCHrs

This WILL change your life.

FUCKING YES

[Lyfjaberg]

I would change my name to Jeremy Meremy Leremy in order to BE JML.

[Goldentony]

The shield from Thundercats that fired a coconut at a time

[thenoise]

Marmite, because I eat it every day and I bloody love it.

[SetToStun]

barbour

Jeez, grandad - it's all about Beretta now; Barbour is so last-year.com

I'd advertise Fentimans soft drinks, any single malt but preferably an Islay, my local butcher, my local fishmonger, Louis Tussaud's (Gt. Yarmouth) and Marmite.

Wine, cider, Marlboro Lights and The Crunchy Chicken I'd do for freebies instead of cash, of course.

[Mildly Diverting]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zPUNO8LCHrs

This WILL change your life.

I am desiring this.

[SteveDave]

I'd advertise absolutely anything if it meant I didn't have to work where I'm working now.

Apparently a song of mine *might* be being used on an online advert for Vogue glasses in Italy. I can feel my pockets tingling already.

[mook]

Jeez, grandad - it's all about Beretta now; Barbour is so last-year.com

you essex ponce.

[biggytitbo]

Cooper's Creosote. I do it for nowt.

[SetToStun]

you essex ponce.

You simpering Sussex dandy; you preening jackanape; you prancing gimcrack.

But seriously, Beretta doesn't have the cuff-wicking fault that most Barbours do. So there.

[mook]

that's part of the charm of them. they show their wear like their owners, with good grace and more than a sense of entitlement.

[SetToStun]

And wet arms, of course.

[mook]

i've been wearing since them i was a kid, never had one fail. you've not been putting them on upside down have you?

[SetToStun]

To be fair, the problem does seem to mainly affect shooters - once water gets in the inside of the cuff, it wicks all the way up.

[mook]

^ i never had that problem on a shoot - are they standing there arms and arms aloft in the pouring rain? they must have wrists like reeds.