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March 28, 2024, 05:48:40 PM

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LEGEND GARY PART TWO

Started by Fambo Number Mive, August 28, 2019, 08:17:01 AM

Previous topic - Next topic

Glebe

"Welcome to this special charity edition of The Chase, now Gary, what is your charity of choice?"

"Our Brave Boys."

"Alright mate, I wish you luck. Here we go."

Glebe

Gary discovers that he has to recharge Daz every few hours now. "I think you need a new battery mate, bloody Chinese batteries!"

Fambo Number Mive

Gary empties the recycling into his general bin this week to "compensate" for Daz getting an electric car.


Shoulders?-Stomach!

Quote from: Fambo Number Mive on November 08, 2021, 11:31:54 AM
Gary empties the recycling into his general bin this week to "compensate" for Daz getting an electric car.

Excellent

Glebe

Gary is absolutely buzzing on Tesco gin.

Fambo Number Mive

Gary makes a picture of Michael Gove out of his nasal hair and invites Gove to come and see it.

Glebe

Daz finds Gary going around the local shopping centre on a child's trike.

wosl

Legend Gary buries Daz and jumps up and down on the ground above trying to convert him into fossil fuel.

Captain Poodle Basher

Gary phones the local radio station to complain about the levels of prostitution in his fair town.

"I'm telling you Brian, it's nothing but bifters and munters out there. Puts you off your stroke if you know what I mean."


Glebe

Quote from: Captain Poodle Basher on November 09, 2021, 07:19:47 PMGary phones the local radio station to complain about the levels of prostitution in his fair town.

"I'm telling you Brian, it's nothing but bifters and munters out there. Puts you off your stroke if you know what I mean."

"I've had to murder a few, I'm that disappointed. I will kill again!"

Glebe

Gary builds up a big coal fire and feeds it with Greenpeace leaflets. "Take that, Gretel Thurnburg!"

Glebe

"They weren't happy with people 'taking the knee' Daz, now they've got their own holiday!"

"That's not what Black Friday is Gary."

king_tubby


Glebe

"Not many shoplifting in Tesco Express days left until Christmas now, Daz! Fancy a new lighter?"

Glebe

Gary buys an expresso machine but he can't turn it on.

Shoulders?-Stomach!

Legend Gary tricks Storage Andy into storing 28 boxes filled with absolutely fuck all.

'He'll be mugged right off when he finds out!'

Legend Gary has paid £45.50 for the storage for a month.

Fambo Number Mive

Legend Gary refuses to wear a mask in the hospital because "Boris doesn't"

"Yes, but you are a surgeon, Gary"

Sebastian Cobb

Gary tells Daz he wants to 'get in on this viral big chip action'.

"what, like the blockchain Gary?"

"fuck you talking about darren?"

Glebe

Gary's latest TikTok is Gary's bare arse while Daz screams "Fuck Solskjær!"

Glebe

Daz is doing really well in a job interview when Gary slowly rises up behind him and starts doing a wank hand gesture.

Fambo Number Mive

Steak Terry admits his claim of getting an 8 inch chip at Wetherspoons was a lie after Gary waterboards him.

Glebe

Quote from: Fambo Number Mive on November 13, 2021, 08:43:38 PMSteak Terry admits his claim of getting an 8 inch chip at Wetherspoons was a lie after Gary waterboards him.

Heh!

Blue Jam

Legend Gary is so legendary that even Banksy has to pay tribute to him:

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-hereford-worcester-59280919

Blue Jam

Legend Gary's bucket list:

1. Moon a speed camera
2. Platinum FIFA 18
3. Find a nine-inch chip at Nando's

Glebe

Gary is in his local CEX stinking of gin with all sick on his trousers screaming "WHY'VE YE NO DREAMCAST GAMES?"

Shoulders?-Stomach!

Legend Gary fails the Pubes Daz Doorstep Challenge, so lifts him into a river.

Glebe

Gary and Daz are in Carpetright, the former rolling the later around the shop in a large rug while a member of staff fetches the manager. "Shag carpet heh Daz!"

Fambo Number Mive

Gary has bought four boxes of tissues for when the Queen dies. "She was more devoted to duty than all those Tiktok nurses we clapped for, Daz."

Captain Poodle Basher

Quote from: Fambo Number Mive on November 15, 2021, 05:01:33 PM
Gary has bought four boxes of tissues for when the Queen dies. "She was more devoted to duty than all those Tiktok nurses we clapped for, Daz."

Daz considers a retort along the lines of Gary giving nurses the clap but thinks better of it.

Unfortunately, Gary knows him only too well and batters Daz for having the nerve to be thinking about insulting him.

dex

Quote from: Glebe on November 13, 2021, 05:06:21 PM
Gary's latest TikTok is Gary's bare arse while Daz screams "Fuck Solskjær!"

Ha!