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Noel Edmonds is Unwell

Started by Ballad of Ballard Berkley, August 08, 2017, 07:23:47 PM

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touchingcloth

Quote from: kittens on June 02, 2019, 12:16:46 PM
that butterfly story is quite sweet really. i can see how, if your mind is already a bit melted, that experience and the photograph could lead one to believing in parental orbs.

I believe in parental orbs. I've seen your mum's tits.

touchingcloth

Quote from: Glebe on June 02, 2019, 12:19:15 PM
That's quite unsettling.

It's great to imagine - really, properly, vigorously imagine - isn't it? Noel Edmonds carefully feeding a butterfly from a teaspoon. Imagine it. Go on, fucking imagine it.

Ferris

Imagine seeing two butterflies in your room, and your reaction being "well, I'd best get the Mrs to knock up some of her famous sugary butterfly drink"

shiftwork2

Yeah but the butterflies enjoyed it so we're wrong and he's right.  They made appreciative noises!

Replies From View

Quote from: touchingcloth on June 02, 2019, 12:20:13 PM
I believe in parental orbs. I've seen your mum's tits.

That was his bike I think.

touchingcloth


Replies From View

Quote from: touchingcloth on June 02, 2019, 12:38:53 PM
Do you remember when he fell off it?

Yes and I'm pretty sure he wasn't trying to suck milk out of it at the time.

kalowski

Quote from: FerriswheelBueller on June 02, 2019, 12:24:20 PM
Imagine seeing two butterflies in your room, and your reaction being "well, I'd best get the Mrs to knock up some of her famous sugary butterfly drink"
Better than Neol knocking out his own.

poodlefaker

Quote"There is a very simple way of working out for yourself what the real population of this country is," he says. "It's the three 'F's' – food, faeces and farewells. Food is very tightly regulated because it has to be, for obvious reasons. Faeces is the same. We know how much shit and piss is going through the system. And as for farewells – we have a pretty good idea how many people are buried or cremated each year."

I wish he'd expanded more on the faeces. How does he know how much is going  through the system? Has he got contacts in the sewage network? How is faeces measured? Length? Frequency? If we petitioned the government under the FOI Act could we get them to release the faeces figures?

Uncle TechTip

I know someone who believes in "orbs" and thinks they can be photographed. It was a bit of dust, or a flaw on the CCD sensor. But no, she thinks it's her dead dad floating about.

TheMonk

Sorry for reigniting this thread but I though some of you might find this footage interesting.
I always thought it was said his personality would switch to a grumpy fucker as soon as the cameras were off. This footage seems to indicate otherwise no?
Was it just later that he become a prick then?
(You can skip the first 6 minutes of this to see what I mean.)
https://youtu.be/q8Eut_0d4-Y

touchingcloth

Quote from: TheMonk on July 31, 2020, 12:29:20 AM
Sorry for reigniting this thread but I though some of you might find this footage interesting.
I always thought it was said his personality would switch to a grumpy fucker as soon as the cameras were off. This footage seems to indicate otherwise no?
Was it just later that he become a prick then?
(You can skip the first 6 minutes of this to see what I mean.)
https://youtu.be/q8Eut_0d4-Y

My main thought is "how is it possible for a man to look identical in 2020 to how he did in 1993?"

And I don't mean he's found some miracle elixir which has kept him young, just that he aged terribly in the years before '93. Maybe he was like Obelix but dropped in a different potion as a bairn.

ProvanFan

It's Mr Stamen! And the retarded Philip sisters from Kent!


Dead Soon

Quote from: TheMonk on July 31, 2020, 12:29:20 AM
I always thought it was said his personality would switch to a grumpy fucker as soon as the cameras were off. This footage seems to indicate otherwise no?
Was it just later that he become a prick then?

He'd certainly become aloof by the time Deal or No Deal came about. Never hung around on set, appearing virtually at the stroke of the VT clock and sometimes leaving the set while the credits were still rolling. That's the word of an ex-contestant anyway (who bizarrely started chatting with me randomly because he was enthralled at me uploading his episode onto Youtube. Had he been waiting 14 years for just such an act?). I feel there's not enough 'out there' to suggest he was particularly fucking off the wall in recording sessions, sadly. I suppose I could find out if I was *really* arsed.

pigamus

The thing is, I don't think his niceness and affability is an act, but I think it is a learned thing - he taught himself to be affable a bit like Harold Wilson taught himself how to be funny - because of his desperate need to be liked. That's what people find unsettling about him I think.

TheMonk

Quote from: touchingcloth on July 31, 2020, 01:56:56 AM
Noel Edmonds laughs at "the little handicapped one".
That's actually quite an incredible recovery from Noel there. Does not miss a beat.
Also I just noticed in that video the producer coughing straight into his hand and then shaking Noel's hand. Different days. Different days.

BlodwynPig

Edmonds, one of the good guys. Misunderstood by many, but not me.

Dead Soon

Quote from: TheMonk on July 31, 2020, 02:39:29 AM
That's actually quite an incredible recovery from Noel there. Does not miss a beat.

Indeed, though it's likely out of pure shock. Couldn't disguise it entirely, the subtle crumbling of his voice on the word ''expression'' was probably worth instant forgiveness alone. Almost certainly that'd have been re-edited/re-shot in the Twitter era, with Noel pouring a tear waterfall of apologies.

Sebastian Cobb

This just cropped up on twitter, Noel sending for a tv critic on Noel's House Party that obviously dissed him.

https://twitter.com/chuckthomasuk/status/1289938698646122496

Annie Labuntur

Quote from: Sebastian Cobb on August 02, 2020, 11:25:44 PM
This just cropped up on twitter, Noel sending for a tv critic on Noel's House Party that obviously dissed him.

https://twitter.com/chuckthomasuk/status/1289938698646122496

He goes a bit Brent when the audience starts clapping at 25s.

kalowski

Quote from: Sebastian Cobb on August 02, 2020, 11:25:44 PM
This just cropped up on twitter, Noel sending for a tv critic on Noel's House Party that obviously dissed him.

https://twitter.com/chuckthomasuk/status/1289938698646122496
Brilliant. Mr Philip Parsons of The Times is next...

buttgammon

Can anyone date that clip? It's so uncannily close, I can't help but think that KMKY must have been based on it.

Jockice

Quote from: kalowski on August 03, 2020, 08:42:12 AM
Brilliant. Mr Philip Parsons of The Times is next...
These aren't my words. These are the words of Mike Taylor from TV Quick.

My favourite Partridge quote ever.

buzby

Quote from: buttgammon on August 03, 2020, 08:45:03 AM
Can anyone date that clip? It's so uncannily close, I can't help but think that KMKY must have been based on it.
It was Series 1, episode 4 (TX 14/12/91), so it was almost certainly the inspiration for the Partridge 'moribund' bit. Youtube link to the exact moment here.

The giveaway that it was Series 1 was the front door set behind him. It got a more detailed 'fake medieval' paintjob from Series 2 onwards.

Glebe

Next week, Noel sits in the Crinkly Bottom jacuzzi with a can of Sprünt.


buttgammon

Quote from: buzby on August 03, 2020, 10:13:56 AM
It was Series 1, episode 4 (TX 14/12/91), so it was almost certainly the inspiration for the Partridge 'moribund' bit. Youtube link to the exact moment here.

The giveaway that it was Series 1 was the front door set behind him. It got a more detailed 'fake medieval' paintjob from Series 2 onwards.

Brilliant! Thank you!