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Cunt of Death Day Jubilation Spectacular

Started by shoulders, May 16, 2022, 02:40:06 PM

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DoesNotFollow

Will be getting together with my partner and some of her family on the bank holiday. She tells me it's more a convenience thing as everyone will have time off work for an overdue family gathering buuttt... I also know they watch the CoD's speech at Christmas and I think probably had a 'do' for the last jubilee. Still it'll be free food, Pepsi Max cherry and dogs to pat.

Looking forward to seeing more terrible tat and displays for the occasion in this thread.

bgmnts

Seeing bunting in a few charity shops and other places. Getting worried now.

Blue Jam

#272
Was thinking of checking out a film on the Sunday of Jubbly Weekend, because the Edinburgh Filmhouse do cheap tickets every Sunday and it'd be nice to get away from all the fawning madness for a couple of hours... OH FOR FUCK'S SAKE:

https://www.filmhousecinema.com/showing/queens-corgi

They'll probably play the national anthem before the start of every film.


Corgis are Welsh, they shouldn't sound like Jack Whitehall.


Blue Jam

I may have to get royally bunted to get through this.

Fambo Number Mive

Bike shop near me has posters thanking the Queen for 70 years of service and offering 20% off bikes.

Video Game Fan 2000

your bike shop thinks the queen is a slut

Blumf

A warning from history:

https://mobile.twitter.com/bbcmtd/status/1529521706158673923
QuoteIn 1977, there was a BBC Nationwide Jubilee Song Contest. It was won by the Singing Butcher and the Coventry Kids, with Let's Celebrate the Royal Jubilee.


Attila

Quote from: bgmnts on May 26, 2022, 12:46:10 PMUsed to be called feudalism back in the day.

Well within your right I say, their shite is just as offensive as what your shite would be to them. Fuck em.

We walked past their playground this afternoon, and it's a demented spider's web of Union Jack bunting, flags, Queenie portrait...and giant cloth posters of dinosaurs.

Blue Jam

Edinburgh seems refreshingly devoid of bunting, only saw my first bit o'bunting just now.

Festooning a Wetherspoons.

Didn't drink there obviously.

Fambo Number Mive

Quote from: Blumf on May 26, 2022, 05:48:44 PMA warning from history:

https://mobile.twitter.com/bbcmtd/status/1529521706158673923

That video is like something out of Scarfolk.

Did the Singing Butcher make all the kids into pies once they had finished the song? A lot of them sounded out of tune.

Blue Jam

"The Singing Butcher" sounds like a horror film.

Kankurette

Quote from: robhug on May 26, 2022, 10:28:52 AMthey fuckin well are and not only that we've had a month of homework about the fuckin jerbillee.

at a low point i wrote in her original saxe coburg or whatever name under a "queen facts" heading on one of the pages of this special book theyve been given. I was told the teacher gave him a stern look when she read it.
Reason Number 583960783729 why I'm glad I'm childfree. 'Sake.

Serious question. Why do you all call the the Queen "Cunt of Death"?

touchingcloth

Quote from: curiousoranges on May 26, 2022, 11:45:35 PMSerious question. Why do you all call the the Queen "Cunt of Death"?

Mateys, he's asked the question. Quick, enact the protocol. London Bridge is open.

canadagoose


canadagoose

Quote from: Blue Jam on May 26, 2022, 06:49:32 PMEdinburgh seems refreshingly devoid of bunting, only saw my first bit o'bunting just now.

Festooning a Wetherspoons.

Didn't drink there obviously.
I've certainly not seen any around here either. I'm planning to go back to see my parents on that weekend, and my parents certainly won't be "celebrating the Queen" or anything.

I think the whole royal street party thing died out in the '60s for a lot of people around here. I asked my parents if there was a street party for the Silver Jubilee in 1977 and they just laughed and said "of course not". If there's anything bigger than a few gazebos in "staunch" peoples' gardens, I'd be very surprised.

Video Game Fan 2000

Quote from: curiousoranges on May 26, 2022, 11:45:35 PMSerious question. Why do you all call the the Queen "Cunt of Death"?

It scans so well with Gene Chandlers Duke of Earl

non capisco

Quote from: Fambo Number Mive on May 26, 2022, 06:57:18 PMThat video is like something out of Scarfolk.

Did the Singing Butcher make all the kids into pies once they had finished the song? A lot of them sounded out of tune.

What they don't tell you is the only other competition entrant was The Wanking Barber with his song 'I Shall Wank For Her Majesty'. I think this ruddy faced child botherer must merely have won by default.

idunnosomename

Quote from: curiousoranges on May 26, 2022, 11:45:35 PMSerious question. Why do you all call the the Queen "Cunt of Death"?
id do a search to try and find the first mention of it here but the new sidebar with this thread is ruining everything

it's just edgelord stuff, but we like to think it's so base and over the top it's clearly ironic i guess. it's no more genuine than the BBC fawning over "light duties", "good spirits" and all that shit

Kankurette

Quote from: curiousoranges on May 26, 2022, 11:45:35 PMSerious question. Why do you all call the the Queen "Cunt of Death"?
Because she has a vagina dentata that ate Phil. That's how he really died.

Pink Gregory

Have an urge to put all posters of Kim Il-Sung in the window

shoulders

Quote from: curiousoranges on May 26, 2022, 11:45:35 PMSerious question. Why do you all call the the Queen "Cunt of Death"?

It's my fault. I came up with it (along with other less successful monikers for the rest of them) and just kept using it until others started.

Butchers Blind



SpiderChrist

The Ely WI went nuts over last weekend and festooned parts of the "city" with embroidered/knitted red white and blue shite.

And Ely Foodbank announced that all their distribution centres would be shut on Thursday and Friday to "enable our volunteers to celebrate the Queen's Jubilee with their families". What kind of fucking sick country are we in where the need to fawn over one of the richest women in the world overrides the needs of some of the poorest?

Kankurette

I can't even joke about that. That's fucking disgusting. Preventing people in need from stocking up on food and household goods because of the queen.

idunnosomename

Are there any paid admin staff at a foodbank? If so they'd have to pay them bank holiday rates.

This whole thing has fucked up a lot of people, literally no one seems to looking forward to it

DrGreggles

Just been asked about people using my driveway again - I less politely declined