That person everyone likes to bitch about

[hpmons]

There's one person at uni (a fresher, M) who seems mind-bogglingly like a real life internet troll, but there's no indication that he doesn't actually believe everything he says...I don't think there's a single person who likes him, because he manages to just make everyone so awkward.  I just can't resist listing his weirdness.

• First, M "flirts" with almost everyone, male or female, straight or gay (I should point out I know him from LGBTQ, among other things).  And I don't mean flirt subtly, but puts his arm around people's shoulders even after their body language has been pretty clear that they don't want anything to do with him.  He has been formally told off at japanese soc as he's made enough people uncomfortable.
• He has a theory that everyone has a "straightener".  This is someone who can "purge" all the gay thoughts from someone, so they can literally forget they were ever gay/bi.  He somehow concluded that one gay girl was his "straightener" and vice versa.  While discussing this, he he saying "Well I've got to give her hope!", while people tried to explain that most people are fine with being gay and don't need the "hope" of being turned straight. (Yeah, he's got issues with being bi...)
• Somehow we once got onto the topic of the word "faggot", and M said it was absolutely fine to call people faggot, while people explained that most people are uncomfortable with it, and one guy (MC), seemed pretty offended that this guy could think that.  When MC's birthday came around, M wrote "happy birthday faggot :P" on his wall.
• He started flirting/staring at the breasts of one girl who he's never flirted with before, and she was a little confused so asked why he was being cosy with her.  He said that he got the impression she'd do it with anyone.
  
• "It's annoying how if a girl hits you, you're not allowed to hit her back"
• He also said that women don't need to be paid as much, because they don't need to buy as many things as men do...Which manages to be sexist to both genders.

Consequently, a lot of people avoid him (apparently some people even think hes a bit rapey), some weirdos want to "help" him, and some people (like me) just find him mildly entertaining[nb]this catergory is mostly the small minority who he doesn't flirt with[/nb] and like to bitch about him while hoping he'll gradually change on his own.

So is there anyone in your circle(s) who is just so odd that everyone likes to bitch about?

[Shoulders?-Stomach!]

I'm really glad no-one like that is in my circle of friends.

My ex-housemate was ideal bitching-fodder, as he managed to be incredibly anti-social as well as rather peculiar. On the disgusting side, a musty never-washed dressing gown that stunk a room out if he was in it for too long, a very odd smell coming from his room, a propensity to let rip farts that on several occasions actually emptied a room full of people while he sat there giggling to himself like a baby. He would do immense food projects, fill the sink with dirty dishes and cooking items and leave it there for days. He wasn't busy either, he would have it in his peripheral vision as he paced up and down the living room for hours, thinking.

On the social side, a tendency to drink heavily to allow him to passive-aggressively shout things in the pub so that offending people could listen. He finds it important to have these sacred cows that he won't allow anyone to besmirch, particularly if they fall superficially into the category of people he regards as beneath him, and when people do say things he disagrees with while drunk, he will bark at them that they need to DIE OF CANCER. One a couple of occasions this was because a person had said they didn't like his local pub very much.

He's very disliked, especially by women- which is funny because he considers himself a feminist and moans repeatedly about our patriachal society, and would find the idea of being disliked by women as being a fundamental personal failing.

He's also been bitched about a lot for getting a girlfriend and seemingly leaving all his beliefs and former life in the dustbin. He now thinks sex is a good thing, dogs are a good thing, children are a good thing. I'm not sure what's next- eventually he might even see marriage as a good thing.

So yes, aggressive, unpredictable, eccentric, disgusting. He still has his own particular charm in the right setting, but nearly everyone he meets has some strong opinion about an aspect of him. Usually negative. Funnily enough, he has his own favourite eccentric that he takes the piss out of.

Ahh, humans.

[Saucer51]

A colleague of mine has been getting problems since he started in our company. He's a harmless nerd with a wife and small child and a penchant for tech stuff. He's not sleazy, not a groper just makes jokes that make one groan rather than laugh. He's not my favourite person but he has thoughts and feelings like anyone else. I think there's a lot of bandwagon jumping going on. One cow even moaned that he was using the department kitchenette for its intended purpose. ie to eat his lunch. "We don't want him in there!" was a whine heard to come from her lips. I really hope things settle down for him.

OP - it's not always an oddball who gets singled out. Sometimes it's a nasty little pecking order with some poor soul being at the bottom of it. But on the info given about your nemesis, he does seem to be rather disagreeable.

[MojoJojo]

He's a fresher? Not really that unusual. A lot of people act like dicks as freshers - they don't know how to behave outside school/family, and no one else knows how they should be behaving, so their inappropriate behaviour doesn't get corrected quickly.

[Little Hoover]

Hmm, I don't know, wouldn't say I knew anyone like that.

[weekender]

"It's annoying how if a girl hits you, you're not allowed to hit her back"

I agree with him on this point.

[Jim Jarmusch]

Collectively we managed to force our weirdo from the class at Uni to leave this week.

One example of his behaviour. We have a private Wordpress that the tutors post assignments and things of interest on and that we can submit inspirational material. This person posted a full on pornographic experimental short film on there that he'd uploaded himself to YouTube as a private non-listed video. Close ups of penetration and oral sex performed on both sexes. When someone else taking the piss asked him in front everyone why he'd choose to share it he almost hyperventilated that none of us could see the artistic value of a doctors and nurses fetish act.

I never felt comfortable around him. He was one of the most awkward people I've ever come across. Condescending asshole, maybe a member of this forum for all I know. :) The last day he came in he sat next to me watching me eat. I'm happy that I go to spoil Dexter for him. He thought I was an idiot and didn't believe it could happen after telling him this season's twist two months ago.

There's going to be no one to talk about from now on.

[MojoJojo]

"It's annoying how if a girl hits you, you're not allowed to hit her back"

I almost brought that up.

He's right it's unfair. But annoying? The social unsuitability of hitting women doesn't come up enough for it to be a annoying for me.

Admittedly, I'm the sort of pussy[nb]shit, bad use of language with feminists about[/nb] who hasn't had the problem of men hitting me since I was about 15, so women hitting me is not something I can associate with. I should probably do more rape.

[Zetetic]

Wait, I thought that the issue with that statement was the idea that you can't hit a woman back. You're all horrible sexists.

[weekender]

You're all horrible sexists.

I'm not, I want to hit women back if they hit me.  It's only fair.

[23 Daves]

Ah, the weirdo at the start of the thread sounds uncannily like an old housemate of a friend of mine.  He also used to start ridiculous arguments, have ludicrous theories about people's sexualities, and hit on everyone irrespective of their gender or sexual orientation, or whether they fancied him or not (and they usually didn't, since he wasn't exactly a looker).  I stayed over the house for a couple of nights - I was fucking desperate for somewhere to kip while I looked for another place to live, I might add - and on two occasions he accidentally entered the lounge where I was sleeping and accidentally-on-purpose fell on top of me.  I had to make it clear I wasn't interested, and let's just say that my ambition to find a half-decent place to live was given something of a boost.  It's also the only time in my life where somebody has apparently fancied me and I've been creeped out by it rather than flattered. 

These days, the main person my friends bitch about is a successful writer, and much of the bitching seems to stem from the fact that he's apparently "not good enough" at what he does to make a living from it.  He actually is good enough, in my opinion.  He's not writing the modern classics of our time and nor is he necessarily excellent, but it's not as if he doesn't deserve to have some sort of profile, and he's certainly a lot more talented than most of the people doing the sniping who clearly believe they should be in his place.

People tend to bitch the most about the odd and the fortunate, don't they?  The extreme upper and lower ends of the social spectrum.

[Sexton Brackets Drugbust]

In first year at uni, there was a lad who naturally became the lowest in our group heirarchy.

He was ridiculously overconfident in all things, despite not having any natural skill, wit, charm or even manners and was also a compulsive liar and believer of insane 'facts' that he'd defend until death - everyone would make the occasional joke about everyone else, but he suffered more than anyone (usually good natured ribbing, but occasionally less so.) The self appointed alpha within the group would occasionally lambast him in a way that started off amusing, but gradually became uncomfortable and, eventually, was just flat out bullying. Funnily enough, the guy was totally accepting of this treatment and it would usually be a silly joke from me that he would deem 'too far'.

Funnily enough because he couldn't afford to move in with us in 2nd year, we saw him far less often - and without the whipping boy, the group began to suffer as the heirarchical structure changed. It turned out he genuinely served a purpose within the gang and it was our collective annoyance of him that united us - without him, other peoples flaws started to become more apparant and friendships suffered as a cost.

Fortunately, being too cool for school meant I was slightly outside of this system because I was a maverick within the unit, who couldn't be pinned down.

[Icehaven]

and without the whipping boy, the group began to suffer as the heirarchical structure changed. It turned out he genuinely served a purpose within the gang and it was our collective annoyance of him that united us - without him, other peoples flaws started to become more apparant and friendships suffered as a cost.

Very common occurence, happened with my group at Uni and several others I know of. We're a territorial, unpleasant species really aren't we? Anyway, what I notice most about threads like these is similarities between the weirdos reported. Some people have even said ''your weirdo is uncannily like mine.'' Not so weird then.

[MissInformed]

...none of us could see the artistic value of a doctors and nurses fetish act.

You still have the link to this, yes?

[Buelligan]

I find the whole idea faintly depressing, but then I'm not the sort that likes to flock about with a gang of twattering clones. 

If I were an ego maniac I might consider that I might be the person everyone likes to bitch about.  Fortunately, I am not and consequently realise I am probably the person no one even notices, which is a relief.

[SetToStun]

I know him from LGBTQ

Off-topic (sorry about that), but what's the "Q" stand for? The rest of it I knew but I've never seen that one before.

[Zetetic]

Queer.

it can also encompass: pansexual, pomosexual, intersexual, genderqueer, asexual and autosexual people, and even gender normative heterosexuals whose sexual orientations or activities place them outside the heterosexual-defined mainstream, e.g., BDSM practitioners, or polyamorous persons.

So says the Wikipedia.

[SetToStun]

Really? I did wonder if it might be that, but had thought "queer" had been reclaimed by the exclusively gay community. Just goes to show, doesn't it? Thanks for the illumination.

[Steve Lampkins]

Hmm, I don't know, wouldn't say I knew anyone like that.

I don't know if you've left this bait hanging, but I'll bite, seeing as you teed it up. Yes, it's you. You are the weird one in your group. That everyone bitches about.

[Buelligan]

Not everyone Steve.  I'm a complete outisider, a nonentity (if you will) and yet even I have heard muffled murmurings about Lamby Lampkins. 

I am only telling you this for your own good.

[Sony Walkman Prophecies]

Do people genuinely hang about in groups with implied/emplicit hierarchies? I cant recall being in a group dynmaic like that since I was 18/19, but perhaps my entire life has been the exception to the rule after in this regard. As far as individuals are concerned though, yeah, there's nothing essentially weird ('uncommon') about any of the people so far mentioned - every class, pub, office, and houseshare up and down the land has a theatrical one, a loner, a smelly sort, and a blowhard. These are all well-worn characters with whom humanity would be lost for any serious or entertaining discussion without. Learn to love these characters for the small pleasures they give, or otherwise, do what I do and dont talk to anyone apat from a literary snob called Juan Carlos who rarely leaves the house other than buy cheap wine.

[BlodwynPig]

I once lived with a pride of lions and had to suffer nightly maulings.

[Buelligan]

It was worth it though, wasn't it?  I mean, you knew they liked you really, maybe even grew to like you quite a bit, over time...

[BlodwynPig]

They liked to gnaw on my lower leg - cast me out once it was gone.

[BlodwynPig]

Ended up with a bunch of marauding gibbons after that. Chief masturbator was my role - swings and roundabouts....swings and roundabouts.

[Hank_Kingsley]

Really? I did wonder if it might be that, but had thought "queer" had been reclaimed by the exclusively gay community. Just goes to show, doesn't it? Thanks for the illumination.

You didn't know that? How queer.

[Little Hoover]

I don't know if you've left this bait hanging, but I'll bite, seeing as you teed it up. Yes, it's you. You are the weird one in your group. That everyone bitches about.

No I'm the quiet one that people are nice to because they worry I might go postal some day. But here we seem to be talking about a very assertive over-confident kind of weird which is very different from me.

[Sexton Brackets Drugbust]

Do people genuinely hang about in groups with implied/emplicit hierarchies?

They naturally establish themselves - it's not something people work out amongst themselves or advertise for when a position is available. They also tend to develop within groups that spend more time together; more casual friendships are less likely to see roles form.

Romantic couples follow certain patterns too.

[Sexton Brackets Drugbust]

We're a territorial, unpleasant species really aren't we?

Absolutely! I'm always disappointed by the aspects of the human condition that demonstrate we're still just basically animals. Shouldn't we have risen above these things by now?

[thenoise]

Queer.
So says the Wikipedia.

Innocent little me hadn't heard half those terms before.  I'm still not entirely sure what 'pomosexual' means...

A person who is pomosexual. Someone who avoids sexual orientation labels.

apart from pomosexual??