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Cab Men II: Because fact into doubt won't go

Started by Fambo Number Mive, March 29, 2018, 09:48:16 AM

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Lisa Jesusandmarychain

Quote from: gilbertharding on September 20, 2021, 10:07:27 AM
Who is he doing an impression of? There's the guy who used to introduce Shooting Stars... but there was someone before him too.

Patrick Allen?

buttgammon

Those awful Ariel ads always remind me of the "he'll take it out on the hostages, even the ones with kids" jingle from the Alan Partridge film.

icehaven

Quote from: gilbertharding on September 20, 2021, 10:07:27 AM
Who is he doing an impression of? There's the guy who used to introduce Shooting Stars... but there was someone before him too.

Didn't it start when Tom Baker narrated Little Britain? Or was that later?
Edit; No that was later than Shooting Stars.

JesusAndYourBush

Grrrrr, there's an advert with the flute part of The Mighty Quinn but with some notes changed so I have the song as an earworm whenever that damn advert is on.

paruses

Spent couple of nights in a hotel and so got to see Live TV so to speak. In the afternoon slot the ads on the channels gunning for the 65+ lot's business there seems a fair split between flogging your home to some corporate goons so you can go on a cruise and what to do when you die - specifically buy a cremation plan from Pure Cremation.

The equity release ones still shill the cruise angle but are now really pushing the "get your kids on the property ladder" angle with a deposit. I get really depressed seeing those because you know so many people are effectively being conned out of a lot of money and the potential to pass that on to their kids (or an animal rescue or whatever they want).

The Pure Cremation one does actually appeal to my frugal nature when it comes to getting rid of a dead body (even, or especially, if it's mine) although there has to be an angle on it. Maybe it's the pay up front because we'll go bust before enough of you die, or pay in hundreds of instalments with a balloon payment your family will have to come up with. I did wonder if they were a part of Pure Gym - the affordable gym membership lot and just how long it would be before we have EasyFuneral.

Gulftastic

'And my lot know how to party....'

That's one wake that won't be fight free.

icehaven

There's a new one for some insurance company that has a bloke at the end holding a spurting hose at crotch level and the stream splits into two while he looks knowingly at the camera. I definitely didn't hallucinate it, I don't think.

Edit: No I didn't https://www.policyexpert.co.uk/tv-ad/

monkfromhavana

I watch a lot more daytime ITV4 than any sane person would, these adverts are constant and all blur into one consolidated, equity released funeral plan melange.

The aforementioned Cheap Cremations one that desperately flogs the "some celebrities had had it done as well" angle. Fucking name them then, they're dead, they can't sue you. My money's on Charlie Drake.

Gurke and Hare

Saw an advert earlier with the voiceover saying "Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could control your blinds at the touch of a button?"

Well, no, it would be a little bit easier but not to the extent that I'd pay money for it.

Also, there's one at the moment that says "Did you or anyone you know buy or lease a diesel car between <some years>? If so, you could be eligible for compensation. Get in touch now yadda yadda yadda" which makes me want to call them and say "Yeah, my mate bought a diesel, how much do I get?"

paruses

Oh yea the diesel thing. That's the first time I've seen that. Is it the new PPI? I know the broad brush strokes of the emissions scandal and I had my car recalled (second hand but new enough I suppose to be included) and the garage did something while I went and ate an egg macmuffin then gave me a free tyre cleaning kit.

Do I get some money now because I am killing the planet more than I was lead to believe? Sweet.

Uncle TechTip

Peak desolation on ITV4 adverts has to be that one which just shows a wordsearch for two minutes, with one word to find, there in front of you, going from left to right, it's just obvious. Urging you to call the number and enter a draw. "Keep your brain exercised with our word games" It's an absolute disgrace really.

gilbertharding

Watching REALLY! (or something) yesterday morning, and one entire ad break was filled with a single advert for My Perfect Eyes - a product which, when applied to the skin, seems to shrink, giving the illusion that all of your lines, bags and puffiness have gone (temporarily). This advert seemed to go on forever. The lead spokesmodel went by the unlikely name of Penny Lane, and all the other spokeswomen seemed to be Australian. But the advert went on forever. And lots of the bits kept being repeated, but in slightly different orders. My Perfect Eyes - a product which, when applied to the skin, seems to shrink, giving the illusion that all of your lines, bags and puffiness have gone (temporarily). This advert seemed to go on forever.  But the advert went on forever. And lots of the bits kept being repeated, but in slightly different orders. The lead spokesmodel went by the unlikely name of Penny Lane, and all the other spokeswomen seemed to be Australian. This advert seemed to go on forever. The lead spokesmodel went by the unlikely name of Penny Lane, and all the other spokeswomen seemed to be Australian. But the advert went on forever. And lots of the bits kept being repeated, lines bags and puffiness. My Perfect Eyes - a product which, when applied to the skin, seems to shrink, giving the illusion that all of your lines, bags and puffiness have gone (temporarily). This advert seemed to go on forever. Lines, bags and puffiness. But the advert went on forever. And lots of the bits kept being repeated, but in slightly different orders. And just when you thought it was over, and they were wrapping it up, they launched into another bit of spiel about lines, bags and puffiness. The lead spokesmodel went by the unlikely name of Penny Lane, and all the other spokeswomen seemed to be Australian. The overall effect was mesmerising. You felt that, having watched so much of it, not to see the end would be a waste of time.

Quote from: paruses on October 30, 2021, 02:40:57 PM
The equity release ones still shill the cruise angle but are now really pushing the "get your kids on the property ladder" angle with a deposit. I get really depressed seeing those because you know so many people are effectively being conned out of a lot of money and the potential to pass that on to their kids (or an animal rescue or whatever they want).

Yeah, those are awful. Why let your kids rent and pass on your valuable, well built property to them when you die, when you can sell parts of it off for below market so they can afford the deposit for a shitty new build?

And the great news is that once you're gone, your lovely bungalow now belongs, at least in part, to a private company who'll likely bulldoze it to build more shitty new builds.

gilbertharding

Quote from: Huxleys Babkins on November 01, 2021, 12:10:25 PM
Yeah, those are awful. Why let your kids rent and pass on your valuable, well built property to them when you die, when you can sell parts of it off for below market so they can afford the deposit for a shitty new build?

And the great news is that once you're gone, your lovely bungalow now belongs, at least in part, to a private company who'll likely bulldoze it to build more shitty new builds.

Seems like bad advice now - but aren't the boomers, with typical savviness, merely anticipating a crash in property values, caused by their generation inevitably buying the farm?

Put it like this - I think the reason the property market hasn't even seen a 'correction' in the last 25 years is because the politicians daren't let it happen while so many over 60s (or voters, as they call them) are calling the shots. Once they're gone: who's holding the baby?

buttgammon

The 'oooooooooooooooh' ad for some contactless thing with the woman that used to be on Casualty is utterly awful.

paruses

Quote from: gilbertharding on November 01, 2021, 01:43:19 PM
Seems like bad advice now - but aren't the boomers, with typical savviness, merely anticipating a crash in property values, caused by their generation inevitably buying the farm?

Put it like this - I think the reason the property market hasn't even seen a 'correction' in the last 25 years is because the politicians daren't let it happen while so many over 60s (or voters, as they call them) are calling the shots. Once they're gone: who's holding the baby?

I don't disagree. The issue I have with it is that it's not like it's releasing housing that will be affordable/social - it really is targeting that section of not so savvy/gullible boomers (or older) and consolidating land ownership even further into the hands of a few.

paruses

Quote from: paruses on November 01, 2021, 02:49:51 PM
I don't disagree. The issue I have with it is that it's not like it's releasing housing that will be affordable/social - it really is targeting that section of not so savvy/gullible boomers (or older) and consolidating land ownership even further into the hands of a few.

Sorry what I wanted to say there was simply - I hate the ads because in the first instance they are for an out and out scheme to rip people off.

But more importantly - quick straw poll - is anyone getting hit with ads for Numan erectile disfunction tablets? I quite like the ad because it shouts the word Dong at you four times in a pleasing way. But this is all on catch up which would make me think they're targeted and I haven't been looking for anything like that not even for a friend.

Cerys

The bloke in the Halifax advert, after he kicks a football back to some kids, turns and walks back towards his place of work as the life drains from his eyes.  I want to see the sequel, in which he neatly dissects his colleagues with a craft knife on a stick and loads up the ATM with steaming wafers of Mrs Armitage.

mothman

And no matter how many times you've seen it already, when the ball rolls to his feet and then pans up to his face, you keep thinking it's going to be someone famous. David Beckham. Gareth Southgate. Lionel Blair. Nope, it's the assistant manager of the Halifax round the corner.

JesusAndYourBush

Quote from: paruses on November 01, 2021, 07:38:24 PM
But more importantly - quick straw poll - is anyone getting hit with ads for Numan erectile disfunction tablets? I quite like the ad because it shouts the word Dong at you four times in a pleasing way. But this is all on catch up which would make me think they're targeted and I haven't been looking for anything like that not even for a friend.

Not targeted, there's one on Freeview shouting dong dizzle pizzle shaft cock etc (different euphemisms for the same thing). I wouldn't have remembeted what it was advertiding if you'd not mentioned it.

Captain Z

Despair
DESPAIR
DESPAIR
DESPAIR


Oh, that's the hair loss one, isn't it. That could well be targeted based on my CaB cookies.

dissolute ocelot

Dreams the bed company now have a log as a mascot. I'm not sure if they're Ren and Stimpy fans, or they're just looking for a mascot who's more wooden than Owen Wilson.

(And yes I get all the Numan ads. But then I'm almost certainly in their target group at least age and gender.)

mothman

A log voiced by John Goodman, or someone doing an imitation of him.

dissolute ocelot

Quote from: mothman on November 04, 2021, 10:05:19 PM
A log voiced by John Goodman, or someone doing an imitation of him.
Fuck, it is John Goodman doing their ads. He's also apparently a yellow M&M.

seepage

A car in the sponsor's ad before lineker's Sitting on a Fortune has the number plate Y021 CUM - which one of you was that?

Poobum

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_BqjFOXuCpU

Saw this at cinema and was utterly baffled. WOW has become self aware and the game players were causing unimaginable suffering to a burgeoning sentience?? Drink coke???

Gurke and Hare

Promoted tweets sometimes have videos in them, and recently I've started seeing adverts playing before them. The people promoting must be thrilled that I'm not even seeing the first two seconds of their advert as I scroll past any more.

mothman

I find myself rather liking the Lidl Christmas advert. There's something almost anarchic about it. And lots of little details to notice each time I see it - if I'm able; it flies by a bit fast.

https://youtu.be/SfexHlJ-BVU

And I haven't seen the John Lewis advert on TV at all? Or has it not been officially released on TV..?

JesusAndYourBush

Yes the Lidl advert is a good one, I saw it for the first time this evening.

I thought it was too early for the John Lewis ad but I just looked and it's on youtube. That bloody song seems familiar though, so maybe it's been on and I wasn't paying attention.

jamiefairlie

Quote from: gilbertharding on September 20, 2021, 10:07:27 AM
Who is he doing an impression of? There's the guy who used to introduce Shooting Stars... but there was someone before him too.

The voiceover guy from "Sale of the Century"?