Create a T-Shirt slogan for me to wear

[Small Man Big Horse]

Okay, the plan is this - over the next 24 hours I want folks to come up with a phrase, slogan or random selection of words that I will then put on a t-shirt via the lovely folks at http://www.cafepress.co.uk/index.aspx

The rules are as follows:

I promise to wear the said t-shirt in public at least 12 times a year.
Anything that could get me arrested will be disqualified - so no "All politicians are cunts", Biggy.
That applies to swearing as well, but usage of **** is acceptable.
Anything that could get me punched in the face will be disqualified too - so no "I murdered Madeleine McCann" entries please!
At 7pm tomorrow no further entries will be considered - but then there will be a 24 hour voting period, and the one that gets the highest amounts of votes will be the winner.

Now I know it's very tempting to come up with something that will ruin my life, but hey, you don't have to go down that route...

[purlieu]

Dare I suggest I BAMLEM JACK BUAER?

[Shoulders?-Stomach!]

REMF REMF ALL I WANT IS REMF

[mook]

I'm far too fat and old to be wearing a T-shirt.

Does my gut look big in this?

[boxofslice]

"I'm voting Tory. Join me".

[purlieu]

Anything that could get me punched in the face will be disqualified too

[Goldentony]

'Vic, there was pensioners out there enjoying that'

[ThickAndCreamy]

You don't have to be scared of being on your own.
You have to be afraid of being with me.

[mook]

I paint my toenails - HELL YEAH!!!!!

[Goldentony]

'THAT WAS SOME COLD SHIT THROWING MY MAN LEROY OUT THE WINDOW!!"

[biggytitbo]

"My other t-shirt is funnier"

[mook]

Delia WAS RIGHT.

[JPA]

LOSERS    1

WINNERS 0


_{That's right, I just blew your minds.}

[Goldentony]

There's something you may not know about me - I smoke crack.

[wherearethespoons]

My other T-shirt is a Rolls Royce.

[Slaaaaabs]

HOVERCRAFT DENIER

[DocDaneeka]

  Eva Cassidy
1963 - 1996
NEVER FORGET

[phes]

small man big horse gives you MORE FLOUNCE TO THE OUNCE

[Milo]

I promise to wear the said t-shirt in public at least 12 times a year.

That might work. ie, the tshirt says:

I promised to wear this t-shirt in public at least 12 times a year.

[weekender]

"WOMEN HAVE BEARDS TOO"

"A LIMP DOES NOT MAKE ME A PAEDO"

If I was being serious I would go for:

"Talk TO me, not AT me".

[Claude the Racecar Driving Rockstar Super Sleuth]

The word 'Heart' on the sleeve.

[weekender]

Get the fuck out of this thread you clever cunt.

[biggytitbo]

"Batteries not included"

[mook]

You were the lead in my last wet dream.*





*it was 1987 and you were four.

[boxofslice]

"Squirting Denier".

[ziggy starbucks]

[Lookalike Mark Chapman]

**** ****, ****!

[biggytitbo]

Bring back hanging

[rudi]

I'm a Whore

[buntyman]

You could have 'I know, I've got terrible taste in trousers' written in an ugly font in ugly colours and worn with a perfectly normal pair of trousers.