Sitcoms where a character is replaced by an ED-209

[Fambo Number Mive]

Manwairing: Now men, let's start with some weapons drill. Private Pike, take your rifle and advance towards Private ED-209 here.

(The ED-209 is wearing a massive camoflage beret)

Private ED-209: PUT DOWN YOUR WEAPON, YOU HAVE TWENTY SECONDS TO COMPLY

Mainwairing: I think you'd better do what he says, you stupid boy.

(Pike drops the rifle)

Private ED-209: PUT DOWN YOUR WEAPON, YOU HAVE TEN SECONDS TO COMPLY

Wilson: I say, my dear fellow, Frank's dropped his weapon.

(Pike runs around the church hall while Jones shouts Don't Panic!)

(The ED-209 opens fire and turns Pike into a pile of blood and flesh).

Godfrey: Oh dear, shall I try and bandage some of the guts?

Mainwairing: Fuck it. Nice shooting, Private ED-209. Somebody get a mop.

Wilson: I'm just off to ring Mavis...Mrs Pike sir, have her identify the remnants.

Mainwairing: Ok Wilson. Hurry up, because Jones looks like he's planning to sell some of the remnants as "sausages"

Jones: Don't panic! Half priced sausages, ignore that it tastes like chicken! Don't panic! Half priced sausages, ignore that it tastes like chicken!

[ImmaculateClump]

Where's me pooding! I want me poooooding!
You have 20 seconds to comply with poooding request!

[idunnosomename]

PLAY IT NICE AND COOL SON KNOW WHAT I MEAN

*tumbles down the stairs*

[Glebe]

ALBERT STEPTOE: Can we go to Bognor ED-209?

ED-209: You have twenty seconds to comply.

[Glebe]

FLETCHER: Another wonderful day confined to a cell with a Brummagem upstart!

ED-209: DROP YOUR WEAPON YOU HAVE ETC.

[Replies From View]

ED-209:  YOU HAVE TWENTY SECONDS TO STOP SHITTING IN MY BERET

[Glebe]

ED-209: DROP YOUR WEAPON YOU HAVE TWENTY SECONDS TO COMPLY.

NORA BATTY: Oh give ovah it's only a sweeping brush!

[Norton Canes]

ED-209: You are in direct violation of Penal Code 1.13, Section 9

Fletcher: I know, you nerk, that's why I'm here in the nick

ED-209: Fairs

[frajer]

ED-209: Drop-your-weapon-you-have-20-seconds-to-comply.

CHANDLER: Could I BE any more shitting my pants?

JOEY: How YOU complyin?

PHOEBE: Kill them Ed kill them all, I'll bury the bodies.

[Glebe]

ED-209: YOU HAVE TWENTY SECONDS TO COMPLY.

SEINFELD: Is this some kind of joke?

AUDIENCE: Ahahahah!!

[Replies From View]

what's the deal with ed-209s

[Hex Triplet]

TED-209: YOU SEE SPIKE THE SECRET TO GOOD COMEDY

*machine guns entire audience into ribbons*

TED-209: IS TIMING.

*gun turrets whirr*

[Elderly Sumo Prophecy]

RODDERS



DELBOY?

[Replies From View]

That's very confusing

[Elderly Sumo Prophecy]

Delboy is a robot, he shoots Rodders, Boycie does a laugh.

[Hex Triplet]

ED-209: HELGA I VISH TO ENTER ZIS FRENCH CAFE UND CONSUME A GERMAN SAUSAGE.

HELGA: But Herr 209, General von Klinkerhoffen gave strict instructions-

ED-209: YOU HAVE ZWANZIG SEKUNDEN TO COMPLY WITH MEINE DEMANDS.


OFFICER ROBOCRABTREE: Dod or alave, you're cumming with moo.

[frajer]

ED-209: I-only-shot-him-because-I-am-programmed-to-shoot. OH-IS-THAT-A-CRIME-TO-KILL-CRIMINALS-NOW?

*Curb theme plays*

[Glebe]

ED-209: PUT DOWN YOUR WEAPON YOU HAVE TWENTY SECONDS TO COMPLY.

FRAZIER: You obviously have some very deep issues caller.

AUDIENCE: Heh!

[The Dog]

Ed 209: Oooh Betty

[The Dog]

Frazier: Something boring
The other one from Frazier: Something stupid
Next one from Frazier: Something boring and stupid.
Ed 209: Machine Guns everyone.
Human Race: Well done ed209, well done.

[Norton Canes]

He says we've got twenty seconds to comply

[Norton Canes]

That one was father Dougal 

[Norton Canes]

ED-209: You have twenty seconds to comply
Basil: I've got twenty seconds to comply, have I? Oh that's great, that's absolutely marvellous. And would you like me to comply over here? Or shall I comply over here? Or would you just like me to stay where I am and comply?

[DangledTeeth]

Major: Vermin! A rat!

Basil: Yes, well, forgive and forget, Major. We don't have a shotgun license.

ED-209: PUT DOWN YOUR WEAPON!! YOU HAVE TWENTY SECONDS TO COMPLY!!

Major turns to face ED-209 which has a moose head ornament affixed to its head

Major: Ah-bwuh-I-I-I-I'm fine, thank you.

ED-209 trips over a table and wriggles its legs

Mr Hamilton: Satisfied customers, huh? *Yanks Basil's tie* Hotdog!

[Norton Canes]

Talk about setting a trend

[Norton Canes]

Don't worry. Mine was actually Michael Barrymore pretending to be Basil Fawlty

[DangledTeeth]

Rodney: You were born arahnd 'ere, weren'tcha?.

Albert: Yah. Tabaccah Raoad. My 'ouse used to be... sahmewhere arahnd 'ere.

Del: What's this all about then, eh? Running away from home at your age?!

Albert: A lo'a things bin gaoin' throo my mind la'ely, Del. I didn't knaow if I woz cahmin' or gaoin'. I feel I leh the fam'ly dahn. I leh you two dahn.

Del: Naaoh, don't be so bloody daft.

Rodney: You didn't let anybody down.

Del (quickly muttered): 'e didn't get the fish fingers, mind.

Albert: I needed to be alaone fer a while.

Rodney: Bu' where were ya gonna gao?

Albert: Fuck knows, Rodney. I didn't realoise things 'ad changed sao much. When I woz abah' fifteen I left 'ome and goh a job on a tramp steamer.

Del: So you was a bit of a divvy cunt in them days an' all, were ya?

Rodney: Oi! That line is too early.

Del: Sorry. You can come 'ome......................................... to your family.

Albert: Fenks, sahn. Y'knaow, ships from all over the world would cahme 'ere. Fihwm ov oil. Sun, sahn. Spawkold wiv all diffront cahlers. When I woz a kid I used ta think rainbaows live in the wa'agh.

Del stands in silence alongside Rodney

Albert: There were tahgs nadgin' freigh'ers inta postion. Cranes liftin' aht timber from the woods. Canada from Jamaica. Cafes with sailors from forron lands. Buah the tiyme I woz seven there ten diffront lahngwidges and I coohd swear. There used to be stree's all arahnd 'ere - two-ahp, two-dahn aowziz. Doctor's mangle they called 'em. Ragahmaffins kicking brooms against the wall, and the women used to cahm aht wiv their buhnahnuhs and chased us off.  They were rahf people, but they woz good people. Dyoorin nuh Blitz the laocals wro'e a sign on the roof so tha' the looftwoffah poyluts could read it. Ih read: DEAR ADOLF, PUT DAHN YOUR WEAPON *Poignantly lowers his head* YOU HAVE 20 SECONDS TO COMPLY. Look at wha' they've dahn to it nah.

Del: Yeah... it's terrific, innit.

Rodney: Terrific!?!?

Del: Yeah. Michael Caine. Currant bun. Lovely Jubbly.

[Replies From View]

Delboy is a robot, he shoots Rodders, Boycie does a laugh.

Ah okay.  Rodney changes his clothes between shots but that's fine - worse sins have been committed to celluloid.  Especially on a BBC sitcom budget.

Also the photo of Boycie didn't display when I first saw it, so.

[Fambo Number Mive]

He changes his clothes as he does an all  body shit when he sees Del 209.

Although Del would probably be a cheaper knockoff version. A Del 208.

[Elderly Sumo Prophecy]

See, Fambo gets it. Rodders shites out his entire body in shock and puts a suit and tie on.